How to get rid of intrusive thoughts. How to get rid of bad, obsessive, negative, bad thoughts in the head - psychotechnics: “Public significance” or “Distancing

A person may develop a state in which false ideas, thoughts try to take over consciousness. They attack daily, turning into an obsessive-compulsive disorder. This greatly complicates life, but there are ways to get rid of obsessive thoughts and fears. Without help, over time, the condition will only worsen. It will be more and more difficult to focus on really important things, to find the strength to overcome problems in everyday life. Subsequently, depression sets in, bad thoughts, desires, and sometimes the disorder escalates to schizophrenia.

Why does obsessive-compulsive disorder occur?

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) occurs when the mind is unable to suppress impulses to do something. At the same time, they crowd out all other thoughts, although they are meaningless or unfounded at the moment. The persistence of these impulses is so great that they cause fear. The development of obsessive-phobic manifestations, obsessive neurosis is influenced by biological and psychological factors with varying degrees.

The obsessive-compulsive disorder syndrome has different manifestations, but they all boil down to the main symptoms of this nature:

• repetitive actions, rituals;
• regular checks of their own actions;
• cyclical thoughts;
• dwelling on thoughts about violence, religion, or the intimate side of life;
• an irresistible desire to count numbers or fear of them.

In children

OCD also occurs in children. As a rule, the causes of development are psychological trauma. A neurosis develops in a child against the background of fright or punishment; an unfair attitude towards them from teachers or parents can provoke such a state. Separation from a father or mother at an early age has a strong influence. The impetus for the obsessive state is a transfer to another school or moving. A number of factors in the field of family relations that form a disorder in a child are described:

1. dissatisfaction with the sex of the child. In this case, qualities unusual for him are imposed on him, this causes high anxiety.
2. late child. Doctors have found a link between the age of the mother and the risk of developing psychosis in the child. If a woman is more than 36 years old during pregnancy, then the risk of anxiety of the baby necessarily increases.
3. Conflicts within the family. Often the negative from quarrels affects the child, he has a feeling of guilt. According to statistics, in families where a man actively participates in upbringing, neuroses in children occur much less frequently.
4. Incomplete family. The child lacks one half of the behavior pattern. The absence of a stereotype provokes the development of neurosis.

In adults

In the older generation, the occurrence of obsessive-compulsive disorder is influenced by biological and psychological causes. The first appear, according to doctors, due to disturbances in the metabolism of the neurotransmitter serotonin. It is generally accepted that it regulates the level of anxiety, having a connection with the receptors of nerve cells. They also take into account the influence of living conditions and ecology, but the connection has not yet been scientifically proven.

Psychological factors are manifested in certain life upheavals and stressful situations. You can not call this the causes of neurosis - rather, they become a trigger for those people who have a genetic predisposition to develop obsessive thoughts and fears. It is impossible to identify such hereditary features of a person in advance.

obsessive states

People with certain personality accentuations or those who have undergone psychotrauma are predisposed to an obsessive state. They are subject to an involuntary invasion of feelings, images, actions, they are haunted by obsessive thoughts about death. A person understands the groundlessness of such phenomena, but cannot independently overcome and solve such problems.

The clinical signs of such a condition largely depend on what exacerbated and arose a cognitive-behavioral disorder. At the moment, there are two main types of obsessive thoughts - intellectual and emotional manifestation. They provoke human phobias and panic fear, which sometimes completely break the life and habitual rhythm of people.

intellectual

Obsessive states of the intellectual type are commonly called obsessions or obsessions. In this type of disorder, the following common manifestations of obsession are distinguished:

1. "Mental chewing gum". Unreasonable thoughts, doubts for any reason, and sometimes without it.
2. Arrhythmia (compulsive counting). A person counts everything around: people, birds, objects, steps, etc.
3. Intrusive doubts. Manifested in a weakened fixation of events. The person is not sure that he turned off the stove, iron.
4. Intrusive repetition. Phone numbers, names, dates or titles are constantly replayed in the mind.
5. Intrusive presentations.
6. Intrusive memories. Usually indecent content.
7. Intrusive fears. They often appear in the field of work or sexual life. A person doubts that he is capable of doing something.
8. Contrasting obsessive state. A person has thoughts that do not correspond to typical behavior. For example, a good and not evil girl by nature has images of a bloody murder.

emotional

Emotional obsessive states include various phobias (fears), which have a specific direction. For example, a young mother experiences unreasonable anxiety that her child will be harmed or killed. Household phobias can be attributed to the same type - fear of the number 13, Orthodox churches, black cats, etc. There are many different types of fear that have been given special names.

Human phobias

1. Oxyphobia. The problem manifests itself in the fear of any sharp objects. A person is worried that he can injure others or himself.
2. Agrophobia. Obsessive fear of open space, attacks cause squares, wide streets. People suffering from such a neurosis appear on the street only accompanied by another person.
3. Claustrophobia. An obsessive problem is the fear of small, enclosed spaces.
4. Acrophobia. With this obsessive state, a person is afraid to be on top. There is dizziness and fear of falling.
5. Anthropophobia. The problem is the fear of large crowds. A person is afraid of fainting and being crushed by the crowd.
6. Misophobia. The patient is constantly worried that he will get dirty.
7. Dysmorphophobia. It seems to the patient that everyone around is paying attention to the ugly, incorrect development of the body.
8. Nosophobia. A person is constantly afraid of contracting a serious illness.
9. Nyctophobia. A kind of fear of the dark.
10. Mythophobia. A person is afraid to tell a lie, so he avoids communicating with people.
11. Thanatophobia is a type of fear of death.
12. Monophobia. A person is afraid to be alone, which is associated with the idea of ​​helplessness.
13. Pantophobia. The highest degree of general fear as such. The patient is afraid of everything around.

How to get rid of intrusive thoughts

The psychology of fear is designed in such a way that obsessive states cannot go away on their own. Living like this is extremely problematic, fighting on your own is difficult. In this case, close people should help, and for this you need to know how to get rid of obsessive thoughts and fear. Support can be provided by psychotherapeutic practices or independent work on the advice of psychologists.

Psychotherapeutic practices

With a clear psychogenic nature of the disorders, it is necessary to carry out therapy with the patient, based on the symptoms of the obsessive state. Apply psychological techniques individually for each patient. Obsessive-compulsive disorder treatment can be done individually or in a group. To cure a person, use such psychological types of therapy:

1. Rational psychotherapy. In the course of treatment, the specialist reveals the "trigger point" of the neurotic state, reveals the pathogenetic essence of the conflict. He tries to activate the positive aspects of the personality and corrects the negative, inadequate reactions of a person. Therapy should normalize the system of emotional-volitional response.
2. Group psychotherapy. The solution of intrapersonal problems occurs through the study of defects in interpersonal interaction. The practical work focuses on the ultimate problem for dealing with intrapersonal obsessions.

The degree of obsessive states can be different, so the presence of the latter is not a direct road to psychiatry. Sometimes people just need to figure out how to distract themselves from the bad thoughts that originate in the subconscious. To overcome obsessive fear and anxiety, you can use the following techniques:

There are a number of reasons that complicate the process of recovery from obsessive fear. For some, this is due to lack of confidence in themselves and their strengths, others lack perseverance, and others do expect everything to go away on its own. There are a number of examples of famous people who, on the way to success, managed to overcome their phobias and fears, coped with internal problems. To do this, psychological techniques are used to help a person remove obsessive fear from the path.

Psychological tricks

1. Fighting negative thinking. They call this technique a “knife switch”, because the essence is to present your obsessive fears in the form of a switch as clearly and in detail as possible and just turn it off at the right time. The main thing is to imagine everything in your imagination.
2. Proper breathing. Psychologists say: "Inhale courage, exhale fear." Uniform breaths with a slight delay, and then exhalations, normalize the physical condition during an attack of fear. This will help you calm down.
3. Action response to an alarm. A difficult practice when a person "looks fear in the eye." If the patient is afraid to speak, then you need to put the patient in front of the public. It will be possible to overcome fear due to the “drive”.
4. We play a role. The patient is invited to play the role of a self-confident person. If this state is practiced in the form of a theatrical game, then the brain at some point may respond to it, and the obsessive fear will disappear.

aromatherapy

One of the causes of obsessive-compulsive disorder is stress and psychological fatigue. To prevent and treat such a problem, it is necessary to be able to relax, restore the emotional state. Aromatherapy helps with stress or depression. It must be combined with psychotherapy, because aromatherapy is just a way to relieve stress, but not solve the root problem.

