Pathological liar symptoms. Pathological lies of an adult psychiatry

How to recognize mental disorders in a person and what to do to protect your own mental health? Walking through life, we meet a lot different people with which we build different types relations. In most cases, the people with whom we decide to build friendships impress us on many levels - emotionally, intellectually, spiritually, physically, and so on. If, after some time, we notice a discrepancy at some of the levels, then internal discomfort arises and the relationship goes into a less deep form, descending to the level of acquaintance or “hi-bye”. Often this happens with childhood friends when personal development goes on. different speeds and in different directions. It happened to me with several girlfriends: after a very close friendship in childhood and adolescence, we did not communicate for some time, and after the resumption of relations in adulthood, it came to an understanding that this was not “your” person. This is an interesting process, often emotionally painful (how can it be, we have been friends for so many years, consider that we grew up together, and now there is nothing to talk about?), but natural and natural. Se la vie, as the French say.

In this article, we will not talk about regular processes, but about anomalies. On the Russian-speaking Internet, the topic of mental disorders in outwardly normal and ordinary people is rather poorly covered. Sites of psychology and psychoanalysis touch upon it superficially, within the framework of an appendage to a narcotic or alcohol addiction. In the English-language Internet, this topic is covered very widely, with symptoms and a diagnosis, with stories of people who have become victims and hostages of pathological liars and patients with narcissism. There are also stories of the patients themselves about how they perceive the world and why they behave inappropriately.

I'm not a psychologist and I don't even pretend to be that title, so if I miss or distort something, add and correct it! I share my observations and searches, as I have been in close contact with pathological liars and "narcissists" several times in my life, they made a vivid impression on me. Of course, there are no people who correspond one hundred percent to what is described below, but some signs in different combinations are often present in people with pathology. Perhaps this article will help some of the women, since according to statistics, men are more likely to suffer from mental disorders of this plan, and women more often become hostages and victims.

So, pathological liars or Munchausen's syndrome.

If you are a person for whom honesty and moral, decent behavior of people carry value and importance, then a close relationship with a pathological liar can become a nightmare that you have never experienced in your life and did not even think that this was possible. Such relationships will devastate you morally and emotionally, it may seem to you that the end of the world has come, and you do not know how to live on. The reason for this state will be the discrepancy between your reality and the world created by the pathological liar. You are used to a world where white is white and black is black, and they convince you that the opposite is true.

The emergence of this disorder psychologists refer to a number of traumatic events that happened to a person in childhood. It can be constant humiliation and criticism from adults, lack of love from parents, unrequited first love or rejection by the opposite sex, which leads to low self-esteem during growing up. Sometimes the same disorder can manifest itself already in adulthood after a traumatic brain injury. Also, researchers at the University of Southern California found that pathological lies also have a physical basis. Their conclusion was that the brain of pathological liars differs from the norm: in its prefrontal cortex, the volume is reduced. gray matter(neurons) and a 22 percent increase in volume white matter(nerve fibers that connect parts of the brain). This part of the brain is associated with both learning moral behavior and feelings of remorse. The gray matter consists of brain cells, and the white is like a "connecting wiring" between them. An excess of white matter increases the ability of pathological liars to lie (it is much easier for them to do the difficult work of fantasy) and weakens their moral restraint. Our morals and model of correct behavior are not obligatory for them, although in childhood these people were taught that it is not good to lie, just like everyone else.

The degree of manifestation of this disease can be different. The spouses of some pathological liars note that these people lie for no reason, just like that, and lie about small, unimportant things. For example, they lie that they did something yesterday, and not today, for no apparent reason or benefit. Psychologists say that pathological liars may or may not believe their lies. People with severe disease believe their own stories. They create around themselves such a world as they need at the moment in a conversation with this interlocutor. Often, switching to a new interlocutor, they create a completely different world. Pathological liars with a less severe form of the disease know that they are lying, but believe that their lies do not harm anyone, so they do not understand why people around them are offended and turn away from them. On the contrary, lying helps them raise their self-esteem in the eyes of others, i.e. to create themselves as they would like, and not as they really are. Because often the reality of their own person and life does not satisfy them so much that they consider life in a fantasy world to be the way out of the situation.

Typical pathological liar behavior:

. The story of the same event changes every time.
. Lies and exaggerates not only significant events in life to give himself more importance, but also lies in everyday situations when it does not bring benefits.
. Whatever you do, the pathological liar will tell you that he can do it better than you.
. The truth has no value. Moral behavior is irrelevant.
. He/she will defend and dodge when they are put against the wall. He has exceptional skills to dodge in any situation and transfer the blame to you.
. He does not see anything wrong with the fact that he / she is lying. After all, it does no harm to anyone.
. Never admit to lying. Can confess in a perverted form (in a way that doesn’t even look like a confession) only in exceptional cases: when exposure can really harm the family/work/life of a pathological liar. That is, to make an unloved reality even worse.
. He often forgets what he has already lied to. For this reason, he often gives out opposite opinions, refutes himself.
. Chameleonism - adapts to a stronger personality or to a person from whom something is needed. He tries to guess which of the answers you need, often does not have his own opinion.
. “There is nothing sacred for this person” - he can lie about a fracture in a child, illness of a spouse, death in the family, etc. and so on. He takes advantage of the fact that a normal person considers such a lie impossible and blasphemous - well, people don’t lie about such things!

The reaction of a normal person to a lie is anger, disappointment and resentment, as well as the desire to prove to the liar that he is lying and the desire to change / re-educate him. But when dealing with a pathological liar, it's important to remember that they're not lying to hurt you (although purposefully hurtful lies are also not uncommon in people with narcissism), but to make themselves feel better. Pathological liars often have few friends.

Is there a cure? Is it possible to fix such a person? Psychologists disagree. It is clear that a person should want to improve himself, but how is this possible if the structure of his brain does not allow him to believe that lying is bad? It appears that there is no cure.

But what about everyone who has experienced or is experiencing the nightmare of communicating with such a person? Here are some tips:

. Repeating to yourself many times that a person is sick and that moral examples and instructions will not help, on the contrary, you will only exhaust yourself.
. Stop believing in his fables and fables, no matter how plausible they may seem. Question every word that comes out of his mouth.
. Stop thinking that you hurt the feelings of this person with something and therefore he behaves this way. You have nothing to do with it, this is a disease. A pathological liar, due to his illness, does not suffer from remorse and does not think about how you feel, he does not care.
. Kill the hope in yourself (and she dies last) that this person will become better.
. Stop giving chances.
. Emotionally break away, separate and not hope for change.
. If possible, remove this person from yourself, cut off all channels of communication.
. Catch your breath, rest and restore your world, in which white is still white.
. Resist the temptation to put a pathological liar against the wall, as this is fraught with a deterioration in his mental state.
. Remember that a pathological liar will never get used to the real world, it is easier for him to live in his castle in the air.

Alyonka (USA)

Good morning. Alexey, I think this pathological liar girl is not indifferent to you. Unfortunately, pathological lying is a disease. And his name is "Munchausen's syndrome." Alexey, so that the “Munchausen syndrome” becomes a little clear to you, I will tell you a little about it. I'll start with the causes of the disease.

First reason. Traumatic childhood events. For example: constant humiliation, criticism from adults, lack of love from parents, unrequited first love, rejection by boys. All this contributed to the formation of low self-esteem in the girl during the period of growing up.

The second reason. Sequelae of traumatic brain injury.

Third reason. Imbalance of gray and white matter of brain cells. Scientists (University of Southern California) have determined that there is a region in the brain responsible for learning moral behavior and for feeling a sense of remorse. Also, white matter increases the ability of pathological liars to lie and weakens their moral restraint. So, in pathological liars, white matter is present in excess. That is why morality and a model of correct behavior are not obligatory for them, and from childhood.

Alexei, you want to help this girl. Complimentary wish. The opinions of experts differ. But, as is well known, a person must want to improve himself. Alexey, now, knowing the third cause of this disease, answer the main question yourself: is it possible for a girl to change (even if she wants to) if her brain structure does not allow her to believe that lying is bad?

Accept, if you see fit, some advice.

1. Remember - the girl is sick. Neither moralizing nor moral instructions will help her. "Like peas on the wall." Remember the girl, due to his illness, does not suffer from remorse and does not think about how you feel, she does not care.

