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At a certain point, girls want to become more independent, build their own relationships, but many of them are afraid of the process of growing up. How can a girl grow up psychologically, and at the same time not disturb her way of life?

Causes of emotional immaturity

Like it or not, but the issue of emotional maturity affects every person, regardless of gender and rhythm of life. The process of growing up occurs individually, and often psychological age man clearly does not correspond to the physical.

IN modern world most of the fair sex are too spoiled, and therefore for a long time consider themselves the standard of correct behavior only. In the thoughts of such girls there are only own desires, opinions and needs.

At the very first situation, when problems get out of control, there is a certain resentment and disappointment due to the fact that desires did not coincide with opportunities. At the same time, there is a certain anger at the outside world and the people around. Only those ladies who timely think about the significance of not only their person, but also about other people will be able to get out of this situation.

With the wrong upbringing, a failed society and bad examples in the surrounding society, the girl becomes the main focus of resentment and injustice, which, oddly enough, are hidden in her.

Various kinds of rebellion and attempts to prove one's case at any cost can become clear sign emotional immaturity.

Adults with the psychology of children are those individuals who in childhood suffered from misunderstanding, distrust, lack of attention and ridicule. In this case, it is very important for the girl to understand that no one can correct the situation except herself, therefore, it is necessary to take the first steps towards psychological maturity as soon as possible. How to grow up a girl, where to start?

First steps towards maturity

Unfortunately, most young ladies are sure that in order to become more mature, you need to spend more time on your own or in noisy adult companies, smoke and look like an adult. However, this is the biggest misconception that just needs to be realized in time. The main sign of a woman growing up is her character, demeanor, the ability to control her emotions, as well as a sense of responsibility.

The second thing you need to pay attention to is the assessment of your own shortcomings and merits. At the same time, it is necessary to learn how to soberly assess the problems and find the really guilty in this situation. Oddly enough, but most often the problem lies in ourselves.

The ability to prioritize, know your own price and make decisions deliberately - these are the main criteria for psychological maturity. For example, a person chooses his friends and circle of friends. At the same time, emotional mature personality, being in a certain society, will be able to draw conclusions about whether this society is really suitable. A huge plus is the fact that, unlike a child, such a mature individual has freedom of choice, but at the same time, carefully monitors the whole situation.

Of course, one cannot do without the desire to be financially independent. The ability to provide for oneself a living, to engage in a favorite hobby, and so on - this main step toward an adult and independent life. No matter how trite it may sound, but the ability to cope with everyday life and standard problems is one more step. Psychological maturity is not only emotional condition human, but also physical.

The ability to cook, clean, cope with the house, with children, adapt to the world around us and problems, as well as join any team are necessary skills for the life of any person.

Prepare yourself mentally for serious problems And real life, you can more confidently stand on your feet and materialize yourself in this life. If a girl owns her internal resources, emotions, feelings, as well as the support of others, then you can safely go forward adult life and not be afraid of the future. At the same time, the question of how to grow up for a woman, girl or guy will no longer seem so difficult. Self-confidence, willingness to act and determination is the main key to success, personal development and adulthood.

The main thing is to pick up this key in time and not remain forever a small child in your soul. After all, appearance does not betray age, but mental attitude, thinking and emotional maturity.

Video "How to grow up fast?"

Psychologist's advice to help you cope with emotional immaturity and grow up quickly.

But if you are tired of valuable instructions, then it makes sense to take some steps.

Look at your passport.

How old are you? Does this tell you something? You feel like an adult and independent person? Or are you still Small child? Or rather, a person who is stuck in childhood and will not get out of this state in any way.

If you decide to grow, then make a decision now.

And gradually you will become more mature, wiser, more confident, smarter, more conscious. You cannot be an adult today and a child again tomorrow, because it is beneficial for you. It turns out the game. And the game will not work in relationships with loved ones. So grown up - so grown up!

Play around with this solution for a few days.

Try not to communicate with your parents these days so that they do not bring down your plans. Until the decision to grow up takes root inside and no complete confidence, you are very easy to return back to "childhood". Do not consult with friends. If they are as insecure as you are, then this insecurity will be transferred to you, and any desire to change anything will disappear.

When you feel the strength in yourself to enter into a dialogue with your parents, then at their first attempt to “educate” you, tell them calmly and confidently: “I don’t like the way you talk to me, and I ask you not to do this again.” Or the phrase that you want to say. No excuses, no explanations, no panic. The first reaction to your words will be different. From surprise to anger. The main thing is not to get into an argument. And don't panic.

If they keep talking to you like a child, then you just pick up and leave without explanation. You can say at the same time that you love them very much, but you don’t want to talk in that tone. At first, they will not understand that you have changed and are no longer a child. But over time, it will come to them that their child has grown up and does not need their control and guardianship.