Video: How to deal with intrusive thoughts

Sometimes people may have a mild form of obsessive-compulsive disorder or obsessive-compulsive disorder and not be aware of it. When the condition worsens, they are embarrassed to seek help. The video below shows ways to get rid of anxiety and anxiety. The notes will help you work on the problem yourself and improve your condition. The methods used are different, so you can choose the one that suits you best.

Prayer for obsessive thoughts

If you suffer from obsessive thoughts or compulsive rituals, you will be pleased to know what has now been achieved...

D. Schwartz, Four Steps Program

If you suffer from obsessive thoughts or compulsive rituals, you will be pleased to know that significant progress has now been made in the treatment of this condition.

For the past 20 years or so, cognitive behavioral therapy has been successfully used to treat obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).

The word "cognitive" comes from the Latin root "to know". Knowledge plays an important role in the fight against OCD. Knowledge helps to teach behavioral therapy techniques, a variation of which for OCD is exposure therapy.

In traditional exposure therapy, people with OCD are trained - under the guidance of a professional - to be near stimuli that cause or exacerbate intrusive thoughts and not respond to them in the usual compulsive manner, i.e. by performing rituals.

For example, a person with an obsessive fear of getting infected by touching something “dirty” is advised to hold a “dirty” object in their hands and then not wash their hands for a specified time, for example, 3 hours.

In our clinic, we use a slightly modified technique that allows the patient to perform CBT on their own.

We also call herfour steps. The basic principle is that knowing that your obsessive thoughts and compulsive urges are purely biological in nature will make it easier for you to deal with the fears that come with OCD.

And this, in turn, will help you to conduct behavioral therapy more effectively.

The four steps that the methodology includes:

Step 1. Name change

Step 2: Change your attitude towards intrusive thoughts

Step 3 Refocus

Step. 4 Revaluation

You need to follow these steps daily. The first three are especially important at the beginning of treatment.

Let's take a closer look at these 4 steps.

Step 1. Name change (relabeling or re-sticking of labels)

The first step is to learn to recognize the obsessive nature of thought or the compulsive nature of the urge to do something.

It is not necessary to do this purely formally, it is necessary to understand that the feeling that is bothering you so much at the moment is of an obsessive nature and is a symptom of a medical disorder.

The more you learn about the patterns of OCD, the easier it will be for you to understand this.

Whereas simple, day-to-day understanding of ordinary things happens almost automatically and is usually quite superficial, deep understanding requires effort. Conscious recognition and registration in the brain of an obsessive or compulsive symptom is needed.

You need to clearly state to yourself that this thought is obsessive, or that this urge is compulsive.

You need to try to develop what we call an outsider's attitude, which will help you recognize what is of real significance and what is just a symptom of OCD.

The purpose of step 1 is to label the thought that invaded your brain as obsessive and do so aggressively enough. Start calling them that, using the labels of obsession and compulsion.

For example, train yourself to speak “I don't think or feel that my hands are dirty. It's an obsession that they are dirty". Or “No, I don’t feel like I have to wash my hands, but this is a compulsive urge to perform the ritual”. You must learn to recognize intrusive thoughts as symptoms of OCD.

The main idea behind step 1 is to call obsessive thoughts and compulsive urges for what they really are. The feeling of anxiety that accompanies them is a false alarm that has little or no connection with reality.

As a result of numerous scientific studies, we now know that these obsessions are caused by a biological imbalance in the brain. Calling them what they really are - obsessions and compulsions - you will begin to understand that they do not mean what they want to seem. These are just false messages coming from the brain.

It is important, however, to understand that, calling an obsession an obsession will not get her to get rid of you.

In fact, the worst thing you can do is try to chase away the intrusive thoughts. It won't work because they have biological roots that are beyond our control.

What you really have control over is your actions. Through relabeling, you will begin to realize that however real they may seem, what they are telling you is not true. Your goal is to learn to control your behavior, not letting obsessions control you.

Recently, scientists have discovered that resistance to compulsions through behavioral therapy, over time, leads to a change in the biochemistry of the brain, bringing it closer to the biochemistry of a normal person, i.e. person without OCD.

But keep in mind that this process is not quick, it can take weeks or months, and requires patience and perseverance.

Attempts to quickly get rid of obsessions are doomed to failure and lead to disappointment, demoralization and stress. In fact, this can only make the situation worse by making the obsessions stronger.

Perhaps the most important thing to understand in behavior therapy is that you can control your response to intrusive thoughts, no matter how strong and frightening those thoughts are. Your goal should be to control your behavioral response to intrusive thoughts, not to control the thoughts themselves.

The next two steps will help you learn new ways to control your behavioral response to OCD symptoms.

Step 2: Downgrade

The essence of this step can be expressed in one phrase "It's not me - it's my OCD" . This is our battle cry.

It's a reminder that obsessive thoughts and compulsive urges don't matter, that they're fake messages sent from not-so-correctly functioning parts of the brain. Your behavioral therapy will help you figure this out.

Why can an obsessive desire, such as, for example, to return to once again check if the door is locked, or an obsessive thought that hands might be dirty with something, can be so strong?

If you know that compulsion has no meaning, why do you obey its demand?

Understanding why obsessive thoughts are so powerful and why they haunt you is a key factor in strengthening your will and ability to resist obsessive desires.

The purpose of step 2 is to correlate the intensity of the obsessive desire with its true cause and understand that the feeling of anxiety and discomfort that you experience is due to a biochemical imbalance in the brain.

This is OCD, a medical disorder. Recognizing this is the first step to a deep understanding that your thoughts are not at all what they seem. Learn not to take them as real.

Deep inside the brain is a structure called caudate nucleus . According to modern scientific concepts, the work of the caudate nucleus is disrupted in people with OCD.

The caudate nucleus acts as a processing or filtering center for very complex messages generated in the frontal parts of the brain, which, apparently, take part in the processes of thinking, planning and perceiving the world around.

Next to the caudate nucleus is another structure, the so-called shell .

Both of these structures form the so-called striatum , the function of which is somewhat reminiscent of the function of an automatic transmission in a car.

The striatum receives messages from various parts of the brain, from those that control movement, physical senses, thinking, and planning.

The caudate nucleus and shell act in synchrony, as does the automatic transmission, providing a smooth transition from one behavior to another.

Thus, if a person decides to take an action, alternative options and conflicting feelings are filtered out automatically so that the desired action can be performed quickly and efficiently. It's like a smooth yet quick gear change in a car.

Every day we often change behavior, smoothly and easily, usually without even thinking about it. And this is precisely due to the precise work of the caudate nucleus and the shell. In OCD, this clear work is disrupted by some defect in the caudate nucleus.

As a result of this malfunction, the front parts of the brain become hyperactive and require increased power.

It's like driving your car wheels into mud. You can press on the gas as much as you want, the wheels can spin wildly, but there is not enough grip to get out of the mud.

In OCD, a lot of energy is expended in the lower frontal cortex. It is this part of the brain, which performs the function of recognizing errors, that causes jamming in our “gearbox”. This is probably why people with OCD have a persistent feeling that “something is wrong.”

And you have to switch your "gears" forcibly, while for ordinary people this happens automatically.

Such a "manual" switching sometimes requires tremendous effort. However, unlike a car's gearbox, which is made of iron and cannot repair itself, a person with OCD can learn to shift easily with behavioral therapy.

Moreover, behavioral therapy will lead to the restoration of damaged parts of your "gearbox". We now know that you can change the biochemistry of your brain.