2. Don't expect the girl to get better. Alas.

3. Stop giving her chances for corrections, giving ultimatums.

4. Resist the temptation to put a girl in front of a "fact" because it threatens to worsen her mental state.

5. Remember that a girl will never get used to the real world. It is much easier for her to live in her own invented world.

So such a sad story.

Wisdom to you. Lydia.

P.S. Dear customer, our experts have spent their time and their professional knowledge to answer your question. Please show your good manners: choose the best answer and mark the answers of other experts. Remember, the expert's opinion may not coincide with your opinion about the problem, and this is not a reason to give the expert a minus.

There are more of these people than we think, and they are found not only in the stamped plots of Hollywood films. Similar characters may be among your friends, acquaintances, and my close friend has been married to such a person for four years. It's about about pathological liars - people suffering from the so-called Munchausen syndrome. And although the name of a literary character evokes pleasant associations, a meeting with similar person does not bring pleasure in life.

What is a pathological lie? Chronic liars who lie for their own benefit or from, as well as people who speak with an authoritative air about unfamiliar subjects, do not belong to pathological liars. These are ordinary liars, pretenders and masters of splurge. To encounter such a person is unpleasant, and to catch him in a lie is disgusting, but not difficult. All these liars are distinguished by one single characteristic: they know very well that they are lying. With good acting data, they can play a whole performance in front of you - but to themselves they always remember that they are telling a lie.

Quite another matter - pathological liars. These people have been living in their castles in the air for so long that they already consider them real. Have you ever met adults who suddenly, under the guise of a revelation, began to tell exciting stories from life - moreover, so incredible that it was hard to believe in them? Maybe you would believe: you never know what adventures life throws up? - yes, the facts do not agree, and there are too many alarming details.

He liked to tell my girlfriend “in confidence” about how he flew planes in his youth, although he does not have a private pilot certificate and did not graduate from a flight school. How did he succeed? - Yes, illegally, contacts and acquaintances at the airport helped. - That's great, but you won't take us? No, I don't fly anymore. I have lost all contacts with my friends... Now there are more stringent checks, terrorist attacks have become more frequent... It seems that the story is not so unrealistic - you never know people earn money illegally. In addition, my friend's husband was really well versed in aviation, knew all the intricacies of aircraft construction and could name every lever on the dashboard. But how did he manage to get illegally into such a responsible job? And why is there no connection with good friends who dared to take him on a flight? And the most incredible thing: his close relatives, as well as friends whose work was related to aviation, did not know about the "secret flights". “They won't understand,” he sighed, and forbade even raising this topic in the presence of the mentioned persons. And now it was already quite suspicious.

Another acquaintance promised young musicians who dreamed of creating a rock band to get an electric guitar amplifier for free, citing friendship with the owner of a prestigious recording studio. Weeks and months passed, nothing was heard about the amplifier ... When the guys reminded him of the promise, he told incredible stories: the owner of the studio went abroad for a long time, and then went bankrupt and was forced to sell all the property.

All of these signs are alarming bells, when they appear, you should think about the adequacy of your counterpart. Take, for example, the story with the amplifier: having lied once, an ordinary person would come up with the simplest excuse the next time. For example, the owner of the studio is conceited and does not want to borrow equipment for free, is afraid for its safety, or simply does not answer calls. And everyone would forget about history in a week. But a person with Munchausen's syndrome needs the scope of events, drama.

Telling fantastic stories to make yourself feel special is a four-to-six-year-old behavior. Having met him at his peer, an adult is lost and ... sometimes believes what is told. Firstly, it is difficult to imagine that an overgrown, in appearance an adequate person made up a story from beginning to end with so many details. It smacks of something unhealthy. Secondly, the emotions of a pathological liar are sincere: he himself has long believed in what he says. That is, some part of his consciousness is aware that the described events did not occur, but it is blocked. And most importantly, if someone close to you is a pathological liar, it’s hard for you to come to terms with the thought of his constant lies.

A close acquaintance, and even more so marriage with a person suffering from Munchausen syndrome, can become a real psychological trauma. The reality in which your loved one exists does not fit in with the usual reality. There are things happening that really can't happen. You will be assured that black is white, and vice versa, and if you try to figure it out, they will arrange a scandal or a boycott for you.

Typical signs of a pathological liar:

The story of one event changes from time to time. Your interlocutor is confused in details, dates and names. The new company may tell the same story with different details.

In addition to large, detailed lies, lies on trifles where it has no obvious practical benefit. For example, he can name different cities where he was born.

He does not see anything terrible in his lies (with a lesser severity of the disorder), or does not recognize it at all under any circumstances (most often this is the case).

A pathological liar cannot be pinned to a wall. When trying to expose him, he will ingeniously get out, coming up with even more implausible excuses, which, however, are difficult to verify. Witnesses of the events will turn out to be emigrated, dead, fled with forged documents. Can pressure you emotionally and try to shift the blame, make you feel ashamed that you don't believe him.

Nothing is sacred to a pathological liar. He can lie about someone's serious illness or death, denigrate his loved ones, it's easy to say nasty things about a common friend.

Emotional assessments of the same facts will change depending on the situation and environment. A month later, he can say about the same acquaintance that he is a wonderful person. If you are reminded of his negative assessment, he will flare up and accuse you of exaggeration, or, on the contrary, indifferently say that he was wrong and changed his mind.

The only case when a pathological liar is able to admit to a lie: when exposure can actually damage his work, family or life - that is, make an unhappy reality even worse. Moreover, recognition usually takes place in a form that cannot even be called recognition.

If there are at least three or four signs, it can be safely assumed that a person suffers from Munchausen's syndrome. What to do if you recognize in him one of your loved ones?

First of all, acknowledge the problem. If your friend or spouse often gives out such "artistic lies", deep down you already guessed it. Stop believing in his (her) tall tales, they destroy your own reality. Do not justify him and do not hope that she (she) will change for you, do not try to convince him. Munchausen's syndrome is a rather serious behavioral disorder that a psychotherapist must correct. If possible, separate psychologically and spatially, or better yet, cut off all contacts altogether. The friend mentioned at the beginning of the text divorced her husband. She wanted to live in a world where white is white.

Mythomania: who are they - pathological priests and science fiction writers

Any person wants to show himself in society in a more favorable light. We strive to disguise our shortcomings and highlight our strengths. We want to show off our wits and demonstrate excellent knowledge. Sometimes we deliberately hide some details or try to slip away from an unpleasant topic of conversation.
However, in most situations, silence or a noble lie is caused by objectively existing circumstances and is designed to achieve lofty goals. When we hide some details, we are guided by quite normal desires: not to hurt a person mental trauma and protect the opponent from worries. We sometimes resort to a "small" lie to hide our minor mistakes or to convince the interlocutor of our competence. Such a lie of a person is an episodic phenomenon, in other aspects of life we ​​do not lose touch with reality and are guided by existing moral principles.

However, there are people obsessed with the need to constantly lie and deceive. The unnatural uncontrollable need to report false information in the scientific community is called mythomania or pseudology.

How pathological lies manifest: signs of mythomania
The thinking of mythomaniacs is controlled by an uncontrollable desire to appear before others in the most attractive appearance. Such persons have an obsessive desire to stand out among the crowd at any cost. Such subjects tend to exaggerate their merits, talents, and achievements. They deliberately and purposefully distort real facts. Very often, such people are so involved in the role they play that they themselves do not understand what is the truth in their reality, and what is a product of fantasy.
The stories of the mythomaniac in most cases are oriented towards presenting oneself in an advantageous position. The pathological liar "decorates" the hero of his story, which he almost always is. A patient with pseudology, like Baron Munchausen, describes himself as a fantastically brave, courageous, resourceful person. The mythomaniac sincerely believes that he has accomplished superhuman feats or achieved impressive grandiose successes.

The pathological liar is unaware of the abnormality of his condition. He does not realize that his writing of fantastic stories is not due to existing necessity, but is the product of defects in the mental sphere.
Initially, pathological deceit is due to the unconscious need of the individual to attract the attention of society by demonstrating facts confirming its significance. However, since there are objectively no aspects in the individual's life that could provide his authority, he "creates" such arguments in his fantasy.

