Pathological liar psychology. Mythomania: what causes pathological deceit

First, let's define the terminology.

Pathology (from the Greek pathos - suffering, pain, illness and logos - study) - painful deviation from normal condition or development process.

The concept of “lie” is more difficult. This is a very common communicative phenomenon in everyday life, which includes a variety of situations and tactics and has been given so many definitions and interpretations that it would be enough for several dozen articles, but in general these definitions are similar to each other.

A lie is a statement that is obviously not true and expressed in this form consciously, with the aim of creating or maintaining in another person a belief that the transmitter himself considers contrary to the truth.

A lie is a deliberate attempt, made without warning, either successfully or unsuccessfully, to formulate in another person a belief that the communicator considers to be false.

A lie is a deliberate distortion of the actual state of affairs in order to mislead another person.

Attempts to systematize types of lies are not without interest. Thus, according to McCornack, a lie, which is a manipulation of the quantity or quality of information, is divided into:
1. Conscious manipulation of the amount of information transmitted (well explains deception or concealment).
2. Transmission of ambiguous, vague information.
3. Silence – hiding the truth (minimization).
4. Distortion – communication of false information, also – fabrication, falsification (maximization).

The quality of a lie is closely related to the emotions experienced by the liar, such as guilt, fear, delight in being “deceived” - a feeling of omnipotence, shame.

Pathological deceit, also known as “fantastic pseudology” (pseudologia fantastica) and “Munchausen syndrome”, is understood as falsification of very complex structure, extensive in time (from several years to whole life), which is not caused by dementia, insanity and epilepsy. Pathological lying should be viewed as part of an underlying psychological personality disorder rather than as a separate fault. It should be noted that this disorder is one of the most controversial subjects in today's world of psychology. The consequences of pathological lying can be the most unpredictable for both the victim of deception and the liar himself.

Pathological liar psychological type personalities; a person who often lies in an attempt to impress others. Such people are also called pseudologists or mythomaniacs. IN medical literature this personality type was first described more than 100 years ago. There are more pathological liars than we think, and they are found not only in cliched plots of Hollywood films. Similar characters may end up among your relatives, friends, acquaintances, colleagues, or anywhere. And although the name of the literary character Baron Munchausen does not evoke unpleasant associations, meeting a pathological liar in real life only brings Negative consequences, because The pathological liar himself is destructive by nature. The reality in which the pseudologue exists does not fit in with the usual reality. Events happen there that cannot actually happen. They will assure you that black is white, and vice versa, and if you try to figure it out, they will cause you a scandal or a boycott.

There is still debate about how much a pathological liar can control his lies, and, therefore, whether such a person can be considered fully capable.

Scientists from the University of California have demonstrated that pathological lying also has a physical basis: the brains of pathological liars differ from the norm in that their prefrontal cortex (this part of the brain is associated with both learning moral behavior and the feeling of remorse) is 14% reduced in volume gray matter(neurons) and volume increased by 22% white matter (nerve fibers). Gray matter consists of brain cells, and white matter is like a “connecting wire” between them. Excess white matter increases the ability of pathological liars to lie (they find it much easier to do the difficult work of fantasy) and weakens their moral restraint. Our morality and model of correct behavior are not obligatory for them, although in childhood these people were taught that lying is wrong, just like everyone else.

Experts attribute the occurrence of this disorder to a number of traumatic events that happened to a person in childhood. This may be constant humiliation and criticism from adults, lack of love from parents, unrequited first love or rejection by the opposite sex, which leads to low self-esteem during growing up. Sometimes the same disorder can appear in adulthood after a traumatic brain injury. The possibility of transferring such properties by inheritance cannot be ruled out.

Many researchers consider pathological deceit as an integral attribute of severe “social” diseases, such as drug addiction and alcoholism. Pathological liars often also include people with narcissism, psychopathism and sociopathy.