If you are dependent on your parents financially, and this is the reason that you have to endure their attitude towards you, then find a way to become independent and independent.

If fears, complexes, insecurities interfere, then look inside yourself, ask what prevents you from growing up. Accept yourself as you are now - insecure, small, cowardly. Taking your inner child you let him help you.

The inner child is not only cowardly and insecure. He is also a magician, inventor, sociable, creative, courageous. Self-acceptance and self-love will decorate life and help in difficult situations.

Realizing your internal states, you will “release them to the surface” at the right time. During sports, entertainment, recreation. When you are afraid of yourself and do not love, then these unloved inner children show up in inappropriate situations, and it looks out of place. Then when it is just necessary to be serious and adult.

Learn to take care of yourself inner world and not just the people around you.

See that most of your thoughts about yourself are the thoughts and beliefs of your parents. And they have nothing to do with you personally. It is, rather, their personal unresolved complexes. And you can't help them. You can only accept your parents as they are. Even if they don't do it to you. For the simple reason that you are more aware than they are.

If you are persistent, consistent, confident, then everything will work out. I want awareness! And easy growing up :)

Good day, dear readers. Today we will answer the question of how to mature psychologically. You will learn what signs characterize a mature person, find out what may indicate immaturity. Check out valuable advice regarding this issue.

The difference between an adult and a child

Has behind life experience knows a lot about real life.
Able to restrain emotions when in public.
He understands that it is necessary to behave culturally, because he is a conscious member of society.
Responsible for his own life, as well as for his loved ones.
He doesn't depend on anyone, he is his own support.

Criteria of psychological maturity and signs of immaturity

In the modern world, there is an illusion that the stage of growing up is bad, it is better to stay in childhood as long as possible. In fact, it's long past time for many people to get rid of their rose-colored glasses and realize that childhood is over and there are many benefits to adulthood. Various opportunities open up before an adult, he can make certain plans and make his dreams come true.

According to a number psychological research maturity criteria are:

the ability to constructively interact with the outside world;
responsibility for what happens;
unwillingness to shift their guilt or mistakes onto someone;
ability to resist psycho-emotional stress, deal with it;
the opportunity to realize themselves in professional activities;
the ability to understand other people, to feel love for them;
possibility of acceptance rational decisions, thoughtful and balanced.

A person who meets the above criteria is a psychologically adult person. If there is infantilism, then this individual is stuck in childhood.

If we consider psychological immaturity, then there are a number of signs that characterize this state.

Indecision. Faced with a problem, the individual cannot make a choice, he is afraid of possible mistakes.
Irresponsibility. A person constantly shifts to someone making decisions, especially the most important ones in his life. He does this in order to get rid of responsibility for possible consequences.
Excessive pity for oneself, the need to blame everyone around, but not oneself. To such an individual, the world seems unfair. A person begins to blame all his problems in adulthood on his parents.
categorical judgments. If adults can respond flexibly to various events, then a person who is still psychologically immature begins to divide the world into black and white, there is confidence that his own position is correct, and the opinion of other people is wrong.

How to grow up

Try to come to terms with the "child" that lives in your soul, leave it in the past. It is known that a person who childhood moved some psychological trauma, remains a "child" for a long time, he is sure that it is easier to live this way. Over time, the mask of the "baby" merges with the image of the individual. Then on the face of manifestation, fear of acceptance own decisions, inability to sensibly assess actions, constant escaping from responsibility. In this case, a person must realize that he has already grown up, that he has other needs, and one must forget about that “child” that is hidden somewhere deep.
Analyze your family history. There are cases when a person who was brought up in a too authoritarian family cannot grow up, he was not given the opportunity to make decisions. When such an individual grows up, he does not know how to be an adult and responsible. In such situation The best decision seek help from a psychologist who will help you realize that the time has come to grow up and take responsibility, becomes independent.
Realize that it is unacceptable to avoid problems, to constantly run away from them. You have already grown up and must make decisions on your own, faced with difficulties, solve them.
Get rid of . Learn to be flexible in dealing with different people.
Learn to take responsibility. This is the first criterion for growing up. As an adult, you need to know what you want from life, what you need to do in order to get a result. It is necessary to understand that if you take responsibility for yourself, you save other people from making your decisions. Naturally, there was a time when everyone important questions decided instead of you by your parents. Now the moment has come when you yourself must make your choice.
Learn to do everything yourself. It is necessary to understand that adults are able to take care of themselves. A girl at the age of 18 should already know at least the basic principles of how to cook food, it is desirable that a guy at that age also knows how to take care of himself, and it is desirable to provide. Don't rely on someone else to help. It is worth considering such situations when a girl who devoted herself to a child and family, did housework, never worked, at some point she remains alone, for example, her husband leaves her. What then remains for her to do, and even one with children? You need to grow up in time and not hope that in which case someone will help.
Pay attention to those around you. It must be understood that the environment greatly affects human behavior. But do not think that people who drink alcohol or those who smoke will help grow up. No, here we are talking about the adults self-sufficient people who know what they want from life and strive to achieve their goals.
Parents may wonder how to grow up a girl, if their daughter sits on their neck and does not want to do anything, move on, as they say, well settled. You need to understand that such behavior is unacceptable, that the young lady needs to decide what she wants to achieve in life. Perhaps in this moment no hobbies, no interest in any work. So it's time to find yourself. It is important to decide on a field of activity that will be interesting, and start working in this direction.
Set achievable goals for yourself. After completing them, move on to the aspirations that will take longer to achieve. Never stop there, keep moving forward.
Learn to take care of yourself and your loved ones.
Learn to plan your day, distribute important and not so important things, learn to control your financial situation, be sure to devote time to sports, proper nutrition and healthy sleep.