So, the essence of step 2 is to understand that the aggressiveness and cruelty of obsessive thoughts are of a medical nature, due to the biochemistry of the brain.

And that's whyintrusive thoughts don't go away on their own.

However, by doing behavioral therapy, such as the Four Steps, you can change this biochemistry.

It takes weeks, if not months, of hard work.

At the same time, understanding the role of the brain in generating obsessive thoughts will help you avoid doing one of the most destructive and demoralizing things that people with OCD almost always do, which is - try to "chase away" these thoughts.

There is nothing you can do to drive them away immediately. But remember: You are not required to comply with their requirements..

You don't have to treat them as important. Don't listen to them. You know what they really are. These are false signals generated by the brain due to a medical disorder called OCD. Remember this and avoid acting at the behest of intrusive thoughts.

The best thing you can do for the ultimate victory over OCD is leave these thoughts unattended and switch to some other behavior. This is the means to "shift gear" - change the behavior.

Trying to dismiss the thoughts will only pile stress upon stress, which will only make your OCD stronger.

Avoid performing rituals, trying in vain to feel that "everything is in order."

Knowing that the craving for that "everything is okay" feeling is caused by a chemical imbalance in your brain, you can learn to ignore that craving and move on.

Remember: "It's not me - it's my OCD!"

By refusing to act on the command of obsessive thoughts, you will change the settings of your brain so that the severity of obsessions will decrease.

If you do the forced action, you may experience relief, but only for a short time, but in the long run, you will only increase your OCD.

This is perhaps the most important lesson that OCD sufferers need to learn. This will help you avoid being fooled by OCD.

Steps 1 and 2 are usually done together to better understand what is really going on when intrusive thoughts cause so much pain.

Step 3 Refocus

This step is where the real work begins. In the beginning, you may think of it as "no pain, no gain". Mental training is like physical training.

In step 3, your job is to manually shift the stuck gear. With willpower and refocusing of attention, you will do what the caudate nucleus normally does easily and automatically when it tells you to move on to a different behavior.

Imagine a surgeon thoroughly washing his hands before surgery: he does not need to keep a watch in front of him to know when to finish washing. He finishes purely automatically when he "feels" that his hands have been washed enough.

But people with OCD may not have that sense of accomplishment even when the task is done. The autopilot is broken. Luckily, the Four Steps can usually fix it again.

The main idea when refocusing is to mix the focus of your attention with something else, even if only for a few minutes. For starters, you can choose some other action to replace the rituals. It is best to do something pleasant and useful. It's very good if you have a hobby.

For example, you might decide to go for a walk, do some exercise, listen to music, read, play on the computer, tie or throw the ball into the hoop.

When an obsessive thought or compulsive desire invades your mind, first of all label it as an obsession or compulsion, then treat it as a manifestation of OCD - a medical disorder.

After that, refocus your attention on some other behavior that you have chosen for yourself.

Start this refocusing by not accepting the obsession as something important. Say to yourself, “What I am experiencing right now is a symptom of OCD. I need to get down to business."

You need to train yourself for this new type of compulsive response by shifting your focus to something other than OCD.

The goal of treatment is to stop responding to the symptoms of OCD and accept that these unpleasant feelings will continue to bother you for a while. Start working next to them.

You will see that although the compulsive feeling is still there, it no longer controls your behavior.

Make your own decisions about what to do, don't let OCD do it for you.

Through this practice, you will restore your ability to make decisions. And the biochemical shifts in your brain will no longer command the parade.

15 minute rule

Refocusing is not easy at all. It would be dishonest to say that doing the intended actions without paying attention to the obsessive thought does not require significant effort and even enduring some pain.

But only by learning to resist OCD can you change your brain, and over time, reduce pain.

To help with this, we have developed a "rule of 15 minutes". Its idea is as follows.

If you have a strong compulsion to do something, don't do it right away. Give yourself some time to make a decision - preferably at least 15 minutes - after which you can return to the question and decide whether you need to do it or not.

If the obsession is very strong, first set yourself a time of at least 5 minutes. But the principle should always be the same: Never perform a compulsive action without a time delay.

Remember, this delay is not just passive waiting. This is the time to actively complete steps 1,2 and 3.

Then you need to switch to another behavior, something nice and/or constructive. When the scheduled delay time has elapsed, assess the intensity of the compulsive craving.

Even a slight decrease in intensity will give you the courage to wait a little longer. You will see that the more you wait, the more the obsession changes. Your goal should be 15 minutes or more.

As you train, with the same effort, you will get more and more reduction in the intensity of the obsessive desire. Gradually, you will be able to increase the delay time more and more.

What matters is not what you think, but what you do.

It is extremely important to shift the focus of attention from obsessions to some kind of intelligent activity. Don't wait until the obsessive thought or feeling leaves you. Don't think they will leave right now. And, by all means, don't do what the OCD tells you to do.

Instead, do something useful of your choice. You will see that the pause between the appearance of the obsessive desire and your decision leads to a decrease in the strength of the obsession.

And, just as important, if the obsession does not subside quickly enough, as it sometimes does, you will find that you have the power to control your actions in response to this false message from your brain.

The ultimate goal of refocusing is, of course, to never again perform compulsive behaviors in response to OCD demands. But the immediate task is to pause before performing any ritual.Learn not to let the feelings generated by OCD dictate your behavior.

Sometimes the obsessive desire can be too strong, and you still perform the ritual. But this is no reason to punish yourself.

Remember: If you work the Four Step Program and your behavior changes, your thoughts and feelings will also change.

If you couldn't resist and still performed the ritual after a time delay and an attempt to refocus, go back to step 1 and acknowledge that OCD was stronger this time.

Remind yourself “I washed my hands not because they were really dirty, but because the OCD required it. The ROC won this round, but next time I'll wait longer."

Thus, even the performance of compulsive actions may contain an element of behavioral therapy.

It is very important to understand that by calling compulsive behavior compulsive behavior, you are promoting behavioral therapy, and this is much better than performing rituals without calling them for what they really are.

Keep a journal

It is very helpful to keep a behavioral therapy log of your successful attempts at refocusing. Then, as you reread it, you'll see what pattern of behavior helped you best refocus.

Also, and just as important, a growing list of your successes will give you confidence. In the heat of fighting obsessions, it is not always easy to remember new successful tricks. Keeping a journal will help with this.

Record only your progress. There is no need to write down failures. And you need to learn to reward yourself for a job well done.

Step 4: Reassess

The purpose of the first three steps- use your knowledge of OCD as a medical disorder caused by a biochemical imbalance in the brain, to see that the feeling you are experiencing is not at all what it seems to be, to consider these thoughts and desires as extremely important, to not perform compulsive rituals, and to refocus on constructive behavior.

All three steps work together, and their cumulative effect is much greater than the effect of each separately. As a result, you will begin to rethink those thoughts and urges that previously would inevitably lead to the performance of compulsive rituals. With enough practice, you will eventually be able to pay significantly less attention to obsessive thoughts and desires.

We have used the concept of the "outside observer" developed by the 18th century philosopher Adam Smith to help you understand what you achieve with the Four Step Program.

Smith described the bystander as someone who is always next to us, who sees all our actions, surrounding circumstances, and for whom our feelings are available.

Using this approach, we can look at ourselves from the perspective of a disinterested person. Of course, this is sometimes very difficult, especially in a difficult situation and can require a lot of effort.

People with OCD should not be afraid of the hard work required to control the biological urges that invade consciousness. Strive to develop a sense of "outside observer" that will help you not to succumb to obsessive desires. You must use your knowledge that these obsessions are false signals that do not make any sense.

You must always remember"It's not me, it's my OCD". Although you cannot change how you feel overnight, you can change your behavior.

By changing your behavior, you will see that your feelings also change over time. Put the question like this:"Who's in charge here - me or the ROC?"

Even if an OCD bout overwhelms you into compulsions, be aware that it was just OCD and hold on tight next time.

