What should parents do if their child smokes. If a teenager started smoking, what to do

Smoking has become a comprehensive problem, the statistics are disappointing: approximately 60% of adolescents aged 14-17 are prone to this addiction. Moreover, girls take their first cigarette even earlier than boys. There are many reasons for acquiring bad habits. One of the main ones is the lack of attention from parents. The rhythm of life, work, everyday worries and constant movement around the city do not leave room for sincere conversations with children.

In adolescence, children are very vulnerable, they may have problems in communication. Various methods are chosen for the socialization of the individual, a cigarette can become one of the ways of self-affirmation in a children's company.

Another reason for smoking is the negative example of parents. If mom or dad smokes, then the child does not perceive this process with a negative assessment. He is not repelled by the smell, he is used to the smell of tobacco from his parents. In families where the father or mother smokes, children have a greater predisposition to smoking.

Psychologists name several reasons for the emergence of addiction to tobacco products:

the teenager does not have constant contact with his parents;
there is no positive example of a healthy lifestyle before your eyes;
false ideals and stereotypes are embedded in the mind (a cigarette is cool);
there are no sports loads;
there is a lack of information about the dangers of smoking;
the presence of smoking relatives.

Beginning smoker symptoms

If parents do not smoke, they will immediately feel the stench of cigarettes. The smell of tobacco remains in the hair, on clothes. If you kiss and hug your son or daughter when you return from work, you are sure to smell new scents. Young smokers give out a dry cough, and if the process is delayed, then yellow fingers and teeth. There are also changes in the behavior of children in connection with the emergence of a bad habit, they become anxious, secrecy appears. Constant chewing of chewing gum that has a strong flavor should also alert parents. A sharp shortage of pocket money is a consequence of buying expensive cigarettes.

Worse, if you observe symptoms that confirm that your offspring smokes spice or weed. Nervousness and sudden mood swings are the first signs of a misfortune that has arisen. A few hours after weed, swelling of the eyelids and redness of the eyes are visible. . But even this sad discovery should not be accompanied by aggression. Show your son or daughter how much pain they cause you, destroying their health. Try to find words that will lead to a joint fight against a bad habit.

Tips for parents

Loving attentive parents do not even have the question of how to find the first cigarette smoked. They will see the change immediately. If the family has a trusting relationship, then the child can tell himself that he tried to smoke a cigarette.

After such discoveries or confessions, it is important not to break loose and not yell: “We raised you, blew off dust particles, regularly took you to the sea so that you could breathe clean air, buy vitamins, and you ruin your health!” Try to ask, without showing emotions, what did the teenager feel after the first puff? Did he experience a sore throat, nausea? Doesn't his head hurt, doesn't his heart ache? Is it difficult for him now to run in physical education classes, is there shortness of breath? Try to ask calmly, like a local doctor at the reception. It is clear that nothing terrible will happen from one cigarette, but your task is to give out the entire list of diseases that smoking causes. Do not be afraid to use stories with a tragic end, tell how the father of a school friend, the uncle of a classmate, suffered from lung cancer. You do not injure the psyche, teenagers are less prone to empathy, but such facts will make many think.

If the student did not like the acquaintance with cigarettes, you need to prove that this is normal, you can tell the company about this. Tell us about relatives, friends who tried smoking and did not like it. Now they are successful healthy people.

What to do if a child starts smoking? If conversations do not help and promises to quit are not fulfilled, you should not drag out the problem and turn it into an open conflict. Persuade the child together to seek help from specialists at the Insight psychological support center. Here you can visit individual consultations, a club for teenagers. Our psychologists will help children get rid of this bad habit and feel comfortable in the team. Call!

Over the years, you have given your child only the best, taught him to distinguish good from bad. However, over time, the authority of parents, no matter how perfect they may be, gradually loses its strength. With a transitional age, the environment begins to influence the child. Moreover, this influence is not always positive: a teenager is often instilled with vices, as well as "bad habits" - for example, smoking cigarettes.