In the future, the tendency to report false information develops into a bad habit, and deceit becomes the dominant trait of a person’s character. At this stage, the subject still has the ability to control his behavior, and he is fully aware that he is telling a lie. If a person has not been able to transform such a negative aspect of character by purposeful efforts of the will, the lie captures his thinking more and more and penetrates deeper, eventually leading to a psychopathological symptom - mythomania.
The transformation of the habit of lying into pseudology leads to the fact that a person loses the opportunity to critical appraisal their stories. The development of mythomania is characterized by the fact that the patient does not understand that he is reporting false information. Such an individual firmly believes that his stories are true. Telling a lie and deceiving others, such a subject cannot stop. Even when real factors indicate that a person is lying, and he is on the threshold of exposure, the sick mythomaniac does not stop lying.

Mythomania can occur in any person, regardless of their gender and age category. Pseudology is distinguished by a rapid aggravation of the state: over time, a person begins to lie more and more, while his deceptions concern both global topics and trifling situations.
Mythomania brings a lot of negative moments in a person's life. A pathological liar very quickly loses the credibility of his colleagues. He is no longer trusted to perform some responsible tasks. He is not involved in promising projects. He does not participate in exciting collective activities. The reputation of a deceiver puts an end to career advancement and does not allow you to make a career.

A patient with mythomania loses friends and acquaintances, who, of course, do not want to be deceived once again. He becomes an outcast in society. He is not invited to friendly parties. Acquaintances try to protect themselves from communicating with a deceitful person, not wanting to be drawn into fantastic performances.
A pathological liar doesn't get along well with the opposite sex. If at the initial stage of meetings he can impress a new acquaintance, then in the future the insincerity and falsity of the stories, the motives of the mythomaniac become obvious. His partner repeatedly receives convincing evidence of deception.

At the same time, it becomes clear to others that it is not possible to convince and re-educate a pathological liar. The tendency to lie, in the truest sense of the word, is in the blood of the mythomaniac. Not wanting to exist in a world of lies, any adequate person will stop all contact with a pathological liar. As a result, the mythomaniac becomes isolated from various social groups. He ends up with nothing, having neither friends nor family.

Why they become pathological liars: the causes of mythomania
Pseudology can be an independent isolated problem, manifesting itself in the fact that in the personality portrait of a mythomaniac the dominant feature is a tendency to deception. Mythomania can also concomitant symptom severe and intractable mental disorders.
Pathological deceit and fantasy are often present in the structure of schizophrenia. The characteristic manifestations of this disease are the disorganization of thinking, the unusualness of speech activity, auditory hallucinations, delusional inclusions. A typical symptom of schizoaffective disorder is persistent delusions that are not characteristic of the subculture of this person. Therefore, those phenomena that the average layman interprets as a deliberate distortion of information in schizophrenia are only an external manifestation of delusional ideas.

The tendency to report false information is also present within the hypochondriacal disorder. A patient with hypochondria is not at all aware that he is lying when he tells doctors numerous complaints about his well-being. Such a person is sincerely convinced that he is sick with some kind of difficult to diagnose and incurable disease. That is why he describes confidently and believably the symptoms of "existing" diseases. However, signs of any somatic defects are not confirmed by the results of multiple examinations. Therefore, others get the impression that the hypochondriac is blatantly lying.
Mythomania is an integral phenomenon in hysterical neurosis. Hysteria is manifested, first of all, by demonstrative emotional reactions. For the sake of attracting the attention of the crowd, tears come out for no reason, or uncontrollable laughter overcomes him. The patient's behavior lacks simplicity and naturalness. All his gestures, facial expressions, statements, movements are feigned and are perceived by people as fake.

Mythomania is a mandatory component of antisocial personality disorder. Persons suffering from this pathology are not able to comply with the social and moral standards that prevail in society. They are always ready to deceive, they can use false names, they are able to resort to other methods of fraud and manipulation for their own benefit or to achieve power. Such people lie and cheat in order to experience pleasure in the form of sex or money.
Pseudology is a disorder that affects people with inadequately low self-esteem. Many mythomaniacs suffer from an inferiority complex. They consider themselves incompetent and defective. They begin to compose fantastic stories about their person in order to feel needed and important. Each new deception they successfully produce improves their self-image and self-esteem.

Mythomania is inherent in people who lack the communication skills necessary for normal interaction in the human community. Many pathological liars actually turn out to be timid and shy people. They are indecisive and cowardly. They do not know in what constructive ways one can earn prestige in society. They are driven by the fear of being rejected and expelled from the social cell. To stay afloat and be accepted into the collective, mythomaniacs begin to build a fantastic castle out of exaggeration and distortion of the truth.
Often mythomania arises as a result of an overwhelming sense of guilt. A subject who realizes that he was wrong and knows that his actions are illegal understands the need to hide the truth in order not to be exposed. Withholding true information, concealing existing facts, concealing the truth are just attempts by a person to make himself invulnerable, a desire to evade responsibility. However, the more an individual begins to lie, the more the lie drags him into the pool. As a result, having stepped on the path of deceit, a person begins to lie all the time, moreover, he tells lies not only in those situations that could expose him. He begins to lie over trifles, at every opportunity he invents fantastic stories.

Pathological lie is a method of hiding the imperfections and flaws of the inner world. Starting to deceive, the subject tries to mask the existing fears and anxieties. Starting to lie, the person tries to eliminate psychological discomfort. Deliberate deception of other people is an attempt to eliminate the existing dissatisfaction with life.
That is why many mythomaniacs are united by a common feature. These pathological liars are inactive passive observers by nature. They are not accustomed to actively act and do not know how to win. They are not able to make the required efforts to obtain the desired benefits and achieve the goal. These are ostriches that hide their heads in the sand.

They do not know what wealth is, a successful career, personal development, creative growth. For them, the states of true love and complete enjoyment of life are alien. Trying to brighten up their gray existence, such individuals begin to wishful thinking. The true goal of such pathological liars is to create the illusion of success, to attract the attention of other people to their person, to prove the significance and importance of their own person.
There is another group of mythomaniacs. The lies of such persons are completely disinterested and not focused on gaining benefits. These subjects are not attracted by the desire to mislead someone, thereby obtaining some kind of reward or advantage. They are attracted by the very process of myth-making: they compose various fables for the sake of "love of art." Such people love to fantasize and invent, although they are aware that others will perceive their creation only as fiction. However, such entertainers do not stop, even if they are rather rudely and unceremoniously exposed in a lie. For them, lying is a way of demonstrating their unrealized creative potential. They lie because they believe that people's lives are monotonous and not interesting enough. And with their creativity, they bring a certain zest.

How to get rid of pathological deceit: methods of overcoming
The best course of action, if symptoms of mythomania are found, is to contact a psychologist or psychotherapist. However, a person prone to pathological lies most often cannot take such a step on his own. Various circumstances hold him back from going to the doctor: fear of being exposed, unwillingness to change anything in his reality, fear of running into reproaches or other arguments.
That is why the main work is entrusted to the relatives of the mythomaniac. Although relatives of a pathological liar have suffered greatly from the insincerity and deceitfulness of their relative, only they can motivate a person to begin treatment for liberation from abnormal passion. Relatives of the mythomaniac require patience and perseverance. They must act gently, tactfully and delicately. However, this does not mean that they should indulge the mythomaniac, cover up his lies and assist him in deception.

Very often, the only way to stop a liar is to give him an ultimatum: either he stops lying and turns to a specialist, or all relations with him are stopped once and for all. For many mythomaniacs, the necessary condition for their well-being is regular confirmation of the recognition of their merits by others. Such signs are most often sent by close people. Therefore, the fear of being rejected by relatives becomes a strong incentive for them to go to the doctor.
What does the psychotherapist do in case of confirmation of pseudology? The doctor strengthens a person's desire to return to the real world. It helps the patient to distinguish false from true information. During psychotherapeutic sessions, the patient gains self-respect and accepts his own individuality. Psychotherapy allows the subject to overcome self-doubt and get rid of destructive complexes. The specialist tells the client how to establish normal contacts in different social cells.