A pathological liar usually has hysterical type personality. Such a person strives to be the center of attention in any way, and his lies are one of the ways to achieve his goal. Such people are often mentally immature and, like children, do not see the consequences of their actions. Constant need to arouse a feeling of respect unjustified by factual circumstances, combined with the moral defects of the mythomaniac, gives rise to a reluctance to realize and admit that a lie can easily be exposed.

At the same time, practice shows that the overwhelming majority of pathological liars are quite sane and capable of answering for their words.

Telling fantastic stories to make oneself feel important is a behavior typical of four to six year olds. Having met him with someone his own age, an adult gets lost and... sometimes believes what he is told. Firstly, it is difficult to imagine that an over-aged, apparently an adequate person I made up a story from start to finish with so many details. Secondly, a pathological liar may look absolutely sincere: he himself has long believed in what he is saying. Some part of his consciousness is aware that the events described did not happen, but it is blocked.

Here's how one woman describes her six-month relationship with a pathological liar:
“When we meet, he will claim that he is not married and has no children. But later he may confess to you that he was once married and has a 7-year-old child. In fact, dear women, he has 3 children, a second marriage, and lives with his wife. And will you trust him in his “honesty”, because... He disguises himself very well, his speech is well practiced, his stories are all prepared in advance. There will be pressure on pity that he is alone, unhappy, no one loves him, his ex-wife is a brute, and he is a victim. That he wants to build a family, a house, have a baby and blah blah blah. He will lie to you that he has a 3-room apartment and will soon sell it and move to live with you. He will easily meet all your relatives, parents and nothing will falter. He can also calmly introduce you to his friends, but these are usually not close ones, but fellow migrant workers. He will be very kind and generous with you, gifts, endless SMS, calls, confessions that you are “the very best”, in general, not a man - an ideal. But don't believe him! He is an ordinary immoral type, for whom nothing is sacred, he deceived me for half a year, deceived his pregnant wife. He will tell you jokes and stories that you can later find on the Internet, but he will assure you that this happened to him. He will also come up with speeches for others. For example, that his mother knows about you and in general he will soon introduce you to her. He may hint to you about getting married soon and even offer to try on Wedding Dress. He will be glad if you give birth to a child for him, and later he will simply hide, because... children mean nothing to him. He's just a lustful dog who will seduce you into different kinds sex. Dear girls, just don’t agree to these persuasion!”

Typical signs of a pathological liar:

– The story about one event changes from time to time. A liar gets confused about details, dates and names. The new company may tell the same story with different details.
– By exaggerating his arguments to make them seem truthful, a liar can go to the extreme where the statements become ridiculous. The most remarkable thing is that he often does not notice the absurdity of his statements.
– In addition to large, detailed lies to give himself greater importance, the mythomaniac lies about little things where this has no obvious practical benefit.
– A pathological liar loves to be the center of everyone’s attention, so he, without thinking, will talk even more unthinkable nonsense in order to maintain interest in himself.
– The truth has no value for a mythomaniac. Moral behavior is irrelevant.
– Nothing is sacred to a pathological liar. He can lie about someone’s serious illness or death, denigrate his loved ones, and easily say nasty things about a mutual friend.
- While a common person when communicating with unfamiliar people, may find it difficult to maintain a long eye contact, the liar will pull it off with ease.
– Does not see anything terrible in his lies (with less severity of the disorder), or does not recognize it at all under any circumstances (most often this is the case).
– A pathological liar cannot be pinned to the wall. When trying to expose him, he will inventively get out, coming up with even more implausible excuses, which, however, are difficult to verify. Witnesses to the events will end up emigrating, dying, or escaping using fake documents. He may put pressure on you emotionally and try to shift the blame, make you feel ashamed for not believing him.
– Emotional assessments of the same facts will change depending on the situation and environment. If you remind him of his previous assessment, he will flare up and accuse you of exaggeration, or, on the contrary, he will indifferently say that he was wrong and has changed his mind.
– Pathological liars are extremely impulsive, they always act “here and now”, so the lies they reproduce are quite inconsistent.
– A pseudologist often forgets what he has already lied about. For this reason, he often gives out opposing opinions and refutes himself.
– A pathological liar is characterized by chameleonism - he adapts to a stronger personality or to a person from whom he needs something. Tries to guess which answer you need, often has no opinion.
– Basically, liars believe that they are always right while others are wrong, and it is this unshakable belief in their own rightness that pulls them to the very bottom. They will argue with fierce persistence against the obvious.
– A pathological liar is able to admit to lying only when exposure could actually cause significant harm to him. Moreover, recognition usually occurs in a form that cannot even be called recognition.