If you persistently follow steps 1-3, then the fourth step is usually obtained automatically, those. you will see for yourself that what happened to you this time was nothing but another manifestation of OCD, a medical disorder, and the thoughts and desires inspired by it are of no real value.

In the future, it will be easier for you not to take them personally. With obsessive thoughts, you need to carry out the process of reassessment more actively.

Add two more steps to step 2 - two P - "anticipate" and "accept" .

When you feel the onset of an attack, be ready for it, don't let yourself be taken by surprise.

"Accept" - means that one should not waste energy in vain, scourging oneself for "bad" thoughts.

You know what causes them and what you should do.

Whatever the content of those thoughts—be it sexually inappropriate thoughts, or violent thoughts, or dozens of other variations—you know it can happen hundreds of times a day.

Learn not to react to them every time they come up, even if it's a new, unexpected thought. Don't let them knock you out.

By knowing the nature of your obsessive thoughts, you can recognize them early and start right away with step 1.

Remember: you can't get rid of the obsessive thought, but you don't have to pay attention to it. You shouldn't pay attention to her. Switch to a different behavior, and a thought left unattended will fade away by itself.

In step 2, you learn to perceive the disturbing intrusive thought as caused by OCD and due to a biochemical imbalance in the brain.

Do not torture yourself, there is no point in looking for some internal motives.

Simply accept that the obsession is in your mind, but it is not your fault, and this will help reduce the terrible stress that is usually caused by the repetitive obsession.

Always remember: “It's not me, it's my OCD. It’s not me, it’s just how my brain works.”

Don't beat yourself up for not being able to suppress that thought, human beings by nature just can't do it.

It is very important not to "chew" the obsessive thought. Do not be afraid that you will give in to the compulsive impulse and do something terrible. You won't do it because you don't really want to.

Leave all these judgments like that "only very bad people can have such terrible thoughts."

If the main problem is obsessive thoughts, and not rituals, then the “15 minute rule” can be reduced to one minute, even to 15 seconds.

Do not linger on the thought, even if she herself really wants to linger in your mind. You can, you must - move to a different thought, to a different behavior.

Refocusing is like a martial art. An obsessive thought or compulsive desire is very powerful, but it is also rather stupid. If you stand in their way, taking on all their power and trying to throw them out of your mind, you are doomed to failure.

You must step aside and switch to a different behavior, even though the obsession will still be with you for a while.

Learn to keep your cool in the face of a powerful enemy. This science goes beyond overcoming OCD.

By taking responsibility for your actions, you also take responsibility for your inner world, and, ultimately, for your life.

conclusions

As people with OCD, we need to train ourselves not to take intrusive thoughts and feelings to heart. We must understand that they are deceiving us.

Gradually, but persistently, we must change our response to these feelings. We now have a new perspective on our obsessions. We know that even strong and often recurring feelings are transient and will fade away if we don't act on their pressure.

And, of course, we must always remember that these feelings can become incredibly aggravated, up to a complete out of control, as soon as they succumb to them.

We must learn to recognize the intrusion of obsession into consciousness as early as possible, and immediately begin to act. By properly responding to OCD attacks, we will raise our self-esteem and develop a sense of freedom. We will strengthen our ability to make conscious choices.

The correct behavior will lead to a change in the biochemistry of our brain in the right direction. Ultimately, this path leads to freedom from OCD.published . If you have any questions on this topic, ask them to specialists and readers of our project .

P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness - together we change the world! © econet

15 ways to get rid of negative thoughts - it helped me! Have you ever been in a situation where you can’t get rid of obsessive thoughts about a person? About what he said or did, and how much it surprised or offended you? Sometimes when someone hurts us, our children, or loved ones, gossips behind our backs, or confounds us with their actions, we keep thinking about it for hours, sometimes even weeks.

You wash dishes, drive a car, walk your dog, but you can't forget how untruthful, angry or self-centered the words of your abuser were. His face, his words keep popping up in my head. Five hours, five days, five weeks later, he's still in your head - his face is in front of your eyes, even if you haven't spoken to him all this time.

How to learn to avoid such situations?

How to stop thinking about a person or an unpleasant incident - about what could or should have been done differently - when the same thoughts keep spinning in your head, rewinding and playing over and over again?

Maybe it's not about the person. The point is that you got or didn't get what you need, what you don't have, and what is wrong in your life. But most often we are tormented by thoughts about people who, in our eyes, are to blame for all this.

15 ways to get rid of negative thoughts. These thoughts poison our lives, because such experiences can cause both emotional and physical harm to a person. Research shows that toxic thoughts make our brain sick and unhappy. When our minds are constantly occupied with thoughts of bickering, resentment, or loss, it begins to marinate in a sea of ​​harmful chemicals and stress hormones that are catalysts for virtually every disease in the world. Scientists are increasingly reporting that negative thoughts play a big role in diseases such as depression, cancer, and heart and autoimmune diseases.

Moreover, it's just plain annoying. It’s as if you are being pulled into a rotating carousel, on which it’s fun to scroll a couple of times, but then you start to feel sick and your head suddenly goes around. You want to get off, but you can't.

We try very hard to avoid everything that is poisonous: we buy organic products, we try not to eat junk food, we get rid of chemicals. We look for the freshest products, use organic cleaning agents and natural cosmetics. But with all this, we pay very little attention to purifying our thoughts. How can you get rid of negative emotions and memories?

15 ways to get rid of negative thoughts. Choose the method that seems most effective to you and act:

1. Be silent and pause.

This will give you the opportunity to cool down a little, calm down and choose the most reasonable tactics for resolving the conflict. And sometimes, over time, what annoys us is forgotten on its own.

2. Wait and see what happens next.

In conflict situations, very often you want to stand up for yourself and give your offender a fitting rebuff. That is why we worry so much about what to say or do in such cases.

3. Do not play the game "Who is to blame?"

Taking apart events that happened in the past and trying to decide who is to blame (even if you blame yourself) is counterproductive. Bad things or misunderstandings most often happen as a result of a whole series of events. It's like a domino effect. In the end result, it is impossible to blame only one person. First one thing happens, then another, then a third. And so what happens happens.

4. Don't get into the other person's mood.

5. Start with the biggest problem.

Meditation teacher Norman Fisher says that no matter what happens to us, anger is always the biggest problem. It creates a cloud of emotions that makes it difficult to give a balanced and convincing answer. In conflict situations, the biggest problem is anger. Work on yourself - meditate, do gymnastics, go for a walk. Talk as little as possible and give yourself time to cool down. Do whatever you want - but before you deal with someone, deal with yourself.

6. Anger warps your mind.

It is impossible to think clearly and look for a creative and thoughtful approach to solving a difficult situation if you are angry.

7. Don't try to understand the other person's actions.

Ask yourself: if another person tried to understand what you think or why you do what you do, how close to the truth will their guesses be? Nobody but you knows what's going on in your head. So why try to understand what your interlocutor is thinking? Most likely, you will be wrong, which means that you are just wasting your time.

8. Your thoughts are not facts.

In other words, don't believe everything you think. Our body is acutely aware of our emotions - fear, tension, anxiety or stress. We experience emotions on a physical level and often take our feelings as confirmation that our thoughts are fact.

9. How can I use this situation for personal growth?

Meditation teacher and psychologist Tara Brach argues that dwelling on anger, getting offended by someone’s words or actions, judging the interlocutor, and getting angry at the way we were treated, we replenish our personal stock of suffering. Situation + our reaction = suffering. Dealing with our feelings and asking why we are so affected by this or that situation and what these feelings say about ourselves is a great chance to learn something new about ourselves. Situation + reflections + mental presence “here and now” = inner growth. Focus on your inner development.

10. Never let others confuse you. Even to himself.

11. What was, has already passed.

Remembering the past, we often try to understand what could have been done differently in order to prevent a quarrel and its unpleasant outcome. But what happened yesterday is just as much in the past as what happened a thousand years ago or during the time of the Mayans. We cannot change what happened then, and we cannot change what happened a week ago.