Before the Easy Way to Quit Smoking course, participants complete a questionnaire where one of the questions is about the age at which the first cigarette was smoked. Sadly, the average age is 14.

Blame for this, of course, smoking parents, friends, relatives. But let's not forget about the tobacco companies, for which children and teenagers have become the main target audience. And if in the past paid advertising existed in films, including children's films, today veiled advertising is present in animated series and computer games.

It is extremely important to be vigilant and know in advance about the main signs that a child smokes cigarettes in order to prevent it in the early stages and / or eliminate it in the future.

Unfortunately, the consequences of smoking are very serious:

oncology;
diseases of the heart and blood vessels;
diseases of the endocrine system;
depressive states;
chronic hypoxia;
schizophrenic manifestations;
suppression of the immune system, etc.

This also applies to electronic cigarettes, as they contain the same nicotine as regular cigarettes. Moreover, electronic gadgets are promoted under the guise of harmless - they are even positioned as a way to help quit smoking.

Here are some tips to determine if a teenager smokes or not. Just keep in mind that if you smoke, then it will be extremely difficult to bring all the dangers to the child, and even more so to make him quit smoking.

Pay attention to cough. One of the most common and immediate symptoms of smoking is coughing, which children who smoke often suffer from. It can appear just a few days after the onset, it can even appear with intermittent smoking. The cough usually gets worse in the morning and lessens during the day. In heavy smokers, coughing is usually accompanied by phlegm, which can be clear, yellow, or even green.
Bad breath from smoking regular cigarettes. If your child brushes his teeth often, even in the middle of the day, then he is probably trying to get rid of the smell of tobacco. Sometimes even small children who smoke worry about yellow spots on their teeth, so if a child has become interested in whitening toothpastes, this may also indicate smoking. You should also be alerted if the child has become more likely to use chewing gum or mouthwash.
Children who start smoking electronic cigarettes do not worry about the condition of their teeth and bad breath. Those who smoke e-cigarettes tend to start coughing due to powerful irritation from e-cigarette vapor, which contains poisonous nicotine, propylene glycol, and synthetic flavors. This can be determined visually: under the pretext of looking at the teeth, pay attention to the irritation of the mucosa.
Specific wheezing. Severe wheezing can be caused by the common cold and other factors, one of which is airway/lung damage from smoking or vaping e-cigarettes.
Dyspnea. This is a powerful sign by which a person who smokes can be identified. If your child runs out of breath quickly during physical activity or takes a long time to "breathe" after physical activity, then there is a good chance that he smokes.
The frequency of respiratory diseases. People who smoke are more prone to developing respiratory diseases such as colds, bronchitis and pneumonia. If your child has become sick more often, then the likely causes may be a weakened immune system and inflammation of the respiratory tract caused by smoking conventional or electronic cigarettes.

Other signs of smoking in a young child or teen

Note. Sometimes teenagers try to hide the smell of smoke with toilet water or body deodorant. This will not prevent you from smelling. Of course, provided that you yourself do not smoke.

The smell of cigarette smoke. This smell is difficult to get rid of, so you are almost guaranteed to be able to smell it from your clothes or hair if your teen smokes.
Notice if the child starts leaving windows open in their room. Children often try to ventilate their room by leaving the window open after smoking. Pay special attention if they insist on leaving it open even when it's too cold, rainy, etc.
The child carries matches or a lighter in a backpack/pocket. It is difficult to notice these small objects, but if you find them, this is a sign that your child has started smoking. The unequivocal evidence can be a pack of cigarettes, which, according to the teenager, a friend asked to leave.

Why do children smoke?

Adolescence is complicated by the fact that young people strive to feel like adults, trying to prove to the whole world that they are already capable of making independent decisions. As a result, they fall into several traps that invariably lead children to start smoking.