If at least three or four signs are present, we can confidently assume that a person suffers from Munchausen syndrome. What should you do if you recognize someone as a pathological liar? Reaction normal person to a lie is anger, disappointment and resentment, as well as the desire to prove to the liar that he is lying and the desire to change him or re-educate him. But in a relationship with a pathological liar, it is important to remember that you have encountered a disease.

Is there a treatment? Is it possible to correct such a person? Psychologists disagree. It is clear that a person himself must want to correct himself, but how is this possible if the structure of his brain does not allow him to believe that lying is bad? It turns out that there is no treatment. But what should everyone who has experienced or is experiencing the nightmare of communicating with a pathological liar do?

Here are some tips from psychologists:

– Repeat to yourself many times that a person is sick and that moral examples and instructions will not help, on the contrary, you will only wear yourself out.
– Stop believing in his fables and fables, no matter how plausible they may seem, because... they destroy your own reality. Question every word that comes out of his mouth.
– Stop thinking that you somehow hurt this person’s feelings and that’s why he behaves this way. You have nothing to do with it, this is a disease. A pathological liar, due to his illness, is not tormented by remorse and does not think about how you feel, he doesn’t care.
– Kill the hope in yourself (and it dies last) that this person will become better. Do not justify him and do not hope that he (she) will change for your sake, do not try to convince him. Munchausen syndrome - quite serious disorder behavior that the psychotherapist must correct.
– Emotionally break away, separate from such a person.
– If possible, remove this person from yourself, cut off all channels of communication.
– Catch your breath, relax and restore your world, in which white is still white.
– Resist the temptation to corner a pathological liar, as this may worsen his mental state.
– Remember that a pathological liar will never get used to the real world; it is easier for him to live in his castle in the air.
– If it is impossible to separate emotionally and break off relationships for some reason, try to redirect the pseudologist’s energy into a creative direction. For example, invite him to draw, write poetry, stories, music, design, etc.

Materials used:
http://www.yana.enikeeva.ru/patologicheskiy-lzhets.html
www.myjane.ru/articles/text/?id=10229
http://newwoman.ru/letter.php?id=2812
http://www.usc.edu/uscnews/stories/11655.html
http://www.iarltula.ru/publics11.html
http://www.radiuscity.ru/articles.aspx?id=3741
http://ru.wikipedia.org/
http://dosvidos.ru/view/79457/

How to recognize mental disorders in a person and what to do to protect your own mental health? Walking through life, we meet a lot different people with whom we build different types relationships. In most cases, the people we decide to build with friendly relations, appeal to us on many levels - emotional, intellectual, spiritual, physical and so on. If, after some time, we notice an inconsistency at some level, then internal discomfort arises and the relationship turns into a less deep form, descending to the level of acquaintance or “hello-bye.” This often happens with childhood friends when personal development progresses. different speeds and in different directions. This happened to me with several friends: after a very close friendship in childhood and adolescence, we did not communicate for some time, and after renewing our relationship in adulthood, the understanding came that this was not “your” person. This is an interesting process, often emotionally painful (how is it possible, we’ve been friends for so many years, we’ve grown up together, and now there’s nothing to talk about?), but logical and natural. C'est la vie, as the French say.