12. Learn to forgive.

For your own good. We are very devoted to our sorrows and thoughts about all the bad things that happened to us. Yes, it was. Yes, it was terrible. But is it really the only thing that shapes you as a person? We forgive others not only for their own sake. We forgive in order to free ourselves from our personal suffering, to stop holding on to the past, and to move on with our lives.

13. Transport yourself to another space.

Self-awareness teacher and psychologist Trish Magiyari recommends using visualization. Studies show that this method is very effective in helping to get rid of negative thoughts that inflame our consciousness. Personally, this image always helps me: imagine that you are at the bottom of a deep blue ocean and watch how everything floats by. Watch how your thoughts scatter.

14. Respond to the offender with kindness.

Here's what healer Wanda Lasseter-Lundi advises you to do in situations where thoughts about your abuser drive you crazy: “Imagine how you send a beautiful ball of white light towards this person. Put it inside this ball. Surround him with rays and keep the light around him until your anger evaporates.

15. Take a minute and a half break.

To free the mind, you need to break the train of your thoughts. Neuropsychiatrist Dan Segal states that “in 90 seconds, emotion will rise and fall like a wave near a shore.” You only need 90 seconds to get out of any state. Give yourself 90 seconds - inhale and exhale 15 times - to not think about the person or situation that upsets you. This will help break the vicious cycle—and with it, the power that your negative thoughts have over you.

Well, are you feeling better?

Usually people regard thought as something unimportant,

therefore they are very little choosy when accepting a thought.

But from the accepted right thoughts everything good is born,

from the accepted false thoughts all evil is born.

Thought is like a ship's rudder: from a small rudder,

from this insignificant board dragging behind the ship,

depends on the direction and, for the most part, fate

the whole huge machine.

St. Ignaty Brianchaninov,

Bishop of the Caucasus and Black Sea

During the crisis periods of life, almost everyone suffers from the invasion of obsessive thoughts. More precisely, obsessive thoughts are the form in which false ideas come to us that try to take power over us. Every day, our consciousness is subject to their active attacks. This prevents us from soberly assessing the situation, making plans and believing in their implementation, because of these thoughts it is difficult for us to concentrate and find reserves to overcome problems, these thoughts are exhausting, and often lead to despair.

Here are some thoughts that come up when breaking up:

I won't have anyone else. I don't need anyone (don't need me)

He was the best and I will not find such (such) again

I can't live without him/her

Everything that happened is only my fault

I won't be able to build a relationship with anyone because I don't respect myself anymore

· There will be no joy in the future. Real life is over, and now there will be only survival

Better not to live at all than like this. I see no point in such a life. I don't see any point or hope

I can't trust anyone now

How will I tell my parents about this?

Everyone is judging me now.

· I can't do anything. I will not be able to become normal and respected.

And similar thoughts. They pervade our consciousness. They don't let us go even for a second. They make us suffer far more than the events that triggered the crisis.

There are a number of mental illnesses (depression of organic origin, schizophrenia, etc.), in which obsessive thoughts are present in the complex of symptoms. With such diseases, we know only one possibility of help - pharmacotherapy. In this case, it is necessary to consult a psychiatrist for treatment.

However, most people who suffer from intrusive thoughts during a crisis do not have psychopathological disorders. With the help of our advice, they will be able to successfully get rid of these thoughts and get out of the crisis.

What is the nature of intrusive thoughts?

From the point of view of science, obsessive thoughts (obsessions) are the incessant repetition of unwanted ideas and inclinations, doubts, desires, memories, fears, actions, ideas, etc., which cannot be eliminated by an effort of will. The real problem in these thoughts is exaggerated, enlarged, distorted. As a rule, there are several of these thoughts, they line up in a vicious circle that we cannot break. And we run in circles like squirrels in a wheel.

The more we try to get rid of them, the more they become. And then there is a sense of their violence. Very often (but not always), obsessive-compulsive states are accompanied by depressive emotions, painful thoughts, and feelings of anxiety.

To overcome this problem, we need to answer the following questions:

What is the nature of intrusive thoughts? Where do they come from?

How to deal with intrusive thoughts?

And here it turns out that psychology has no exact answer to this question.

Many psychologists, speculatively and without evidence, have tried to explain the cause of obsessive thoughts. Different schools of psychology are still at war with each other on this issue, but most still associate obsessive thoughts with fears. True, this does not clarify how to deal with them. They tried to find at least some method that would effectively deal with them, but in the last century they found only a method of pharmacotherapy, which for a while can help to cope with fear, and, accordingly, with obsessive thoughts. The only bad thing is that it is far from always effective. The cause remains, and pharmacotherapy only temporarily relieves the symptom. Accordingly, in the vast majority of cases, pharmacotherapy is ineffective as a method of dealing with obsessive thoughts.

There is another old way that creates the illusion of a solution to the problem, but only makes it very serious. Despite this, this method is often resorted to. We are talking about alcohol, drugs, crazy entertainment, extreme activities, etc.

Yes, for a very short time you can turn off obsessive thoughts in this way, but then they will “turn on” anyway, and with increased force. We will not dwell on explaining the inefficiency of such methods. Everyone knows this from their own experience.

Classical psychology does not provide recipes for effective struggle with obsessive thoughts because it does not see the nature of these thoughts. To put it simply, it is quite difficult to fight the enemy if he is not visible and it is not even clear who he is. Schools of classical psychology, arrogantly crossed out the vast experience of spiritual struggle accumulated by previous generations, began to rebuild certain concepts. These concepts are different for all schools, but the main thing is that the cause of everything is sought either in the faceless and incomprehensible unconscious of the person himself, or in some physical and chemical interactions of dendrites, axons and neurons, or in frustrated needs for self-realization, etc. P. At the same time, there are no clear explanations of what obsessive thoughts are, the mechanism of their influence, the laws of their appearance.

Meanwhile, answers to questions and successful solutions to the problem have been known for thousands of years. An effective way to deal with obsessive thoughts in a mentally healthy person exists!

We all know that the strength of obsessive thoughts is that they can influence our consciousness without our will, and our weakness is that we have almost no influence on obsessive thoughts. That is, behind these thoughts stands an independent will, different from ours. The very name "obsessive thoughts" already suggests that they are "imposed" by someone from the outside.

We are often surprised by the paradoxical content of these thoughts. That is, logically, we understand that the content of these thoughts is not entirely justified, not logical, not dictated by a sufficient number of real external circumstances, or even simply absurd and devoid of any common sense, but, nevertheless, we cannot resist these thoughts. Also, often when such thoughts arise, we ask ourselves the question: “How did I think of this?”, “Where did this thought come from?”, “This thought got into my head?”. We cannot find an answer to this, but for some reason we still consider it ours. At the same time, an obsessive thought has a huge impact on us. Everyone knows that a person, pursued by obsessions, maintains a critical attitude towards them, realizing all their absurdity and alienation to his mind. When he tries to stop them by an effort of will, this does not bring results. This means that we are dealing with an independent mind, different from ours.

Whose mind and will is it that is directed against us?

The holy fathers of the Orthodox Church say that a person in such situations is dealing with an attack by demons. I want to clarify right away that none of them perceived demons as primitively as those who did not think about their nature perceive them. These are not those funny hairy ones with horns and hooves! They have no visible appearance at all, allowing them to operate invisibly. They can be called differently: energies, spirits of malice, essences. Talking about their appearance is meaningless, but we know their main weapon is a lie.

So, it is the evil spirits, according to the holy fathers, that are the cause of these thoughts, which we take for our own. It's hard to break habits. And we are so used to considering all our thoughts, all our internal dialogues and even internal battles as ours and only ours. But in order to win these battles, you need to take their side in them, against the enemy. And for this you need to understand that these thoughts are not ours, they are imposed on us from the outside by a force hostile to us. Demons act like commonplace viruses, while trying to remain unnoticed and unrecognized. Moreover, these entities act regardless of whether you believe in them or not.