The main task of psychotherapy is to find out for what reasons and for what purposes a person is lying. Some people lie to gain control of a situation and force other people to do what they want. In such a situation, the doctor tells the patient about techniques, the use of which will help to achieve authority in society and become a leader without resorting to lies.
There are people who use storytelling to comfort themselves. It is very difficult for such people to speak the truth out loud, because the message true facts causes tension and embarrassment. In this case, the psychotherapist suggests what relaxation techniques exist that can eliminate psychological discomfort.

To get rid of pathological deceit, you need to identify situations in which there is an obsessive desire to lie. With the help of psychotherapy, you can find out what provokes a person to lie. After establishing such patterns, the doctor will help invent effective ways counter such situations. Traumatic circumstances and annoying factors can be bypassed or ignored. However, the best way is to learn to overcome difficulties honestly and painlessly.
For example, in order to increase your status at work and gain authority in the existing circle, you need to clearly define your life position. The presence of one's own opinion about what is happening, a clear prioritization, an understanding of one's goals will become the foundation for building relationships in society. A person who is aware of his needs is able to constructively declare his interests. A strong inner core gives him the power to defend his point of view and not embellish the facts.

Despite the folly of the present world, we must be equal to the highest virtues. Do not fall into the dirty environment of lies and hypocrisy. Strive to be decent and honest to people and to yourself. To believe that the world is fair: doing good and recognizing the truth will be the basis for the formation of self-respect. It must be remembered that self-respecting, honest man It has full right be proud of yourself and declare the whole truth about yourself.
It should be borne in mind that if you are unable to reveal the truth, it is better not to report anything at all. When the temptation arises to lie in response to unpleasant question, it is better to remain silent. It must be remembered that you are not obliged to give explanations and comments to someone. Any person has the right not to disclose information that is confidential to him.

To get rid of mythomania, you need to practice daily to tell the truth. You need to make it a rule: before you start the story, answer yourself the question: are you going to reveal true information, or are you drawn to tell false facts. In the second case, the best way out is to simply say nothing. This practice leads to the fact that a person takes control of his thinking. He begins to clearly understand when his remarks are true and when they are false. Thus, over time, he builds a barrier that prevents the expression of false information.

To consolidate the habit of telling the truth, it is advisable to communicate with pleasant people on neutral topics. In conversations, try to avoid talking about yourself. You can discuss political news or sports events. You can talk on philosophical topics. To avoid untruths, it is worth considering ideas regarding the world of fashion or tourism.

To get rid of pseudology, you need to look for examples of honest and dignified behavior of people. You can read the practices of spiritual leaders. Study the works of famous philosophers. Try to understand what character traits make leaders popular social movements.
Remember: when you get rid of mythomania, you will gain independence and be able to be yourself.

The late Saramago, who was awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1998, once said, “Humanity has gone through different periods- the Stone Age, the Bronze Age and survived to this day - the age of lies.

Lying has become a tradition, a habit, and I would dare to say a culture.” This literary statement of the Portuguese writer can become something much more serious than just a beautiful literary saying. Today, a pathological lie is a personality disorder when a person is in a state of a pathological state all the time, literally distorting reality, called mythomania, from the Greek "myth" (lie) and "mania" (coercion).

How do you become a mythomaniac?

Mythomania refers to a disorder that does not occur without harmful effects. On the contrary, the disease has a number negative effects on various levels. In society, the development of the disorder begins with the loss of one's authority and gaining the title of "storyteller", initially at home. Gradually, the pathological desire goes beyond the boundaries of the home society into the field of professional activity, trust in a person is lost more and more, fewer and fewer friends remain, and, as a rule, everything ends with isolation from the social group.

According to research, pathological liars have less information-processing gray matter in their brains and more information-transmitting white matter in their prefrontal cortex. Scientists believe that this abnormal brain structure may be one of the reasons for the desire to lie all the time. This psychological disorder can, in some cases, cause notorious scandalous cases, as, for example, in the case of Enrique Marco, a Spaniard who for 30 years of his life told everyone that he was imprisoned by the Nazis in the Flossenbürg concentration camp (Germany).

In any case, mythomania is not a disease in itself, but includes a set of symptoms that can manifest themselves as various mental illnesses, in particular personality disorders. Thus, specific statistics do not exist for the number of people affected by this problem. Also, it is not known whether men or women are more commonly affected.

The condition is often a sign of schizophrenia, however in these cases it is a secondary symptom. According to experts, the pathology can also occur in people suffering from a fictitious disorder of hypochondria, whereby the suffering patient practically invents the disease that he supposedly has.

You should always find the difference between a liar who lies to protect himself or loved ones for a specific purpose, and mythomaniacs who recreate reality and themselves begin to believe in what they invented.

Mythomania is a disease that usually affects people with low self-esteem. They lie to feel important and because they are unable to communicate effectively with other people. Such patients are able to attract attention only by exaggerating the situation or inventing stories, sometimes quite anecdotal.

After finding similar signs, the best thing to do is to see a specialist. Although it is difficult to talk about treatment and, even more so, about a cure, it is most likely the only form of help. At the very least, the psychologist will be able to help the patient try to return to the real world, distinguish lies from reality, instill self-esteem skills, overcome self-doubt, and so on. If there are other symptoms, sometimes treatment may be supplemented with sedatives or antidepressants.

Determining the characteristics of a pathological lie

• The patient's stories are usually dazzling or fantastical, but do not violate the limits of plausibility, which is the key to identifying a pathological liar. The stories are not a manifestation of delusion or some extended type of psychosis. With an appropriate approach, the patient, in the end, may recognize the fruits of his fiction as untrue, albeit reluctantly.
• A chronic manufacturing tendency is not caused by the immediate situation or social pressure, at least not as much as an innate personality trait organizes.
• Some internal or external influences on the patient may serve as a motive for behavior. For example, prolonged extortion or blackmail can lead to repeated and incessant lying and develop into a pathological state.
• The stories tend to lean towards presenting the vantage point of the liar. The patient "decorates" his hero, who often becomes himself. He tells stories that describe him as a hero or a victim. For example, a person may be presented as a fantastically brave husband, may be associated with many famous people, or having a high position in society or wealth.
• Pathological lying can also be presented as a false memory syndrome, where the sufferer sincerely believes that fictitious events actually happened. The patient may believe that he has achieved superhuman feats or impressive acts of altruism, love, or performed grandiose acts of diabolical evil, which he must now atone for or has already atoned for in his fantasies.

Diagnosis of pathological lies

Diagnosis of pathological lying can be very difficult, since various diagnostic criteria, including international ones, do not contain any precise criteria for assessing the state.

Many other illnesses can exhibit pathological lying as a symptom of illnesses, such as psychopathy, antisocial behavior, borderline disorder, and narcissistic personality disorders. In addition, excessive lying is common symptom several fairly complex psychopathological conditions.

On lie detector tests, patients show excitement, stress, and guilt from their deceit. It's not the same as psychopaths who don't have any of these reactions. People affected by antisocial disorder lie out of a sense of personal gain in the form of money, sex, and power.

Mythomania - strictly internal pathology. Difference between borderline disorder personality and pathological lies in that pathological liars are desperate to cope with their feelings of abandonment, abuse or rejection, often empty suicide threats or false accusations of others. Patients with borderline disorder do not feel rejected, they have high levels self-confidence that helps them lie successfully.

Unlike people with theatrical gifts, pathological liars are more dramatic. Narcissists, on the other hand, believe that they have achieved perfection and develop a sense of their own deification.

Mythomaniacs often do not show anti-social behavior, they often lie because they think their life is not interesting enough. The only diagnosis in our current system where aimless, internal deception is motivated by fake disorders. This diagnosis is often accompanied by hypochondria - patients lie about their fictitious physical or psychological disorders.

Psychotherapy is one of the few treatments for a person suffering from pathological lying. No study has been conducted in connection with the use pharmaceutical product to treat pathological liars. Some research suggests that patients may be prone to cheating. Long-term training with the help of psychotherapy methods is not able to lead to a regional increase in white matter volume and cause irreversible changes in brain chemistry. This approach is able to direct the patient in the necessary direction of thinking.

Pathological lying is a complex phenomenon, unlike other mental illnesses. It has many consequences for life and changes the quality of life of those who suffer from this pathology. Currently, there is not enough research into pathological lying to warrant a cure, but there is some hope.