This article will not talk about natural processes, but about anomalies. On the Russian-language Internet, the topic of mental disorders in outwardly normal and ordinary people Quite poorly lit. Websites of psychology and psychoanalysis touch on it superficially, within the framework of an appendage to narcotic or alcohol addiction. On the English-language Internet, on the contrary, this topic is covered very widely, with symptoms and diagnosis, with stories of people who have become victims and hostages of pathological liars and patients with narcissism. There are also stories from patients themselves about how they perceive the world and why they behave inappropriately.

I’m not a psychologist and don’t even pretend to be that title, so if I’m missing or distorting something, please add and correct it! I share my observations and searches, as I have been in close contact with pathological liars and “narcissists” several times in my life, they have affected me vivid impression. Of course, no people are one hundred percent consistent with what is described below, but some signs in different combinations are often present in people with pathology. Perhaps this article will help some women, since according to statistics, men are more likely to suffer from mental disorders of this type, and women are more likely to become hostages and victims.

So, pathological liars or Munchausen syndrome.

If you are a person for whom honesty and moral, decent behavior in people are valuable and important, then a close relationship with a pathological liar can be a nightmare that you have never experienced in your life and did not even think was possible. Such a relationship will devastate you morally and emotionally; you may feel like the end of the world has come, and you don’t know how to live on. The reason for this state will be the discrepancy between your reality and the world created by a pathological liar. You are accustomed to a world where white is white and black is black, but they convince you that everything is the other way around.

Psychologists attribute the occurrence of this disorder to a number of traumatic events that happened to a person in childhood. This may be constant humiliation and criticism from adults, lack of love from parents, unrequited first love or rejection by the opposite sex, which leads to low self-esteem during growing up. Sometimes the same disorder can appear in adulthood after a traumatic brain injury. Also, researchers at the University of Southern California found that pathological lying also has a physical basis. Their conclusion was that the brains of pathological liars differ from the norm: in their prefrontal cortex, the volume of gray matter (neurons) is reduced and the volume of white matter (nerve fibers connecting parts of the brain) is increased by 22 percent. This part of the brain is associated with both learning moral behavior and the feeling of remorse. Gray matter consists of brain cells, and white matter is like a “connecting wire” between them. Excess white matter increases the ability of pathological liars to lie (they find it much easier to do the difficult work of fantasy) and weakens their moral restraint. Our morality and model of correct behavior are not obligatory for them, although in childhood these people were taught that lying is wrong, just like everyone else.

The severity of this disease may vary. Spouses of some pathological liars note that these people lie for no reason, just like that, and lie about small, unimportant things. For example, they lie about doing something yesterday and not today, for no apparent reason or benefit. Psychologists say that pathological liars may or may not believe their lies. People with strong degree diseases believe their own stories. They create around themselves the kind of world they need in this moment in a conversation with this interlocutor. Often, having switched to a new interlocutor, they create a completely different world. Pathological liars with a less severe form of the disease know that they are lying, but they believe that their lies do not harm anyone, so they do not understand why people around them are offended and turn away from them. On the contrary, lying helps them raise their self-esteem in the eyes of others, i.e. to create themselves as they would like, and not as they actually are. Because often the reality of their own person and life does not satisfy them so much that they consider life in an imaginary world to be a way out of the situation.

Typical behavior of a pathological liar:

. The story about the same event changes every time.
. Lies and exaggerates not only significant events in life to give himself greater importance, but also lies in everyday situations when it does not bring benefits.
. Whatever you do, a pathological liar will tell you that he can do it better than you.
. The truth has no value. Moral behavior is irrelevant.
. He/she will defend and dodge when pushed against the wall. He has exceptional skills to dodge in any situation and transfer the blame to you.
. Sees nothing wrong with him/her lying. After all, this does not harm anyone.
. Never admits to lying. He can confess in a distorted form (in such a way that it doesn’t even look like a confession) only in exceptional cases: when exposure can actually cause damage to the family/work/life of a pathological liar. That is, to make the unloved reality even worse.
. Often forgets what he has already lied about. For this reason, he often gives out opposing opinions and refutes himself.
. Chameleonism - adapts to a stronger personality or to a person from whom something is needed. Tries to guess which answer you need, often has no opinion.
. “Nothing is sacred to this person” - he may lie about a fracture in a child, illness of a spouse, death in the family, etc. and so on. He takes advantage of the fact that a normal person would consider such a lie impossible and blasphemous - well, people don’t lie about such things!