Trying to be yours. Many teen companies have their own rules that must be met in order to become their own. Often one of the rules becomes a cigarette. If you want to become your own, smoke with everyone. This, unfortunately, is one of the most common reasons why children smoke.
Desire to be cool. In order to prove your superiority to your peers, you need to commit some act condemned by adults. That's why kids smoke to be cool. Also, addiction to a cigarette can arise due to imitation of movie characters or computer games.
The need to prove one's maturity. Children who smoke in their own eyes seem more mature than they really are. In this case, a simple mechanism works: to be an adult, you need to act like an adult - adults smoke - if I start smoking, I will become an adult.

Photo project: smoking children

Sadly, many adults do not think about the problems of children's smoking. It seems to them that this is pampering, which will pass along with the transitional age. But it's not. Why should we worry about kids smoking? Because this can lead to a persistent addiction, which will be more and more difficult to get rid of every year.

If it seems to you that there is nothing wrong with the fact that children smoke, take a look at the photo project of the same name. No words are needed here. Just take a close look at these photos.

What should parents do to prevent or stop the existing addiction in children who smoke?

Note. If you have a history of smoking, tell your children how hard it was to quit, how you regret smoking your FIRST cigarette.

Talk to your child about smoking before he tries his first cigarette! Such conversations need to be planned much earlier than you think. Children who smoke need to understand all about the dangers of conventional and electronic cigarettes. This should be a very important conversation. Your task is to create a negative attitude towards smoking / vaping before the child has a desire to try it.
Ask your children about smoking. Be honest with your children and ask them to be open about whether they smoke or not. No negativity or threats. Tell them that you love them no matter what. You understand that smoking is a great temptation that you do not approve of. Start on time is all you need to do to help your child.
Your child has admitted to smoking. Don't scold him - it's not his fault. Try to gather as much information as possible. Ask your child when and why he started smoking, how often he smokes, and if his friends smoke. This will help you understand what attracts him to smoking. You will also be better prepared to help him quit this "bad habit".
If the child confessed, then, of course, it is difficult to be calm. However, you must calm down. Children will not be verbose if you are even outwardly upset. Talk to your child about smoking, answer his questions and tell him that he is always free to talk to you about any topic.
Explain to your child that you do not approve of smoking in general. Even if it seems to you that the child is ignoring you, let him know that smoking is prohibited. If you do not have a firm position, then he will not understand that smoking is not allowed.
Explain the consequences of smoking. Smoking does not provide any benefits, but it does have real negative effects. It is useless. Talk to your children about the effects of smoking, discuss the following factors:
- health risk. There are many obvious and very scary health problems that come with smoking/vaping. Be frank with your children, tell them about the risk of heart disease, the likelihood of developing cancer, statistics about early death caused by smoking. List other unattractive aspects of smoking that children who smoke or vape have to live with. Nicotine suppresses mental abilities, memory and thinking. Cigarette smoke stinks hair and clothes. Nicotine destroys the oral mucosa, causing an unpleasant odor, stains on the teeth, premature aging;
- money . Smoking is an expensive habit. Even if your child has a part-time job, the financial strain for a nicotine addict is very palpable;
- mathematics . Find out how much a pack of cigarettes costs, how much your child smokes (or use an average value - one pack per day), and calculate how much he will spend on average per month, year of smoking. The financial cost will be a sobering reality, even if the teenager is not concerned about the physical risks;
- addiction . This is the main thing to explain. Dependence creates nicotine, which is contained in both conventional and electronic cigarettes. Explain to a young child that addiction is not just about nicotine. Children who smoke in the future will have to pay with their health, time, opportunities, confidence.

Pass

The problem of nicotine addiction all over the world is quite acute. Perhaps the most unpleasant thing about this medical and social phenomenon is that children are increasingly becoming smokers. According to statistics, boys smoke their first cigarette at the age of 10, young ladies - closer to 13 years.

And although the initial experience usually does not give any pleasure, the child continues to smoke "for the company", fearing to stand out among smoking peers. According to narcologists, dependence is formed after the fifth cigarette smoked.

Not surprisingly, many parents are concerned about what to do if a teenager starts smoking.