Saint Ignatius (Bryanchaninov) wrote about the nature of these thoughts in the following way: “The spirits of malice with such cunning wage war against a person that the thoughts and dreams they bring to the soul seem to be born in itself, and not from an evil spirit alien to it, acting and trying together take cover."

The criterion for determining the true source of our thoughts is very simple. If a thought deprives us of peace, it is from demons. “If you immediately experience embarrassment, oppression of the spirit from any movement of the heart, then this is no longer from above, but from the opposite side - from the evil spirit,” said the righteous John of Kronstadt. Isn't that the effect of obsessive thoughts that torment us in a crisis situation?

True, we are not always able to correctly assess our condition. The famous modern psychologist V.K. Nevyarovich writes about this in his book Therapy of the Soul: “The lack of constant internal work on self-control, spiritual sobriety and conscious control of one’s thoughts, described in detail in the ascetic patristic literature, also affects. It can also be assumed, with a greater or lesser degree of obviousness, that some thoughts, which, by the way, are always almost felt as alien and even coerced, violent, really have a nature alien to man, being demonic. According to patristic teaching, a person is often unable to distinguish the true source of his thoughts, and the soul is permeable to the demonic elements. Only experienced ascetics of holiness and piety, with a bright soul already purified by prayer and fasting, are able to detect the approach of darkness. The souls covered with sinful darkness often do not feel and do not see this, because on the dark, the dark is poorly distinguished.

It is thoughts “from the evil one” that support all our addictions (alcohol, gambling, painful neurotic addiction to certain people, etc.). Thoughts that we mistake for our own push people to suicide, despair, resentment, unforgiveness, envy, passions, indulge pride, unwillingness to admit their mistakes. They obsessively offer us, disguised as our thoughts, to do very bad deeds in relation to others, not to work on correcting ourselves. These thoughts prevent us from embarking on the path of spiritual development, inspire us with a sense of superiority over others, etc. Such thoughts are these “spiritual viruses”.

It is the spiritual nature of such thoughts-viruses that is confirmed by the fact that, for example, doing a charitable deed, praying, going to church is often difficult for us. We feel internal resistance, we make great efforts to resist what seems to be our own thoughts, which find a huge number of excuses not to do this. Although it seems that it is difficult to get up early in the morning and go to the temple? But no, anywhere we get up early quickly, and to go to the temple it will be hard for us to get up. According to a Russian proverb: “Although the church is close, it is slippery to walk; and the tavern is far away, but I walk slowly. It is also easy for us to sit in front of the TV, but it is much more difficult to force ourselves to pray for the same time. These are just some examples. In fact, our whole life consists of a constant choice between good and evil. And, having analyzed the choices we make, everyone can see the effect of these “viruses” on a daily basis.

This is how spiritually experienced people viewed the nature of obsessive thoughts. And their advice on overcoming these thoughts worked flawlessly! The criterion of experience unambiguously indicates that the Church's understanding of this issue is correct.

How to overcome intrusive thoughts?

How, in accordance with this correct understanding, to overcome obsessive thoughts?

The first steps are:

1. Recognize that you have obsessive thoughts and the need to get rid of them!

Make a firm decision to get rid of this slavery so that you can continue to build your life without these viruses.

2. Take responsibility

I want to note that if we accept these obsessive thoughts from the outside, do certain actions under their influence, then it is we who are responsible for these actions and the consequences of these actions. It is impossible to shift the responsibility to obsessive thoughts, because we accepted them and acted in accordance with them. Not thoughts acted, but we ourselves.

Let me explain with an example: if the leader is trying to manipulate his assistant, then if he succeeded, and the leader made an erroneous decision because of this, it is the leader, and not his assistant, who will be responsible for this decision.

3. Muscle relaxation

All available means of dealing with obsessive thoughts, if they are caused by fears and anxieties, is muscle relaxation. The fact is that when we can completely relax our body, relieve muscle tension, then at the same time anxiety will definitely decrease and fears will recede, and, accordingly, in most cases, the intensity of obsessive thoughts will also decrease. Doing the exercise is quite simple:

Lie down or sit down. Relax your body as much as possible. Start by relaxing the muscles of the face, then the muscles of the neck, shoulders, torso, arms, legs, finishing with the fingers and toes. Try to feel that you do not have the slightest tension in any muscle of the body. Feel it. If you could not relax any area or muscle group, then first strain this area as much as possible, and then relax. Do this several times, and this area or muscle group will surely relax. In a state of complete relaxation, you need to be from 15 to 30 minutes. It is good to imagine yourself in a comfortable place in nature.

Do not worry about how successfully you achieve relaxation, do not suffer and do not strain - let relaxation occur at your own pace. If you feel that extraneous thoughts visit you during the exercise, try to remove extraneous thoughts from your mind, switching your attention from them to visualizing a place in nature.

Do this exercise several times throughout the day. This will help you significantly reduce anxiety and fears.

4. Switch attention!

It is better to switch attention to what helps to effectively combat these obsessive entities. You can switch attention to helping people, creative activities, social activities, housework. Our ancestors believed that it is very good for the expulsion of obsessive thoughts to engage in useful physical work.

5. Do not self-hypnosis by repeating these thoughts to yourself!

Everyone is well aware of the power of self-hypnosis. Self-hypnosis can sometimes help in very severe cases. Self-hypnosis can relieve pain, treat psychosomatic disorders, and significantly improve the psychological state. Due to its ease of use and pronounced effectiveness, it has been used in psychotherapy since ancient times.

Unfortunately, self-hypnosis of negative statements is often observed. A person who has found himself in a crisis situation, to himself and aloud, constantly unconsciously pronounces statements that not only do not help get out of the crisis, but also worsen the condition. For example, a person constantly complains to acquaintances or makes a statement to himself:

I was left alone.

I won't have anyone else.

I don't want to live.

I will not be able to return it, etc.

Thus, the mechanism of self-hypnosis is turned on, which really leads a person to certain feelings of helplessness, longing, despair, diseases, mental disorders.

It turns out that the more often a person repeats these negative attitudes, the more negatively they affect the thoughts, feelings, sensations, emotions, ideas of this person. You don't have to keep repeating this. By doing this, you not only do not help yourself, but also drive yourself deep into the crisis swamp. What to do?

If you catch yourself repeating these spells often, then do the following:

Change the setting to the exact opposite and repeat it many times more often.

For example, if you constantly think and say that life ended in divorce, then carefully and clearly say 100 times that life goes on and will get better and better every day. It is better to do such suggestions several times a day. And you will really feel the effect very quickly. When making positive statements, avoid the "not" prefix. Example: not “I will not be lonely in the future”, but “I will still be with my loved one in the future”. This is a very important rule for making statements. Pay attention to this. It is important. Do not make statements about what is not achievable, ethical. You should not give yourself installations to raise self-esteem.

6. Try to find the hidden benefits of the state you are in! Skip these benefits!

Paradoxical as it may seem, but a person who is constantly attacked by heavy, exhausting obsessive thoughts, very often finds imaginary benefits for himself in their presence. Most often, a person cannot and does not want to admit these benefits even to himself, because the very idea that he has benefits from the source of suffering seems blasphemous to him. In psychology, this concept is called "secondary benefit." In this case, the secondary benefit is the side benefit in this situation from the existing torment and suffering, which exceeds the gain from solving the problem and further well-being. It is impossible to enumerate all the possible benefits that a person receives from his own suffering. Here are some of the more common ones.

1. “He was the best and I won’t find such (such) more »

Benefit: No need to change yourself. Why strive for something? Why look for mistakes in a relationship? There won't be anything else anyway! Why seek God's help? It's all over anyway!

If you agree with this thought, then you can do nothing and get the sympathy of others. And if a person is actively involved in the struggle for happiness, then he will no longer receive such sympathy for himself.

2. “There will be no joy in the future. Real life is over, and now there will be only survival.”