The reaction of a normal person to a lie is anger, disappointment and resentment, as well as the desire to prove to the liar that he is lying and the desire to change/re-educate him. But in a relationship with a pathological liar, it is important to remember that he lies not to hurt you (although purposeful lies with intentional infliction of pain are also not uncommon in people with narcissism), but in order to make himself feel better. Pathological liars often have few friends.

But what should everyone who has experienced or is experiencing the nightmare of communicating with such a person do? Here are some tips:

. Repeating to yourself many times that a person is sick and that moral examples and instructions will not help, on the contrary, you will only wear yourself out.
. Stop believing in his fables and fables, no matter how plausible they may seem. Question every word that comes out of his mouth.
. Stop thinking that you somehow hurt this person’s feelings and that’s why he behaves this way. You have nothing to do with it, this is a disease. A pathological liar, due to his illness, does not suffer from remorse and does not think about how you feel, he doesn’t care.
. Kill the hope in yourself (and it dies last) that this person will become better.
. Stop giving chances.
. Emotionally break away, separate and not hope for change.
. If possible, remove this person from yourself, cut off all channels of communication.
. Catch your breath, relax and restore your world, in which white is still white.
. Do not give in to the temptation to put a pathological liar against the wall, as this is fraught with a deterioration in his mental state.
. Remember that a pathological liar will never get used to the real world; it is easier for him to live in his castle in the air.

Alyonka (USA)

Pathological liar is a psychological personality type; a person who often lies in an attempt to impress others. This was first described in the medical literature more than 100 years ago. Some psychologists believe that pathological liars differ from ordinary liars in that the pathological liar is confident that he is telling the truth and at the same time gets used to the role. Many, however, do not completely agree with this interpretation, but agree that pathological is a special mental condition. Although the term "pathological liar" is not used in clinical diagnostics, most psychiatrists believe that this personality type is either the result psychiatric illness, or low self-esteem.

Psychologists attribute the emergence of this disorder - that is, a person’s tendency to pathological lies - to a series of traumatic events that happened to a person in . This may be constant humiliation and criticism from adults, lack of love from parents, unrequited first love or rejection by the opposite sex, which leads to low self-esteem during growing up. Sometimes the same disorder can appear in adulthood after a traumatic brain injury. Also, researchers at the University of Southern California found that pathological lying also has a physical basis. Their conclusion was that the brains of pathological liars differ from the norm: in their prefrontal cortex, the volume of gray matter (neurons) is reduced and the volume of white matter (nerve fibers connecting parts of the brain) is increased by 22 percent. This part of the brain is associated with both learning moral behavior and the feeling of remorse.

Gray matter consists of brain cells, and white matter is like a “connecting wire” between them. Excess white matter increases the ability of pathological liars to lie (they find it much easier to do the difficult work of fantasy) and weakens their moral restraint. Our morality and model of correct behavior are not obligatory for them, although in childhood these people were taught that lying is wrong, just like everyone else.

The severity of this disease may vary. Spouses of some pathological liars note that these people lie for no reason, just like that, and lie about small, unimportant things. For example, they lie about doing something yesterday and not today, for no apparent reason or benefit. Psychologists say that pathological liars may or may not believe their lies. People with severe illness believe their own stories. They create the kind of world around them that they need at the moment in a conversation with a given interlocutor. Often, having switched to a new interlocutor, they create a completely different world. Pathological liars with a less severe form of the disease know that they are lying, but they believe that their lies do not harm anyone, so they do not understand why people around them are offended and turn away from them. On the contrary, a lie helps them raise themselves in the eyes of others, that is, create themselves the way they would like, and not what they really are. Because often the reality of their own person and life does not satisfy them so much that they consider life in an imaginary world to be a way out of the situation.