It is not very difficult to identify a smoker in a child, because teenagers usually do not know how to pretend, hide their hobbies. Therefore, the main signs of smoking children are visible to the naked eye:

And, of course, the most obvious indicator is if you caught a child smoking a cigarette. Here, as they say, do not turn away. But the stories of "well-wishers" who allegedly saw your offspring smoking should be treated with a fair amount of skepticism.

But this information should not be discounted either, you just need to take a closer look at your son or daughter.

Why does a child start smoking?

If a teenager is addicted to smoking, first of all, parents need to understand why the addiction arose, where the legs come from the first cigarette smoked. If you have a trusting relationship with a child, it's best to just talk.

In the case of secretive behavior of the offspring, you need to analyze your relationship, remember the circle of his friends.

Why does a child start smoking? Psychologists and narcologists identify the following reasons for the emergence of such a habit:

the child takes an example from smoking parents;
interest in cigarettes, that is, simply wanted to try;
imitates smoking friends;
smoking is fashionable, from his point of view;
started smoking on a dare, because his friends claimed that he was a weakling and a sissy;
the child focuses on smoking characters in movies, music videos;
"pecked" at the bright commercials demonstrating the approval of this lifestyle;
children protest against parental diktat in such a way, that is, the child starts smoking to spite his mother or father (this is from the series “no one understands me”);
boring and monotonous pastime, lack of other hobbies, for example, playing sports;
desire to taste the "forbidden fruit".

As you can see, the list of possible reasons is quite impressive. However, the most significant and obvious motive is the personal example of smoking parents.

By the way, if you smoke yourself, it will significantly complicate the process of weaning your child from this addiction.

Before discussing the fight against this bad habit, it is necessary to dwell on how harmful nicotine is to the developing human body.

The modern child has a better attitude to scientific facts than to many hours of parental notation, not supported by anything but emotions.

The greatest danger of nicotine contained in tobacco products is for the nervous system. This chemical compound easily depletes nerve cells, which is manifested by overwork, irritability, and excessive excitability. Young smokers are always nervous and irritable.
Suffer from smoking and basic mental processes. Memory is rapidly deteriorating, thinking also begins to malfunction. And the more a child smokes, the more clearly negative tendencies appear.
Another suffering side is the respiratory system. The respiratory organs, which are still imperfect, cannot process tobacco smoke and the tar, methane, and nitrogen contained in it. Most of these chemical compounds settle on the lungs, which provokes numerous colds. Then smoking adolescents begin to change their voice, shortness of breath and a barking cough appear.
Suffering from smoking and tooth enamel. You must have noticed that many smokers have yellow teeth. This is due to the temperature difference: the air inhaled by the child is colder than cigarette smoke, which leads to the destruction of tooth enamel.
A teenager who is addicted to cigarettes often worsens the condition of the skin. Numerous pimples pop up, the skin begins to shine. With excessive enthusiasm for this habit, a distinct yellowness of the skin and nails is observed.

Adults, upon discovering that their child smokes, most often react very sharply and impulsively, even if they themselves are heavy smokers. Consider the most common and controversial parental reactions to childhood smoking.

Advanced adults allow their offspring to smoke at home and even with them, arguing that they do not want him to puff on a cigarette somewhere along the doorways. Some children, embarrassed and feeling guilty, throw the pack away, while others perceive the permission as a guide to action and start smoking even more, gradually moving on to harder drugs.
The other extreme is to force the child to smoke the whole pack, so that he will literally feel sick afterwards even from the cigarette smell. On many forums you can find similar stories: "And my father made me smoke 20 cigarettes." However, for some reason such revelations are written by heavy smokers who continue to smoke. In addition, this method is simply dangerous for the health of the child, there is a high probability of acute intoxication of the body and even death.
Another method is prohibition. Parents, demanding to quit nicotine, forbid the teenager to communicate with the “bad” company, go out in general, deprive him of pocket money and other privileges. The most common child reaction to such a parental step is a demarche, a rebellion, that is, the child will do everything out of spite: “They oppress me - I will smoke even more!”