When you realize that you are not psychologically mature, you should understand that you have a very long and hard work ahead of you, which will not be done in one day, it may take a week, or even a month. The main thing is to set yourself this goal and go towards its achievement, do not break under the difficulties that arise.

Now you know how to mature a guy or a girl psychologically. As you can see, quite a lot of representatives of today's youth continue to remain in "childhood", at times they do not want to grow up consciously. However, it should be understood that this process is necessary. A person must grow up, develop, take responsibility. Over time, when children appear, you will have to become a mentor for them, a person from whom you need to take an example. Therefore, it is very important to be able to become an adult, not only externally, but also psychologically.

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Can a girl achieve harmony and contentment own life not knowing how to mature psychologically and navigate an updated deeper understanding of happiness? IN a certain moment already . It is quite natural that a girl wants to build her own relationships with friends and members of the opposite sex. But how to break out of the usual rut, which just recently provided comfort and a sense of happiness?

How to mature psychologically: the causes of emotional infantilism

The need for psychological maturation awaits almost every girl who is used to considering herself a spoiled girl. Is it any wonder that such a person does not even allow the thought of her own insolvency and the right of other people to a personal (sometimes unpleasant for her) opinion. She considers only herself and her own interests to be the standard of correct assessment and justice. Similar when circumstances are contrary to her desires. unable to recognize own mistakes and internally improve, the girl considers the world hostile and unfair. From such a situation, only those girls who are aware of the significance of not only their own person, but also other people will be able to emerge victorious.

Psychological maturation will also save a young woman who takes revenge for insults and injustice (the cause of which, in fact, lies in herself). Her rebelliousness and inner dissatisfaction comes down to attempts to prove her own innocence at all costs. Otherwise, the girl shows aggression and tries to do it in spite of others, thereby only.

Understanding the inevitability of prohibitions (as the main condition for organizing life and life) that ensures the harmonious coexistence of different individuals and their safety in society will psychologically help such a girl grow up.

In addition, psychological children often remain those girls who from childhood were suppressed and ridiculed by parents, teachers or peers. Here the cause of the problem is hidden in the desire to remain in the shadows and the habit of not relying on one's own opinion. Their infantilism lies in the subconscious fear of making decisions and seeking encouragement from other people for their own actions. Such individuals often follow the lead of those who are confident in themselves, and are easily influenced by outside influences. Only the awareness of their own value as a unique personality will help them grow up psychologically. Very and not afraid to be the center of attention, as well as without resorting to conflict.

How to grow up psychologically for a girl: the first steps

Finding solutions that tell a girl how to mature psychologically is not about addiction to alcohol, smoking or physical proximity with an older partner. A sign of growing up is noticeable in the character of a person, his manner of behaving and taking responsibility.

In addition to the desire to become an adult, the young lady will have to realize herself as independent and psychologically mature. Others no less important aspect is Objective assessment its merits and demerits. Here already: it's time to unravel the intricacies of circumstances.

Psychological maturation is also characterized by the girl's ability to prioritize when she knows her own worth, makes independent decisions, evaluates the prospect and chooses friends. Unlike a child, such a person has inner freedom, but keeps himself in the iron grip of self-discipline. However, not only does the matured girl stand out, but also concern for others, the desire for material independence.

To become an adult, you often have to change your usual understanding of the world and your own beliefs. Psychological maturity includes the ability to cook, cope with children, adapt to the environment, join the team and work. If you make efforts to learn, master certain skills and dexterity, the harsh conditions of fate will not seem too painful.

If a girl is able to mobilize internal resources to overcome fear in the absence of support from others, then you can not be afraid of the future. And readiness for decisive actions with a sober assessment of the situation is Right way from a gloomy dead end to success and self-recognition as a person. And feel comfortable in human society the girl will be helped by the ability to understand people, forgive mistakes and.