Baron Munchausen syndrome: have you never heard of this? The name of a literary character in most people causes extremely positive emotions. And how about real people? Meeting with a similar person is clearly not a great pleasure.

What is a pathological lie and how to distinguish it?

Liars are very fond of telling fairy tales for their own benefit. Someone prefers to gain authority in this way. Why not? You can just flatter or tell interesting story, and no one will guess for sure that it was invented by a liar on the go. Is it possible to catch such a person in a lie? Of course, it's not difficult at all. Only here it will be very unpleasant for you, since the situation can turn against you.

An ordinary liar knows that he is telling a lie, but he does not always remember the details of the stories that he regularly voices. A completely different matter is pathological liars who invent their own castles in the air and, in fact, live in a fantasy world. Under the guise of revelations, they always present intriguing stories that evoke a lot of emotions.

Every person has enough adventures in life, but if the facts do not agree, this detail is very alarming. You involuntarily begin to think about what is happening, and eventually come to the conclusion: they are lying to me. A close friendship with a person suffering from Munchausen syndrome can be a real psychological trauma for a person who nevertheless decided on such a desperate act. Reality does not fit in with reality at all, and this begins to scare.

Signs of a pathological liar

Particular attention should be paid to signs that will help you easily identify a liar:

The same event is covered from the other side each time, more and more details appear. The interlocutor himself begins to get confused in names, events and details;

A person constantly lies, but on trifles. He can, allegedly not on purpose, name different cities, confuse the chronology of events, etc.;

If a pathological liar does not see anything terrible in his lies, he does not even strive to admit it at all;

The liar constantly evades the answer. He will get out until the last moment and try to come up with a new lie, any other plausible justification. Only now the interlocutor will no longer be able to believe, since the person managed to show his true face;

A liar is not shy about lying about severe illness his relatives and friends, he can tell nasty things about your mutual friend.

Discussions

pathological liar. Symptoms.

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pathological liar - psychological type personality; a person who often lies.

Most psychiatrists believe that this personality type is either the result of a psychiatric illness or low self-esteem.

1. By exaggerating his arguments to make them appear truthful, a liar can go to the extreme where the statements become ridiculous. The most remarkable thing is that he often does not notice the exaggerated extent of his statements.

2. The pathological liar loves to be the center of attention, so he will not hesitate to carry even more inconceivable nonsense in order to maintain interest in his person.

3. While the average person may find it difficult to maintain a prolonged eye contact The liar will pull it off with simple ease.

4. The tendency to lie is born at a young age; over the years, it becomes more and more difficult for a person to tell the truth.

5. Pathological lies are difficult to control. A careful observer will notice that the same story from the mouth of a liar changes from time to time.

6. Lies contradict themselves. This can be seen in the continuation of the stories heard earlier.

7. If you try to double-check the facts with questions, the pathological liar will instantly become defensive or attempt to change the subject.

8. Pathological liars are extremely impulsive, they always act "here and now", so the lies they reproduce are quite inconsistent.

9. And most importantly. Basically, liars believe that they are always right while everyone else is wrong, and it is this unshakable belief in their own rightness that drags them to the very bottom. They will object with fierce tenacity to the obvious.

Mythomania: what to do if you encounter a pathological liar?

It is probably safe to say that not a single person on our planet has ever met a lie in his life. Lies for profit, lies for salvation, the desire to avoid punishment by transferring it to others - all this is somehow familiar to a huge number of people. Both we ourselves and others use lies for their own purposes. However, there are individuals who, not only cannot live without lies, but also believe in it themselves. Such people are called pathological liars or liars.

Who are pathological liars?

Understanding who a pathological liar is is quite simple. Perhaps you have watched or read works about the so-called Baron Munchausen. This character was a lot of fiction - he flew on the core to the enemies and back, threw objects to the moon and got them out of there, climbing the stalks of peas. One of the most important characteristics of Munchausen was that he hated lies, and, therefore, considered all his stories to be pure truth. It is this important feature that is always inherent in pathological liars - they believe in what they say, most often offended or offended by the interlocutor if he tries to convict them of a lie. Therefore, you can often find a different name for this term, namely, the Munchausen complex. However, these names given mental condition is not limited. You may come across such terms as, for example, fantastic pseudology and mythomania, denoting the same pathological lie. The human condition that accompanies mythomania began to be actively discussed with the publication of the works of the French psychiatrist Ernest Dupre, who introduced this term more than a hundred years ago.

A person in a state of mythomania has special type personality or a special mental state that prompts him to do just that. Such a state does not appear in a person from nowhere, but is rooted in some deep psychological problems or injury. Most often, this behavior is associated with low self-esteem or childhood experiences. However, even the realization that this does not happen just like that does not alleviate the condition of people who are next to a person prone to lies.

How to spot a pathological liar?

In order to deal with the problem of chronic lying, you need to know what distinguishes this tendency to lie from ordinary lies. Decide this problem important, as a pathological liar can cause serious harm to your mental health. The closer this pathological liar is to you, the more difficult your experience will be. Serious damage can be done to you by close relatives, friends, colleagues and soulmates suffering from this disease.

And yet, how to recognize a pathological liar? First, you should listen carefully to his stories. It often happens that after a while a person may again begin to tell a story you already know. If you don't feel like waiting, you can just ask. At the same time, it is necessary to remember not only the essence of the story, but also less significant details. In the retelling of a liar, it is easy for an attentive listener to notice significant amount discrepancies and inconsistencies with what he told before. Such changes usually concern only small details and can change as many times as the number of times the liar repeats his story. This is especially striking, as it contrasts with the story itself, which usually, despite a bit of fantasy, at first glance may seem very convincing and plausible.

At the same time, the pathological lie of a person is sometimes found even in the most insignificant things, while he does not receive any benefit at all because of the lie. Also, such people are absolutely not shy about lying about serious things, such as someone's illness or death. Agree, it would be unpleasant for you to listen to false stories that some kind of misfortune happened to your friend, to worry about this.

important hallmark also a pathological liar is that he either considers his excessive lies to be normal, or does not recognize them at all. If you try to accuse him of lying, he will begin to dodge, come up with excuses and avoid confirmation in every possible way. Documents will be stolen or burned, and the witnesses of these events will magically be far away and “out of reach”. Most likely, they will even accuse you of distrust and try to shift the blame on you.

Reasons for this behavior

Pathological lies in itself are not considered any mental illness, most often manifested in a complex so-called personality disorder. Usually such a person does not understand at all that lying harms not only others, but also himself. How longer man lies, the more he gets entangled in the "web" of his own lies. Each time it will be more and more difficult for him to distinguish reality from fantasy, as he realizes himself as part of the fantastic reality he himself created. Perhaps initially a person does this consciously, afraid to meet the real world face to face or not wanting to accept himself as he is. However, in this case, the liar usually stops developing and improving himself, because he already has a much sweeter replacement. There is a growing difference between the real and the fictional image of himself, which only increases the reluctance of the liar to see himself as real.

It is believed that mythomania has its causes in childhood. Many children have a tendency to fantasize, and this is absolutely normal until mythomania grows out of a simple fantasy. The child may do this in order to get attention. However, this does not mean that excessive lying occurs only in children with a lack of attention. The desire to receive more and more interest in their person may also arise among those who received it in excess and developed inflated self-esteem. In general, it can be said that mythomania is closely related to various violations self-esteem. In adulthood, fears associated with the real world are often connected to this, an unwillingness to change one's life when it does not suit you, but simply hide behind lies like behind a screen. Such people usually suffer from an extensive list of various complexes, but at the same time they are not ready to deal with them on their own.

What to do if your friend is a pathological liar?

If you find that your friend has most of the signs of a pathological lie, do not rush to conclusions. Spotting pathological lies can be tricky, and you risk being wrong if you don't have enough evidence to draw any conclusions.

Immediately denounce a person, and even more so insult him - worst decision, because after that he will sink even deeper into his "shell". Therefore, you need to act with extreme caution.