Of course, the possibility of getting a reaction from a teenager does not mean that adults should not try to solve the problems that have arisen. Just parents should be guided by common sense and respect the child's personality.

The statistics are relentless - most often children start smoking in those families in which one or both parents also like to smoke a cigarette. Therefore, the very first way to prevent this bad habit is your own parental example. Agree, it is useless and even immoral to talk about the dangers of smoking or undesirable consequences, holding a cigarette in your hand. What else needs to be done?

It would seem banal advice, but many parents neglect it. It sounds simple - try to spend more time with a teenager, more often and sincerely be interested in his successes and failures. Try to share his hobbies: if he loves cycling, keep him company. Of course, you should not try to replace your peers and become "one on the board", you must remain an authority.
So that the child does not say: “No one listens to me and respects me,” give him more freedom in choosing clothes, literature, musical preferences. So you reduce the risk of a bad habit due to teenage rebellion and the desire to act out of spite, showing your adulthood and independence.
If your child is unsure of himself and tends to act “for the company”, being a leader in life, try to teach him to defend his own point of view and have his own position. Explain that you should not be like peers, smoking because friends smoke cigarettes. After all, a mature person knows how to resist the opinion of the crowd.
Conversations about the dangers of nicotine should be started not in adolescence, but even in childhood, when kids first start asking questions about "smoking sticks", "rings of smoke coming from their uncle's mouth." Here it is important to observe moderation, that is, you do not need to brush off the curious toddler, but you should not intimidate him with scary stories and pictures. Consider the age of the child!

The best “vaccination” against smoking is sports.

First, the child develops a negative attitude towards cigarettes, which can destroy his sports career. Secondly, physical activity contributes to the production of endorphins - hormones of happiness, which also resemble a kind of drug, but, of course, are good for health. And, thirdly, sports activities accelerate physical development, so there is no need to show your adulthood with a cigarette.

What if a teenager starts smoking?

So, you found out that the child tried to smoke. What might be your reaction? Of course, this news will upset you, and it is even more likely that you will fall into irritation and even rage. The most common reaction is a quarrel, scandal, hysteria (if the mother starts the conversation), slaps and slaps. However, as psychologists assure, shouting will not help.

First of all, accept this news, try to “digest” it, calm down a little, and only then start talking with your offspring and thinking about what to do in such a situation. And in fact, there are a lot of options for behavior. The choice of the most suitable one depends on several factors: the characteristics of the teenager, the reasons for his action, the psychological atmosphere in the family. What to do if the child tried to smoke?