Benefit: no need to think about how to get out of the situation (life is over), no need to think too much, no need to work. Self-pity appears, the severity of the situation (imagined) justifies all mistakes and wrong actions. There is a pleasant sympathy of others and attention to yourself from friends and relatives

3. “Better not to live at all than like this. I see no point in such a life. I don't see any point or hope."

If there is hope, then it seems to be necessary to take steps. But you don't want to do this. Therefore, it is easiest to come to terms with this thought, but do not try anything. Sit down and feel sorry for yourself, accepting the role of the victim.

4. "Everything that happened is only my fault"

Benefit: no need to think about real mistakes, look for ways to recover, think objectively about the reasons that led to such an ending. Just give up, but don’t think about it, don’t admit that you built illusions in relation to this person (taking the blame on yourself, you don’t have to think about it).

Such obsessive thoughts are replaced by similar ones: “I have always been unlucky / unlucky, I was born under an unfortunate star” ... I.e. it is more profitable to transfer responsibility for one's own life to circumstances or events, and to persuade oneself to do nothing to improve the situation and its solution, because again there is an excuse.

5. “I won’t be able to build a relationship with anyone because I don’t respect myself anymore. I can't do anything. I won't be able to become normal and respected."

Benefit: no need to think about what needs to be done to be respected. Self-pity and self-complacency give reason to do nothing for this.

In this case, agreeing with the idea that we are unworthy or flawed, we give ourselves the opportunity not to strive for anything, treating others as a consumer, we are looking for only sympathy or praise.

7. “Everyone is judging me now”

Everyone cannot judge. But if you agree with this thought, then this is a great reason to feel sorry for yourself, not to seek help from people. And again passively go with the flow, without remaking yourself

8. "I can't trust anyone else"

Benefit: no need to understand the reasons for betrayal, no need to find reasons, no need to try to correct yourself and get out. No need to learn to select friends for deeds, not words. There is no need to change the communication environment to a better one, in which there is a place for trust. Because if you do not change yourself, then the social circle remains the same, therefore, the circle closes, and there is no way out.

9. “I can’t live without him (her)” or “How can I be alone now?”

It is difficult to realize our own dependence on a particular person and the infantile or, conversely, overprotective position we take in relationships. These thoughts arise when personal space was completely subordinated to the Idol (idol). (It is not for nothing that many of these idolaters write the pronoun denoting Kumir with a capital letter: He, She, or even HE, SHE.) It is beneficial in this situation not to become an adult, changing your own attitudes, remaining immature, not taking responsibility for your life. With a hyper-protective position, it is beneficial to realize one's significance and “knowing everything” as it is better for someone, without taking into account the opinion of this person.

10. “How will I tell my parents about this?”

We must learn to deal with false shame. Reconcile too. Learn to be an adult and take responsibility. And this is exactly what you don't want! Yes, and thus the final decision of the issue is delayed. It's hard to admit to yourself that everything is over in a relationship. It's hard to point.

Think about what "benefits" you can have by agreeing with these thoughts. Do not find anything positive in them. Typical thoughts are listed at the beginning of the article. Be more specific what you mean. If you want to justify yourself, feel sorry for yourself, do not take any steps, do not take responsibility for your decisions, then in this case obsessive thoughts will always offer you their services and justify all your actions. But we must remember that for these "services" of obsessive thoughts, you will have to pay with them by further dependence on them.

When looking for "benefits", everything that is "uncovered" looks very unattractive, and a person ceases to be the way he WANTS to see himself. This process is very painful, however, if the secondary “benefit” is found and realized, you will be able to find both other ways to implement it, and to eradicate this “benefit”, as well as find a successful solution from your own predicament.

Once again I want to note that all secondary "benefits" are hidden from consciousness. Now you can't see them. You can understand and reveal them only by an impartial analysis of your actions, thoughts and desires.

Pay attention to the contradiction between your interests, your logic and those thoughts that are trying to take possession of you! Assess their paradoxicality, irrelevance, logical inconsistency. Evaluate the consequences and disadvantages of the actions that following these thoughts can lead to. Reflect on this. Think about whether you see in these thoughts a direct inconsistency with what your consciousness tells you. Surely you will find many inconsistencies between obsessive thoughts and your consciousness.

Recognize that these thoughts are not yours, that they are the result of an external attack of other entities on you. As long as you consider obsessive thoughts as your own, you will not be able to oppose them and take measures to neutralize them. You can't neutralize yourself!

8. Don't try to defeat intrusive thoughts by arguing with them!

Intrusive thoughts have one feature: the more you resist them, the more force they attack.

In psychology, the phenomenon of the "White Monkey" is described, which proves the difficulty of dealing with external influences within the mind. The essence of the phenomenon is as follows: When one person says to another “Don't think about the white monkey”, then that person starts thinking about the white monkey. Active struggle with obsessive thoughts also leads to this result. The more you tell yourself that you can do it, the less you can do it.

Understand that this state cannot be overcome by willpower. You cannot counter this attack on equal footing. This situation can be likened to how a heavily drunk person sticks to physically weaker passers-by. Moreover, the more attention is paid to him, called to order, asked not to pester, the more he does this and even begins to behave aggressively. What is the best thing to do in this case? Ignore passing by. In our case, it is necessary, without entering into conflict with these thoughts, to simply switch your attention from them to something else (more pleasant). As soon as we switch attention and ignore obsessions, they lose their power for a while. The more often we ignore them immediately after their appearance, the less they annoy us.

Here is what the holy fathers say about this: “You are used to talking to yourself and you think to argue thoughts, but they are reflected by the Jesus Prayer and silence in your thoughts” (St. Anthony of Optina). “The crowd of tempting thoughts becomes more relentless if you let them slow down in your soul, and even more so if you also enter into negotiations with them. But if they are pushed away from the first time by a strong exertion of will, rejection and turning to God, then they will immediately leave and leave the atmosphere of the soul clean” (St. Theophan the Recluse). “A thought, like a thief, comes to you - and you open the door for him, bring him into the house, start a conversation with him, and then he robs you. Is it possible to start conversations with the enemy? They not only avoid conversations with him, but they also lock the door tightly so that he does not enter ”(strets Paisius Svyatogorets).

9. The most powerful weapon against intrusive thoughts-

The world-famous physician, Nobel Prize winner in Physiology or Medicine for his work on vascular suture and transplantation of blood vessels and organs, Dr. Alexis Carrel said: “Prayer is the most powerful form of energy emitted by a person. It is as real a force as the earth's gravity. As a doctor, I have seen patients who were not helped by any therapeutic treatment. They managed to recover from diseases and melancholy only thanks to the calming effect of prayer ... When we pray, we connect ourselves with the inexhaustible life force that sets the entire Universe in motion. We pray that at least some of this power will be transferred to us. Turning to God in sincere prayer, we improve and heal our soul and body. It is impossible that at least one moment of prayer does not bring a positive result to any man or woman.

The spiritual explanation for the help of prayer in this problem is very simple. God is stronger than Satan, and our prayerful appeal to Him for help drives out evil spirits that “sing” their false monotonous songs in our ears. Everyone can be convinced of this, and very quickly. You don't need to be a monk to do this.

In a difficult moment of life

Do sadness cramp in the heart:

One wonderful prayer

I repeat by heart.

There is a grace

In consonance with the words of the living,

And breathes incomprehensible

Holy beauty in them.

From the soul, how the burden will roll,

Doubt is far away

And believe and cry

And it's so easy, easy...

(Mikhail Lermontov).

Like any good deed, prayer must be done with reason and effort.

We must consider the enemy that he inspires us, and direct the weapon of prayer towards him. That is, the word of the prayer should be the opposite of the obsessive thoughts suggested to us. “Make it a law for yourself every time trouble happens, that is, an attack by the enemy in the form of a bad thought or feeling, not to be content with one reflection and disagreement, but to add prayer to this until opposite feelings and thoughts are formed in the soul,” says St. Theophan.

For example, if the essence of obsessive thoughts is murmuring, pride, unwillingness to accept the circumstances in which we find ourselves, then the essence of prayer should be humility: “May the will of God be done!”