Pathological lying should be considered part of an underlying psychological personality disorder rather than a separate flaw. It should be noted that this is one of the most controversial subjects in today's world of psychology. The consequences of a hopeless lie can be the most unpredictable for both the victim of deception and the liar himself.

Besides using untruths, there are certain things that pathological liars tend to do consciously and unconsciously. If you can recognize these “symptoms”, then bring to clean water a liar will not be difficult.

By exaggerating his arguments to make them seem truthful, a liar can go to the extreme where the statements become ridiculous. The most remarkable thing is that he often does not notice the exaggerated degree of his own.

A pathological liar loves to be the center of everything, so he, without thinking, will talk even more unthinkable nonsense in order to maintain interest in his person.

While an average person might find it difficult to maintain prolonged eye contact when interacting with people they don't know, a liar will do so with simple ease.

The tendency to lie begins at a young age; over the years, it becomes more and more difficult for a person to tell the truth.

Pathological lying is difficult to control. An attentive observer will notice that the same story from the mouth of a liar is modified from time to time.

A lie contradicts itself. This can be seen in the continuations of stories heard earlier.

If you try to double-check the facts at the expense of , the pathological liar will immediately become defensive or attempt to change the topic of conversation.

Pathological liars are extremely impulsive, they always act “here and now”, so the lies they reproduce are quite inconsistent.

Basically, liars believe that they are always right while others are wrong, and it is this unshakable belief that pulls them to the bottom. They will argue with fierce persistence against the obvious.

Before tearing off the masks from those around you, armed typical signs presence of lies, you must remember that if a person demonstrates several signs from this list, this does not mean that this is a pathological liar. Denunciation, as well as accusations, must be approached with very serious reasons and evidence, so check your observations through the prism of doubt, compare with the observations of other people, and only then draw appropriate conclusions.

Mythomania is unpleasant mental disorder, because of which a person loses his authority in society, they begin to call him a “writer.” After some time, a person is completely no longer trusted, he has sharply fewer friends, and he is isolated from society. Latest Research have proven that pathological liars have less gray matter in their brains, which is responsible for information processing, while they have more white matter, which is responsible for processing. Scientists are sure that incorrect brain structure is one of the reasons why a person constantly lies. How dangerous is the condition? What can it lead to?

Description

Mythomania is not a disease, but has a number of symptoms reminiscent of personality disorder. Sometimes the condition is considered one of the signs of schizophrenia. Experts say that pathology often occurs when a person constantly invents different diseases for himself.

Please note that it is one thing for a person to lie in order to protect a loved one from terrible truth. It’s another matter if mythomaniacs believe in an invented reality.

Who is susceptible to mythomania?

When a person cannot find himself for a long time to achieve his goal, he becomes completely disappointed and is sure that only some people can achieve the desired result. Subsequently, various myths, dreams, and unrealized plans appear, which the patient presents to others as reality. It also emphasizes how significant his person is.

After creating the illusion of success, a person thinks that this way he will be able to increase his rating. Subsequently, the mythomaniac believes in the invented situation. In addition, the patient does not want to think about self-deception, which seriously destroys the psyche.

In children, deception is a method psychological protection. At a certain stage of life it is natural process. When children lie, they try to hide their fears and secrets. But adults have a completely different motivation.

Often, due to fantasies, various conflicts arise, and the liar begins to be taken lightly. Over time, a person completely loses confidence and self-esteem.

Causes

Most often, the disease is typical for those who have low self-esteem. A person begins to lie in order to feel important; he cannot treat other people differently. The patient thus tries to attract attention, while quite exaggerating the situation. Sometimes fantasies resemble entire humorous stories.

Attention! If you notice signs of the disorder or your loved ones suffer from mythomania, it is better to immediately consult a psychotherapist.

The psychologist returns the patient to real world, finds the difference between lies and truth, teaches you to respect yourself, and not constantly live in a lie. If other symptoms occur in some situations, antidepressants and sedatives are prescribed.