First of all, try to find out why he started smoking, what became the main motive for this behavior. However, it is important not only to get an answer from the child, but to find out whether he himself understands what caused smoking, how dangerous it is for his health.
There is no need to start a serious conversation with an appeal to his age, they say, "you are still too young to smoke and generally decide something." This is the most unproductive beginning of the conversation, as the child will start doing out of spite to prove his adulthood. On the contrary, talk to him like an adult, making arguments.
If the reason is the desire to appear more mature, then try to prove that this is possible without nicotine addiction. An example would be some authoritative character - a musician, actor or a great athlete who does not smoke and actively spreads about it.
If you yourself are constantly smoking, it is time to end your addiction to cigarettes. You can offer your child to do it together - quitting smoking is always easier in the company. Tell him that it is much easier to give up the habit at first, give examples of acquaintances who successfully coped with addiction, discuss that the unwillingness of adults to fight the habit shows a weakness of character.
Present reliable medical data that clearly show the dangers of nicotine for children's lungs and other organs. Watch documentaries, look at pictures (it is advisable to do without the "darkness"). The word "cancer" doesn't mean anything for children yet, so focus on the consequences for the vocal cords, skin, and tooth enamel.
If your child started smoking out of boredom, find something to do with him that will take up most of his free time, so that there will be no time for the desire to raise a cigarette. Be sure to find out what is interesting to the teenager himself - for example, music, drawing. The best way out, as we wrote above, is to go in for sports, since athletes simply cannot smoke. And the time left from training can be spent on joint trips and travels.
Be sure to keep track of your offspring's friendships. However, you should not forbid seeing the company, otherwise you will achieve the opposite result. It is better to find out what attracts the child to communication with these specific children. By finding out why he strives specifically for them, you can direct his energy in the right direction and along the way change your behavior. It is no secret that it is parental employment that often pushes teenagers to try something new and the desire to stand out in the crowd of peers.
An alternative way is to give the teenager full responsibility for their own health. Did you know your child started smoking? Pretend you don't care and let him make the decision to smoke cigarettes. Usually, children, having heard such words from adults, almost immediately give up a bad habit, because now it has become permitted, open, which means that now this fruit is no longer so forbidden and sweet.
Analyze the family environment, since emotional distress in the home is often manifested by children's addiction to cigarettes. Even with an external gloss, the child feels his uselessness, dissatisfaction with his role in the cell of society. He probably started smoking or is just trying to smoke to get your attention. This is a kind of return to early childhood, when the baby is outrageous in order to stay longer with you.
If, after a constructive conversation, a teenager has promised to quit smoking, give full support. Regularly ask how he feels, if he wants to pick up a cigarette again. Encourage and praise your child for every day they go without nicotine. This is his and your small victory!
If none of the suggested recommendations help and you are afraid that the child may become addicted to more than just cigarettes, do not hesitate to seek qualified psychotherapeutic help. The psychologist will analyze your situation and give specific advice that is right for you. Just do everything carefully so that the child does not perceive your desire negatively.

Only a friendly attitude and your patience will help to find the right approach to a teenager who smokes. Refuse screams and scandals, punishments and curses, it is better to establish the cause, and then proceed to eliminate the consequences.

Hello, I'm Nadezhda Plotnikova. Having successfully studied at SUSU as a special psychologist, she devoted several years to working with children with developmental problems and advising parents on raising children. I apply the experience gained, among other things, in the creation of psychological articles. Of course, by no means do I pretend to be the ultimate truth, but I hope that my articles will help dear readers deal with any difficulties.

Many parents ask questions - “what to do if their son smokes grass”, this is shocking, as they understand that drugs are a very dangerous thing.

Let's take a look at this problem. First, once you know your child smokes weed, don't make hasty decisions. You must think soberly and adequately.

The child does not see anything wrong with drug use. In order to explain to him that using drugs does not bring anything good, you must be well versed in this topic.

We need to find out what kind of weed he smokes. At the moment, there are chemical analogues of marijuana, these smoking mixtures are very toxic and harmful to the body, especially for a young body.

First of all, synthetic smoking mixtures are harmful to the emerging young brain, as well as potency. You must explain that chemistry is very poorly excreted from the body.

Open Yandex and show him a video of how an overdose from spice occurs or how young guys commit suicide while in a state of drug intoxication.

Before starting a conversation, you must have comprehensive information, so we advise you to read the articles in the section.

If your son smokes marijuana, then this is not so scary, but nevertheless, this drug is also addictive and harms the body.

You should know how addiction to marijuana appears and how it harms the human body and psyche. If you don't know that, then you're not ready to talk. We advise you to familiarize yourself with such materials as, and.

Talk to the child. Find out why he started using drugs, where he gets his money from, what kind of friends he has.

In most cases, adolescent drug problems can be resolved by talking. Not by quarrels and threats, but by normal conversation.

Find out how long he has been using drugs. It is important. If he has been using drugs for more than 3 months, then he has already formed an addiction, and it will be extremely difficult to get rid of it on his own.

At the first stages, you can cure the addiction yourself, for this you need:

Change the circle of communication of the son;
Find him a job, hobby, hobby;
Support him and be interested in his life.

Psychologists say that: - "Adolescent drug addiction is born out of curiosity and develops due to emotional insufficiency."