However, you should not put up with the fact that a liar ruins your life. There are several tips that can help you coexist with a pathological liar. Most importantly, you need to stop taking the words of a liar for the truth. It is necessary, when listening to a person, to try to weed out the "wheat from the chaff", perceiving from him only that information that you yourself are able to verify. If his words on any issue are very important to you, check this information very carefully, and if it turned out to be false, do not read lectures and moralizing liar. You will waste your energy, having the risk of worsening your relationship with the liar. In the event that you decide to calmly discuss the problem and indicate to the liar that you are concerned about the current situation and want to help him, but he refuses to acknowledge the problem, do not try to develop this topic further. Most likely, your acquaintance will never dare to admit to himself that he has a tendency to deceive, and, therefore, will never change. If this does not suit you, if you do not want to be with such a person all your life, you will have to cut off all contacts and stop communicating. In case the liar does not recognize the problem, and such communication oppresses you, this is the only way out.

Of course, there are times when a person gradually realizes that he is lying and wants to get rid of it. How to help a person who lies to himself? Treatment of such problems should be carried out with a psychotherapist. Although there are no exact guarantees that pathological deceit will completely disappear, mythomania is treated only in this way, because no pills for lying have yet been invented.

pathological liar psychiatry

3. Where and by whom else is this concept used.

4. Your own understanding or interpretation of the concept, metaphors, useful interpretations

It seems interesting to me to discuss this term, since I have met several such people in my life. When the abyss of absolutely causeless lies was revealed, the question always tormented me - well, what the heck is it necessary, to make such a fuss? Well, okay, if there was a goal, I can still understand - everyone has a different morality, and it allows someone to lie because of self-interest. White lie is also an interesting angle, I think. Is it justified or not?

Pathological liar - a psychological type of personality; a person who often lies in an attempt to impress others.

This personality type was first described in medical literature over 100 years ago. Some psychologists believe that pathological liars differ from ordinary liars in that the pathological liar is confident that he is telling the truth and at the same time gets into character. Many, however, do not fully agree with such an interpretation, but agree that pathological lying is a special mental state. Although the term "pathological liar" is not used in clinical diagnosis, most psychiatrists believe that this personality type is either the result of a psychiatric illness or low self-esteem.

Scientists from the University of California at Los Angeles have shown that the brain of pathological liars differs from the norm in that in its prefrontal cortex there is a decrease in the volume of gray matter (neurons) and an increase in the volume of white matter (nerve fibers). These results indicate that the prefrontal cortex plays a role in this personality trait.

It is important to study cases of pathological lying and their causes, since the lies of witnesses can interfere with the investigation or cause wrong condemnation.

The story of the same event changes every time.

Lies and exaggerates not only significant events in life to give himself more importance, but also lies in everyday situations when it does not bring benefits.

Whatever you do, the pathological liar will tell you that he can do it better than you.

The truth has no value. Moral behavior is irrelevant.

He/she will defend and dodge when they are put against the wall. He has exceptional skills to dodge in any situation and transfer the blame to you.

He does not see anything wrong with the fact that he / she is lying. After all, it does no harm to anyone.

Never admit to lying. Can confess in a perverted form (in a way that doesn’t even look like a confession) only in exceptional cases: when exposure can really harm the family/work/life of a pathological liar. That is, to make an unloved reality even worse.

He often forgets what he has already lied to. For this reason, he often gives out opposite opinions, refutes himself.

Chameleonism - adapts to a stronger personality or to a person from whom something is needed. He tries to guess which of the answers you need, often does not have his own opinion.

“There is nothing sacred for this person” - he can lie about a fracture in a child, illness of a spouse, death in the family, etc. and so on. He takes advantage of the fact that a normal person will consider such a lie impossible and blasphemous - well, people don’t lie about such things!

Yes, there are such people, met.

Is there any way to stop lying?

3. Be trustworthy

2. Be patient

I had a period when the question "where have you been" I answered anything but the truth, even if I just went to the store for bread ..

Didn't want to be asked?

Didn't want to tell the truth?

If you lie all the time, then lying "on business" does not bother .. everyone is used to the fact that you are lying and do not panic

autistic people are not capable of lying,

pathological lies and profession

Ramil Garifulin "Psychology dangerous games and traps."

On trifles and in a big way, a person lies on average about 170 times a day. But sometimes, playing with the subconscious, he goes for broke, taking risks and falling into a trap.

One young man came to see a psychologist in an extremely nervous state. The essence of his problem is this.

To solve the urgent housing issue, he and his wife filed a fictitious divorce.

Do you think that person can be called a pathological liar? Sociopath?

1. Increase self-esteem

2. Do not ask (like not everyone loves, they want, they can tell the truth)

3. Be trustworthy

The people around me, I remember, did not like it very much.

But this is not a pathology, it is the choice of a means to achieve its goal.

2. Do not ask (like not everyone loves, they want, they can tell the truth)

3. Be trustworthy

2. Be patient

3. Be honest yourself, as frankly as possible

Shurik, well, you're just a pro))

Stop believing in his fables and fables, no matter how plausible they may seem. Question every word that comes out of his mouth.

Stop thinking that you hurt the feelings of this person with something and therefore he behaves this way. You have nothing to do with it, this is a disease. A pathological liar, due to his illness, does not suffer from remorse and does not think about how you feel, he does not care.

Kill the hope in yourself (and she dies last) that this person will become better.

Stop giving chances.

Emotionally break away, separate and not hope for change.

If possible, remove this person from yourself, cut off all channels of communication.

Catch your breath, rest and restore your world, in which white is still white.

Resist the temptation to put a pathological liar against the wall, as this is fraught with a deterioration in his mental state.

Remember that a pathological liar will never get used to the real world, it is easier for him to live in his castle in the air.

There is also such a phenomenon - the retelling of movies or books in the first person. And not always on behalf of the hero ..

This homework in Literature in primary school: Retell the story from the point of view of one of the characters a). b). V).

My son gets asked from time to time.

2. Deception for profit without causing harm. Here is an example: “I was late for work because my beloved aunt died,” a negligent subordinate lies with inspiration to the boss.

3. Deception without obvious benefit. Indeed, one can lie simply out of spite and envy: "Is she a beauty? Are you crazy! Don't you know that she has a wig and a false bust ?!"

4. Well-intentioned deception - this is how a doctor calms an incurable patient, a politician promises to get on the rails, and a husband swears never to cheat on his wife again.

5. A deceit that does not bring any obvious or hidden benefit to anyone - unless, of course, you count your own pleasure. This category of deception (or self-deception) includes harmless dreams and fantasies that each of us has indulged in at least once in our lives.

Where are these people to be taken? Lies to get attention?

I didn’t really understand the example - what does it mean to retell a movie or a book in the first person? Is it just telling a story, or is it a story that happened in the life of the narrator?

For example, a person talks about rest and holiday romance, but at the same time, instead of the real vacation date, he says that it was a year ago, instead of Egypt, he says that it was in Turkey, instead of real names, he says fictitious ones - is this a critical, significant lie? Or is it that such details are not important, because the story itself is true - about relaxation and a holiday romance?

A harmless lie - and the attitude of those around him.

Is it good when only fun is expected of you? And in serious cases, they don’t even take into account your presence? I think no. And it is for the dreamer.

Benefit, attracting attention, raising the mood of others.

Is it good when only fun is expected of you? And in serious cases, they don’t even take into account your presence? In all guises it would be good to show a banal sense of proportion. When a person is so serious and truthful that he will not lie even for the sake of a red word - it is also bad. He cuts the truth-womb when no one asks him about it. Will not be silent even for the sake of peace of mind loved one. Will not lie for salvation.

"He cuts when they don't ask" - this has nothing to do with truthfulness. It's just shamelessness, bad manners and lack of tact.

It is quite possible to be serious and truthful, and not even have a sense of humor and zero fantasy, but at the same time tactful, sympathetic to the kind.

This, of course, does not apply to pathological cases. when lies are caused by a mental disorder. You just need to be prepared for this and not take it to heart.

Uh. We're talking about pathology here. So how is it "not to take it to heart"? A person (especially if someone close) is SICK, and not to accept? Like we don't notice that you're suffering?

exactly. Therefore, the cutter can be a liar. or maybe just bullshit.