Characteristics of a pathological liar

The patient quickly composes different stories, while they are plausible. Some external internal influences are the cause of lies. For example, a person previously had to endure blackmail, extortion of money, as a result psychological trauma he started lying.

All stories are positive. The patient almost always decorates his heroes, and may become them himself. The patient may imagine that he has connections with famous, high-ranking people.

Sometimes pathological lying accompanies false memory syndrome. In this case, the sufferer is sure: everything he says really happened before. The patient is confident that he has achieved love and accomplished great things.

Diagnostics

The disease is quite difficult to diagnose in a timely manner, because it is necessary to take into account different criteria for assessing the condition. Pathological lies accompanied by narcissistic personality disorder, antisocial behavior, psychopathy,.

During a lie detector test, the doctor notices stress, increased arousal, and a feeling of guilt from deception appears. Please note that if a person has suffered due to an antisocial disorder, he is lying for his own benefit - power, sex, money.

Danger

Mythomania is internal pathological condition. A pathological liar tries to overcome feelings of abandonment, cannot tolerate abuse, and blames others. But with borderline disorder, a person is confident in himself, so he lies successfully.

If you compare mythomaniacs with theatrical figures, liars always lie dramatically. They are sure that they are perfect, so they should be deified.

The patient often invents situations because he is bored with life, and motivates his condition with fictitious psychological disorders, various diseases.

Treatment methods

To help the patient get rid of pathological lies, doctors use psychotherapy. Rarely prescribed pharmaceuticals. Some studies show that many patients are predisposed to deception. Even with the use of modern psychotherapeutic techniques, processes in the brain do not change.

Pathological lying is a rather complex phenomenon compared to other mental illness. It negatively affects life and completely changes its quality. Today, scientists continue to work on this problem.

So, mythomania is enough dangerous condition, which can lead to distortion of reality. Often the mythomaniac begins to get too carried away with his roles and gets confused between reality and fiction. This condition interferes with personal relationships and at work. Although some people achieve success through lies, they are not interested in material matters. They have a different goal - to make people notice, start to be proud, and bow down. Be careful and take good care of your mental health!

A pathological liar is someone who uncontrollably tells lies or fabricates information. A pathological liar may not be completely in our reality. Often, in an attempt to cure his low self-esteem, he himself believes in his own lies. To identify a pathological liar, take a closer look at his behavior. A person may lie for attention or for personal gain. You may also notice constant inconsistencies in his stories. Problems such as substance abuse or a history of unstable relationships may also indicate that a person is a pathological liar.