If the essence of obsessive thoughts is despondency, despair (and this is an inevitable consequence of pride and grumbling), a grateful prayer will help here - “Glory to God for everything!”.

If the memory of a person is tormenting, let us simply pray for him: “Lord, bless him!” Why will this prayer help you? Because from your prayer for this person, he will benefit, and evil spirits do not wish good to anyone. Therefore, seeing that good comes from their work, they will stop torturing you with images of this person. One woman who took this advice said that prayer helped a lot, and she literally felt next to her the impotence and annoyance of the evil spirits that had overcome her before.

Naturally, different thoughts can overcome us at the same time (there is nothing faster than a thought), so the words of different prayers can also be combined: “Lord, have mercy on this man! Glory to Thee for everything!"

You need to pray continuously, until victory, until the invasion of thoughts stops, and peace and joy reign in the soul. Read more about how to pray on our website.

10. Sacraments of the Church

Another way to get rid of these entities is the Sacraments of the Church. First of all, this is, of course, confession. It is at confession, regrettably repenting of sins, that we seem to wash off all the dirt that has stuck to ourselves, including obsessive thoughts.

It would seem, but what are we to blame?

Spiritual laws say unequivocally: if we feel bad, then we have sinned. Because only sin hurts. Those same murmurings about the situation (and this is nothing more than murmuring against God or resentment against Him), despondency, resentment against a person - all these are sins that poison our souls.

When we confess, we do two very useful things for our soul. First, we take responsibility for our condition and tell ourselves and God that we will try to change it. Secondly, we call evil evil, and evil spirits most of all do not like reproof - they prefer to act on the sly. In response to our deeds, God, at the moment the priest reads the permissive prayer, does His work - He forgives us our sins and drives out the evil spirits that besiege us.

Another powerful tool in the struggle for our soul is the sacrament. By partaking of the Body and Blood of Christ, we receive grace-filled strength to fight evil within ourselves. “This Blood removes and drives away demons from us and calls Angels to us. Demons flee from where they see the Sovereign Blood, and Angels flock there. Shed on the Cross, this Blood washed the whole universe. This Blood is the salvation of our souls. The soul is washed by it,” says St. John Chrysostom.

“The Most Holy Body of Christ, when well received, is a weapon for those at war, a return for those who are moving away from God, a return, strengthens the weak, gladdens the healthy, heals illnesses, preserves health, thanks to it we are more easily corrected, in labors and sorrows we become more patient, in love - more ardent, in knowledge - more refined, in obedience - more ready, for the actions of grace - more receptive" - ​​St. Gregory the Theologian.

I cannot assume the mechanism of this deliverance, but I know for sure that dozens of people I know, including my patients, got rid of obsessive thoughts precisely after the Sacraments.

In general, grace after the Sacraments was felt by hundreds of millions of people. It is they, their experience, that tells us that we should not ignore the help of God and His Church with these entities. I want to note that some people after the Sacraments got rid of obsessions not forever, but for a while. This is natural, as it is a long and difficult struggle.

11. Get a grip on yourself!

Idleness, self-pity, apathy, despair, depression are the most nutritious substrates for growing and multiplying obsessive thoughts. That is why try to constantly be in the right business, be physically active, pray, watch your physical condition, get enough sleep, do not maintain these states in yourself, do not look for benefits in them.

Mikhail Khasminsky, crisis psychologist)

It turns out that there are a number of methods that will help block the appearance of bad thoughts or deal with them if they have already come. Most of these methods are offered by the American psychologist Danielle Wegner, who has devoted decades of her life to the problem.

1. Switch

Don't try not to think of a white monkey - think of a black one. And better - about the purple flamingo. Try to switch your mind to some other subject that you also like to think about very much, but which at the same time has positive connotations. Get yourself a few “continued” thoughts that raise more and more questions and the need for answers to them - which means they draw you into a completely different stream of thoughts. Is it true that Brad Pitt has silicone muscles? I read about it somewhere. But if so, how does he use them? After all, silicone is not able to contract like real muscles - or is there some way to make it do it? And there is also a conspiracy theory, according to which our Earth is really flat, and only a clique of evil scientists has been convincing us for several centuries that it is spherical. Wait, what about satellite images and records from space? And they are falsified by the same scientists. But what about the poles? There is only one pole - the North one, it is in the center of the Earth, which is flat as a disk, and along the edges of the disk there are glaciers that scientists pass off as Antarctica. And so on - soon the seething stream of this nonsense will take you in a completely new direction *.

* S. Hayes "Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy". New Harbinger Publications, 2005.

2. Avoid stress

Some people believe that a strong impression will help them cope with intrusive thoughts - for example, a scandal with neighbors or a naked run through a winter city at night. However, studies show that the more you shake up your emotions, the weaker it is before the "alien invasion" of uninvited thoughts. On the contrary, try to calm down and rest - the more strength you have and the better your brain is, the more chances you have to repel an attack *.

* D. Wegner "Setting free the bears: escape from thought suppression". American Psychologist, 2011.

3. Set aside bad thoughts

Agree with an obsessive thought - you will definitely pay attention to it, but only later. Include in your daily schedule "half an hour for painful thoughts" - but not before bedtime, but, for example, at the height of the working day. Thinking about what is oppressing you during your lunch break will quickly distract you from problems, plunging back into work. Sooner or later, the subconscious mind will get used to the fact that obsessive thoughts have their own time with strictly defined limits, and will stop pestering you at other times. Now you can think about how to exterminate annoying thoughts at this time * D

4. Focus on the obsession

Once upon a time, a patient came to the great physician Abu Ali ibn Sina, who complained that his eyelid was twitching. Ibn Sina prescribed him an extremely dubious remedy: every hour to begin to blink on purpose with an obstinate eyelid. The patient grinned - but promised to strictly comply with the prescribed. A few days later he came to thank the doctor. Like the remedy prescribed by Ibn Sina, this method works on the principle of "by the contrary": when an obsessive thought comes to you, try to force yourself to think it over from all sides, turn it this way and that, make yourself afraid that it will slip away from you - and you will soon feel that her grip is weakening and she herself would be glad to escape from you *.

* D. Wegner "Setting free the bears: escape from thought suppression". American Psychologist, 2011.

5. Recognize the inevitability of a bad thought

Another way, somewhat similar to the previous one, is to replace the fear of the appearance of an indestructible thought with complete indifference to it. Learn to think of it as something external: for example, if it is the thought that a loved one left you, get used to the idea that this thought has nothing to do with him (or her), but exists on its own: here now I will go to bed, and my number one Thought will come to me again. Accustom yourself to the fact that this thought does not develop and does not tell you anything new - it just comes and goes, as twelve o'clock at night or winter come and go. And very soon you will feel that she is really leaving *.

* H. Russ "The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living: A Guide to ACT". Random House, 2007.

6. Meditate

Meditation is a great way to organize your mind by bringing your thoughts under control. Practice it daily, trying to achieve a state of complete thoughtlessness. This is not easy, but if you learn how to do it, you will be able to induce this state at will, including it at the time of the day when you are most prone to bad thoughts, or in the situation when you become most defenseless against them. If a bad thought does not receive positive reinforcement in the form of your willingness to devote your brain resources to it, it begins to weaken - and soon fades away*.

* D. Orman "Stop Negative Thinking: How To Stop Worrying, Relieve Stress, and Become a Happy Person Again". TRO Productions, 2003.

7. Think about your goals

How is a bad thought different from gas? Gas, as we know from a physics textbook, occupies the entire volume provided, and a bad thought is not yet provided ... It teaches us to concentrate on it, forgetting that there is so much good in the world that it is much more pleasant to think about. Obsessive thoughts are especially fond of people who have neither a major lifelong goal nor an interesting hobby. Take yourself out of the state of sad thoughts, thinking about the path to success, about what will bring you satisfaction. If you make an effort, you will gradually be able to accustom yourself to positive dreams*.

* D. Wegner "Setting free the bears: escape from thought suppression". American Psychologist, 2011.