An ordinary trip to the store can be told as a thriller or a comedy.

from the phrase "well, you are a fool" said with a share of admiration, it is very easy to get "and she said about you that you are a fool" with a note of contempt

Maybe we won't confuse the word "storyteller" with a sick person?

Pathology is such a degree of dysfunction of the mental process that harms the owner. Otherwise, it would not be a pathology, but a variant of the norm.

In the case of lies, I believe that the pathology will be the inability of a person to control the flow of lies and the inability to recognize the boundaries at which this lie harms the social adaptation of the individual.

And it is easy to distinguish the truth from lies by checking. If you really need it.

Juggling is more of a manipulation than a pathology. I think so.

Pathological lie from "normal" is also not easy to distinguish EXACTLY, because. the motives are not fully understood (they are often conjectured by the perceiver).

The key could be telepathic abilities perceiver. But first you need to understand why, in fact, really? :confused:

the psychological comfort of both sides is achieved both by truth and by untruth, and not always at the expense of others.

psychological discomfort is also provided by both. according to circumstances.)

There are people whose thinking is sharpened for benefit, for them the result is important, not the form.

There are people whose thinking is sharpened by fantasies, and they are real for them.

There are people whose thinking is imprisoned for speaking (no matter what), their lies cannot be distinguished from the truth at all.

If there are methods of diagnosis, then there must be methods of treatment. If it's psychiatric treatment, it's medication. I wonder who and what knows about it. Apparently, psychotherapeutic treatment (conversations) should also take place. Funny, I haven't run into this. It would be interesting to know.

1. When someone is asked something, people who have hidden a stone in their bosom usually get off with very short and concise explanations. To recognize a lie, you need to try to talk a person.

2. It should be remembered that, although malefactors are taciturn, they often spontaneously try to justify their practical silence even when they are not prompted to do so.

3. Note also that deceivers and those who have something to hide tend to repeat the question each time before answering it. This, perhaps, is necessary for them to buy time when considering deception.

4. Those who hide their true aims and intentions often pay close attention to the questioner's reaction. It is understandable - I wonder what kind of reaction a false story causes?

5. Professional liars, as they work out their version and to study the reaction of the investigator, slow down speech at first, but then shoot out words when the “fable” is invented.

After all, they know that "mooing" arouses suspicion. Normal, truthful people don't have this - they don't have to care how they talk - fast or slow.

6. Liars, unlike those who do not lie, use fragmentary phrases more often in speech: they begin to answer, then suddenly break off the phrase, returning to the beginning, and, as a rule, do not finish it.

7. When an unpleasant question is raised, citizens who have something to hide are likely to purse their lips, start stroking their hair, and generally tend to perform similar “body care” actions.

If a person is lying, he is more likely to gesticulate with his hands in the direction of himself. If not, then the gestures go from him, outward.

8. People who have nothing to hide when asked for details often deny they are lying and offer more explanation.

Liars usually stand their ground without offering further clarification.

9. Upon hearing a difficult question, truthful people usually turn away in order to concentrate on understanding it.

Liars, as a rule, turn away only for a moment, or try not to move at all, unless, of course, the issue requires maximum concentration.

10. In order to verify the authenticity of what is told, it is necessary to force the narrators to repeat the whole story, starting from the end and not missing the nuances, repeating the smallest details.

Such a request undermines the liar's position: even a professionally trained deceiver experiences a severe load on the brain, since he has to strictly follow the version presented earlier while monitoring the listener's reaction.

The series "Theory of Lies" is generally built according to this technique)

I liked it very much. I think that's the way it is.

I just read it now, sorry.

Like "I'm walking through a wonderful forest and suddenly I see."

Maybe it's just that fantasies do not aim to put yourself in some other light ("I'm the coolest", "I'm the sexiest", "I'm the most miserable") IN FRONT OF OTHERS.

They are fantasies either for themselves - why not dream? or as in creativity - not about yourself, but about some other people, events, situations.

The word "lying" has a negative connotation - deceiving others in the name of one's own needs. And when a person ceases to control himself in this matter - then pathology.

Damn, how do you manage to write in two windows on the Mosaic. I confuse windows all the time

in the sense of connection fiction for children and this topic where?

The one who speaks the truth everywhere and everywhere will quickly get into trouble.

The truth is no less pathological, in this case.

Moreover, as far as I know this mental disorder physiologically determined. That is reflected in the functioning of the brain.

And to define, I think, the expert should.

Hello! I've been asking myself this question for a long time now. I was amazed how similar your situation is to mine! It's like you're writing about me. But then I saw on other forums that the scenario is almost always the same 🙂 It's strange that I can't find normal recommendations from psychologists and psychotherapists. On Russian-language sites, nothing but what has already been mentioned on this forum. I'll look for foreign ones. If I find anything, I will definitely write to you. In the meantime, I wish you patience and wisdom. I can not agree that you just need to leave such a person. Moreover, as it turns out, this is still a pathology, at least, the reasons for this are mental disorders / injuries. You just need to learn to live with it, learn how to behave in the right way. crisis situations- and they will be like any patient.

I would advise you to be careful.

Although it probably sounds trite)). Be attentive to yourself and to him. Stop judging, comparing with what “should be”, and making judgments.

By condemning, it is impossible to help anyone.

Try to put your patterns, beliefs and expectations (all your neuroticism)) aside in order to be closer to this person. To do this, you need to be attentive to yourself and your reactions. become. Mmm. as "quiet" (deep) as possible).

Who do you see looking at him? Do you see "sick, deceitful, pathological"? "Source of problems" and nothing more? I don't think you are careful enough. Take a closer look, there must be something else, good. maybe not very bright. human? Likes animals, drawing, reading books, listening to music, cooking? What interests him, excites him, attracts him? Try to find it, notice and. estimate. And not once, but whenever possible every time you notice. Become attentive to these parts of it, appreciate them, savor and even admire them! For some reason, those who resent bad things. it's so bad to admire the good))

Try to stop being an opponent and a judge, get off the top position. to, if possible, become close, on one level, as if to take by the hand. let only in your inner world. Maybe you will be able to become someone with whom he will not need to lie, puff up and create some kind of beautiful appearance. And he will get such a rare precious opportunity in the company of you just to be himself. albeit imperfect. as it is. Look at yourself from the outside, without lies, without defenses and at the same time without hurting your self-esteem.

If it works out. then it will be possible for you to convey something to him, and for him to hear you. Then you can invite him into your world and show him from the outside how his actions are perceived by other people, and he will be able to go with you where he has never been. and where I would never go myself.

For any of us, this is possible only if we are held by the hand))

I think this is what can be called "help". Well, or if you want "treatment".

Pathological lies as a mental illness

Pathological lies, which in medicine are referred to as "fantastic pseudology" or Munchausen's syndrome, are considered to be not a separate mental illness, but a complex disorder that has complex structure. Pathology can be temporary (from several months) or last a lifetime. Scientists have proven that the disease is not a consequence of epilepsy, insanity or dementia of a person. Pathological lying should be taken as part of a general mental disorder, and not as a separate phenomenon. To date, only psychologists are engaged in the treatment of such a deviation.

The pathological liar tries to pass off fiction as reality in order to put himself in the best light in front of others. Over time, he himself begins to believe in his lies. The world in which there are liars does not fit in with reality.

Until now, doctors cannot come to a consensus about how much a pathological liar can control his inventions and whether this person can be recognized as fully capable.

Scientists have proven that the emergence of fantastic pseudology has anatomical reasons. Studies have confirmed that the amount of gray matter (neurons) in the brain of a pathological liar is 14% less, and the content of nerve fibers exceeds the average volume by 22%, compared with a normal person. Such an excess weakens moral restraint and gives impetus to fantasy.

In addition, the causes of mental disorder can be caused by the costs of education in childhood.

The child may have experienced:

• insults and humiliation from parents or peers;
• lack of parental attention and love;
• excessive praise, which led to the desire to constantly be in the spotlight;
• unrequited first love;
• non-perception of the opposite sex in adolescence.

The appearance of a tendency to pathological lies already in an adult is often associated with traumatic brain injuries. Pathological lies are characteristic of people with low self-esteem, and therefore, with the help of lies, they want to assert themselves in society and show their importance to others. Lies often become a characteristic mask behind which a person tries to hide the feeling of his worthlessness and failure.