Steps

Study human behavior

Examine the nature of potential lies. You may suspect a friend, family member, or colleague of having a habit of telling lies. Separate the misinformation and think about what they have in common. Pathological liars may lie out of boredom or self-doubt, or to gain sympathy.
- Some pathological liars may actively try to gain sympathy in a situation. They usually tend to exaggerate, fake pain and illness, or, for example, make a mountain out of a mountain with every minor problem.
- Pathological liars may also have low self-esteem. They lie to make themselves seem more important than they really are. For example, they exaggerate their personal or professional achievements to make their life seem more impressive.
- Some pathological liars lie simply out of boredom. They will make things up and create stories to hurt others. The drama created in this way relieves the boredom in their lives.
Listen to other people retell stories. Pathological liars can often be caught in deception. It is not uncommon to hear someone retell a story that allegedly happened to a deceiver. If anything in this story seems familiar to you, don't doubt that you've heard it before.
- A pathological liar may be heard repeating a story from a friend or family member, or retelling the plot of a book or television show. In the deceiver's version, the stories may be slightly embellished.
- For example, your colleague tells a story that sounds familiar to you, but you are not sure that you have heard it before. Later you see a similar event on the news. If your colleague is a pathological liar, he could easily steal a story from the news and pass it off as his own.
Pay attention to whether the person is avoiding answering. In a frank conversation, a pathological liar may avoid answering a question. Such people are manipulators by nature, so you may even think that they answered you, although in fact this is not the case.
- For example, your friend tells you that she recently had a big fight with her boyfriend. best friend. You've been having trouble communicating with this friend and would like to know if she's having relationship problems. business as usual. You ask something like: “Why did you and Masha stop communicating?”
- A friend might respond, “We haven’t actually spoken in a year.” But she didn't answer specifically. She can also evade more direct questions. For example, you ask: “Did you let Masha down as often as you did me?” In response, you may hear: “Do you really think I’m that kind of person?”
Beware of manipulation. Pathological liars are experts at manipulating others. They tend to study other people to find ways to divert their attention from lying. Pay attention to how a pathological liar communicates with you. You may discover hidden manipulation.
- Pathological liars often use sexual attraction as a tool of emotional manipulation. If you are attracted to someone who may be a pathological liar, they may flirt with you when you try to get them to come clean.
- These people also study you carefully and learn your personal boundaries. Pathological liars have a great sense of which people will believe their lies. For example, they may realize that you won't believe stories about illness, but you might believe stories about emotional problems. If you hear a liar talking to someone else, he may feign complaints of pain and itching, but will not mention these symptoms to you.
Take a closer look at how a person reacts when he is caught in a lie. Pathological liars are not all the same, but most react aggressively when exposed. If someone becomes angry when accused of lying, you may be dealing with a potential liar.
- A pathological liar may become defensive or blame someone else for their lies. For example: “The only reason I came up with all this is because we have an insufferable boss.”
- He may also come up with new lies to justify old ones. For example: “No, I really spent money on car repairs, but half of it was spent on buying groceries. I forgot to tell you I stopped at the store.”
- He may get angry when he is caught in a lie. Will get angry, scream, or even start crying to gain sympathy.
Find out if he has mental health problems. Pathological lying may be associated with certain mental disorders, such as borderline disorder personality, depression, bipolar disorder, narcissistic personality disorder. If you are close to this person, you may be able to learn about such problems and convince him to seek professional help.
- If you know that a person has been diagnosed with a disorder, you may be able to spot patterns in their lies. Does he only lie in certain circumstances? Is he trying to pretend he is not who he is through lies, or to impress others? Does he lie to avoid talking about certain situations?

Assess risk factors

Look for underlying hidden habits. If a person has problems with illegal substance use, gambling, impulsive overeating, or other destructive behavior, chances are good that he is a pathological liar.
- For example, at corporate events you may notice that your colleague drinks too much. Perhaps he refills his glass while no one is looking, or even carries a flask with him.
- Or you don't watch one of your colleagues at lunch, but periodically notice signs of food in her workplace. She may keep her diet a closely guarded secret and tend to turn down invitations to eat with coworkers.
- Does the person have stable romantic and friendly relationships? A lack of time-tested friends and a series of failed romances may signal that he is a pathological liar.
- A pathological liar may also become estranged from his or her family.
Research a person's career. A pathological liar could obtain his position through deception and pressure. Achievement list his resume may be too long, with most of these jobs lasting short term. A person may also shy away from asking why he didn't stay in a particular position for a long time.
- Let's say a pathological liar has a long resume. In most places he worked for a very short period of time. If you ask a pathological liar about his career, he will likely evade the answer.
- In some cases, a pathological liar may do a lot of back and forth when trying to explain sudden change careers. Very often such people burn bridges behind them when leaving their positions.

Realize that you will never hear the true side of the story when talking to a pathological liar.
Remember that pathological liars tend to exaggerate everything they tell you, so divide everything they say by three.
Someone who constantly lies to you is showing a kind of disrespect. This is not a person you should trust or consider as your best friend.
If you care about this person, remind him often that he doesn't have to pretend to be perfect. Tell us about a few of your failures and embarrassing moments in life.

Warnings

You can advise a person to go to therapy to stop lying, but you cannot force him to do it. In fact, you may find it very difficult to even convince the person that lying is a problem, let alone the need for treatment.
If you suspect that a person is lying to cover up illegal activities, you may want to contact law enforcement.