Not the last role in the development of the disorder is played by hereditary predisposition a person in the presence of a relative with a similar deviation in the family.

Some scientists argue that pathological lying is a characteristic behavior for alcoholics and drug addicts, and people suffering from sociopathy, narcissism and psychopathism constantly resort to it.

The pathological liar is different hysterical type personality and therefore seeks to be in the spotlight with the help of constant lies.

An adult suffering from this disorder is characterized by mental immaturity, that is, he cannot foresee the consequences of his fantasy. Constant desire admiration for one's personality, which is not achieved by real actions, does not allow the pathological liar to realize that his lie is easily exposed.

There are a number characteristic symptoms, by which it is possible to identify a pathological liar:

1. 1. When telling about the same story from life, a person constantly confuses details, sequence of events, names actors and dates. Moreover, in a new company, the story from the lips of a liar sounds different every time.
2. 2. When presenting arguments, a liar constantly exaggerates them in order to prove their truthfulness, which ultimately comes to complete absurdity and absurdity. Often such a person himself is not aware of the meaninglessness of the above.
3. 3. The pathological liar tries to embellish even the details without any benefit to himself.
4. 4. For a pathological liar, there are no moral principles, so he can easily invent a story about a terrible illness or death of someone close to him.
5. 5. Such a person does not consider his fantasies reprehensible with a slight upset or does not admit to lying at all under any circumstances.
6. 6. A pathological liar cannot be brought to clean water, he will play up and dodge, come up with new arguments that cannot be verified or proven. As a result, his tactics will turn into an attack - he will begin to put pressure emotionally, proving his case and accusing others of disbelief.
7. 7. Emotional condition changes when the same story is told in different settings.
8. 8. When a person constantly lies, he forgets many details of the previous story, so each time he gives completely opposite arguments, refuting himself.
9. 9. Pseudologists operate on the principle of "here and now", so the stated fiction is inconsistent.
10. 10. A pathological liar always adapts to the person from whom he expects benefits. He tries to predict the right answer to the question posed, without expressing his own opinion.
11. 11. Such individuals always defend their fictitious arguments and are completely sure that they are right.
12. 12. A liar with any unfamiliar person can maintain prolonged eye contact.

The manifestation of at least a few of these symptoms indicates a mental disorder. Normal reaction healthy person is the desire to wean, re-educate, or otherwise influence the pathological liar. However, such methods are unsuccessful.

In psychiatry and psychology there is no special diagnostics similar condition. The detection of pathology largely depends on the person's own recognition of the presence of mental problems at the psychologist's office. In Russia, no additional surveys a person for the presence of Munchausen syndrome, the diagnosis is made solely on the basis of the observations of a psychiatrist.

In the US, a method has been developed to detect liars. For this, a special examination of the brain for the content of gray and white matter in the patient is carried out. In the presence of deviations from the norm, it is possible to identify a person's tendency to pathological lies.

It is not possible to treat such a pathology. But if a person has strong desire to improve and suppress the tendency to lie, it is recommended to visit a psychologist who will help overcome this negative character trait. But sessions should be regular. If a person interrupts therapy too soon, everything will resume.

Psychologist's advice on how to behave ordinary people in contact with a pathological liar:

• you should not waste your strength on re-educating a liar, as this will not have any effect;
• when communicating, you need to question each fact or argument stated by him;
• if possible, it is better to emotionally distance yourself from such a person;
• you should not try to catch him in a lie and prove the truth, as this will provoke an even greater psychological disorder of the liar.

It should be understood that a pathological liar lives exclusively in his illusions.

Pathological lie as an addiction

The statement “lying is not good” is irrelevant for a pathological liar. Yes, it turns out that there are people who constantly tell lies and at the same time feel the need to behave in this way. But pathological deceit, or pseudology (from the Greek pseudos lie and iogos word, teaching) should not be confused with deceit for the sake of profit, flattery or other selfish motives. Dependence on one's own lies is a pathological tendency to invent and report to others about fictional events, successes and adventures from one's own life in order to attract attention and elevate oneself above the rest. For example, a person may talk about getting a high position, buying an expensive car, flying to Cuba, etc. Pathological lies about oneself are much less common in negative light(self-talk).

The main difference between pathological deceit and ordinary deceit is that in the first case, a person gradually gets used to the role himself and begins to believe in his own lies. Although not all psychologists agree with this opinion, everyone unanimously classifies pseudology as a special mental disorder. Life next to a pathological liar or forced regular communication with him becomes a real nightmare for normal honest people. But can this behavior be changed? Let's try to understand everything in order.

Signs of pathological deceit

Dependence on incessant lies is usually considered not as a separate behavioral pathology, but as part of a general psychological personality disorder. The pathological liar does not realize the damage he can do to himself and his environment by constantly lying about himself. Moreover, in addition to using lies, he does many things unconsciously, and some signs give him away:

• the message about the same event is constantly changing, acquiring new, often contradictory details;
• inconsistency in the presentation of events and facts, due to the impulsive nature;
• exaggeration not only significant facts from life, but also lies over trifles;
• absolute confidence in one's rightness;
• defense, aggressiveness and resourcefulness in case his lies are revealed; the ability to transfer the blame to the one who brought to clean water;
• non-recognition of one's own lies, or recognition in exceptional situations when the deceit significantly threatens personal well-being;
• adjusting to a person from whom any benefit is needed and lack of one's own opinion;
• "blasphemous" lies: about the death of a loved one, serious illness child, car accident, etc.

Reaction ordinary person in the fantasy of a liar, it is always expressed in resentment and indignation. But the pathological liar does not at all seek to offend anyone: he just wants to be talked about and discussed about his life. Often he himself believes in his lie, but the one that wears positive character(career success, winnings, etc.)

Causes of pathological deceit

Pathological deceit in an adult is rooted in childhood. Of course, many at a tender age like to fantasize, but this is good until it oversteps all boundaries and begins to create difficulties with mutual understanding with parents and friends.

Children who are prone to lying do things to get attention. Often this is the behavior of children who, with full financial support, lack parental affection and care. Or, on the contrary, the child was constantly praised, not even on business, which developed an inflated self-esteem and a desire to “build” others around him, to be constantly in the spotlight.

In adulthood, often pathological lies are due to the masking of one's own shortcomings. So, a man who tells everyone about his dizzying successes in his career is actually a lazy person and a parasite, and a woman who does not enjoy the attention of the opposite sex claims that she is showered with compliments and gifts. In this case, complexes and fears are usually hidden behind the facade of a lie, a lie becomes a kind of psychological defense.

Diagnosis and treatment of pathological deceit

In general, it is not possible to correct and cure a pathological liar, because strictly speaking pseudology is not a mental disorder, but a negative personality trait. And the problem here is much deeper than it might seem.

There is no special diagnosis of pathological deceit in our country. The identification of this feature of behavior is possible at a reception with a psychologist, and then, if the person himself is aware of how he behaves.

In the United States, there is a special method of studying the brain, which can reveal a tendency to unbridled lies. So, in pathological liars in the prefrontal cortex of the brain, the volume of neurons (gray matter) is reduced and the volume of nerve fibers (white matter) is increased, compared to the norm. Thus, the structure of the prefrontal cortex of the brain influences a person's susceptibility to telling lies.

There is no cure for addiction to one’s own lies, and even more so, there are no drugs that “force” a person to be honest. And opinions about whether a person can improve, psychologists differ. On the one hand, it is real if a person himself is aware of the perniciousness of his behavior and wants to change, but on the other hand, it is impossible, because the structure of the brain cannot be changed. Sessions of psychotherapeutic help, in which a person learns to find the reasons for his lies and understand himself, can only provide a short-term effect. And then the liar will again take up the old.

But what about those who have to constantly or periodically contact with a pathological liar? A few tips should help you communicate:

• Don't try to raise a liar. It is useless to influence him with arguments and moralizing.
• Stop believing in all his stories and questioning every phrase.
• Move away emotionally from the liar and not expect positive changes.
• Do not try to tear off the mask from him - this will only aggravate his psychological state.
• Stop communicating with this person and cut off all the threads that bind you, if possible.
• Remember that a pathological liar will never accept reality as it is and will continue to live in illusions and untruths.