Stories of how people found out that they were sick with HIV. AIDS: the truth about a terrible disease
History of Gracia Violeta
Confession
My name is Gracia Violeta, I am 28 years old. In 2000, I found out that I had the acquired immunodeficiency virus, which is the virus that causes AIDS. I started taking drugs to control the formation of HIV in my body, there is nothing difficult about it.
I always tell the story of my life because many people are interested in how I got HIV. The answer is simple: I contracted HIV infection through sexual contact, 90% of people in the world are infected in this way. Many of these people are between 14 and 25 years old.
Although I contracted HIV through sexual contact, I did not lead a promiscuous lifestyle, did not take drugs or work in the sex industry. I was just a young girl looking for love. I was also vulnerable because I did not have access to reliable information about HIV. I became even more vulnerable because no one answered my questions or offered help when I faced one of the hardest problems of my life: sexual abuse. When I was 20 years old, I was the victim of sexual violence by two passers-by who attacked me at night when I was returning home. Sexual violence against young women and girls is directly linked to HIV infection. This situation is very common, but very few people have the courage to talk about it and speak out against it.
Gracia Violeta Ross is fighting for her life and is now one of the main human rights activists among people with HIV/AIDS in Bolivia. Photo by UNICEF. I never found out who the men who attacked me were, but all my life I have lived through the consequences of their attack. On the one hand, my self-esteem dropped, and I felt dirty and worthless. On the other hand, I felt guilty about what happened. Malnutrition has become one of my unconscious ways to punish my body for what happened. Four years later, I developed anorexia and bulimia.
This feeling of worthlessness led me to want to share my passion with someone, even if it would endanger my health. I had unprotected sexual relations with my boyfriend, we were not protected from pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. I constantly thought about the consequences of my behavior, but at that time I was only interested in sexual experience.
My lifestyle during that period seemed very busy, I was constantly drinking, dancing, every weekend I went to parties and felt like a rebel who rebelled against the will of my parents. However, I became absolutely unhappy when the results of the analysis were in my hands. At that moment, I felt that death was knocking at my door.
If you are young and believe that nothing can harm you, you are mistaken. If you believe that love will protect you from HIV, then again you are wrong. If it seems to you that it is possible to determine HIV status by external signs, then you are again mistaken. None of the above will protect you from HIV.
Looking for life
I have been living with HIV for eight years now. My life has changed dramatically. When I felt that death was destroying my life, I seized on it, and just recently began to live in a new way.
After suffering from severe illness, I realized how much love my family can give me. They didn't turn away or distance themselves from me, they didn't judge me. They just loved me.
I began to change my lifestyle, gave up those things that were harmful to my health, and began to look for ways to improve it. I would never have believed that I could live so many happy years being infected with HIV.
Very often, young people are looking for a person to whom they could belong, with whom they could experience wonderful moments, but at the same time we often forget about the dangers to which our health is exposed.
Young men and women are suffering from the HIV epidemic, but we also have the power to make a difference in the spread of AIDS. I have seen this from my own experience. At 23, I was diagnosed with HIV, but I did not give up, continued to study anthropology and received a master's degree. I kept hoping that one day in Bolivia the situation of people with HIV would change, and I fought for it. Together with other young people living with HIV, we organized Redball, an organization for people living with HIV/AIDS, in Bolivia.
Today, Redball is one of the most important organizations dealing with AIDS in Bolivia. Together with our partners, we developed a draft law and submitted it to the state for consideration. In addition, we are engaged in disease prevention by sharing our life experiences so that people can understand that everyone is at risk of contracting the virus. At the same time, we are fighting prejudice and discrimination based on HIV/AIDS. The most important aspect of our fight has been to ensure that people living with HIV have access to antiretroviral drugs, the care they need, and an adequate standard of living. Such changes do not happen overnight, but we have already noticed that the situation of people with HIV/AIDS has improved in many ways.
If you are young and not infected with the virus, make a promise to yourself that this will be the case for the rest of your life. If you are young and infected with HIV, there is still hope for such people. Young people have the opportunity to break the chain of HIV transmission.
Samara Department of Rospotrebnadzor, for ten months of 2015, 2963 HIV-infected people were registered in the region. About 1.2% of all residents of the region are living with HIV, which is 2.5 times higher than the national figure. In total, since the beginning of monitoring this infection in the Samara region (since 1989), more than 60,000 people have been infected with it, 18,000 of whom have already died. In 1998-2001, the main outbreak of HIV infection in the region occurred among injecting drug users. Today, according to the regional AIDS Center, more than half of new infections occur through sexual contact.
We listened to the stories of residents of Samara and Togliatti who have been living with HIV for more than ten years. All of them are between 30 and 35 years old, and all became infected in the most common way in the 2000s - through a needle. What do you feel when you are diagnosed, where to find the strength to start a new life, why it is important to take antiretroviral therapy (ARVT) and not to believe the tales that HIV and AIDS do not exist - in our material. As illustrations, we have selected frames from the most famous films about HIV and AIDS.
I began to think that in six months I would die in misery. And why then be sober, why live at all?
Alexey, Samara
Diagnosis
I found out about him on April 19, 2001. By that time, I had just quit drugs, had been sober for several months, planned to start a new life and passed all the tests. And this is where it becomes clear. The first reaction was panic, there was a feeling that they had lifted to a great height, and then - bam, and hit the ground. I began to think that in six months I would die in misery - why then be sober, why live at all? But I was lucky, I immediately got into a self-help group, where I told about my status, and people supported me, gave me the necessary information.
Reaction
There was an unpleasant situation with how my parents found out about my diagnosis. They received a letter with a recommendation to donate blood for HIV infection, because they are supposedly at risk because they are in contact with a carrier of the virus. They were told this without my knowledge. At that time, I already had the necessary knowledge and inner strength to tell my parents about what HIV infection is and why they should not be afraid. The rest of the relatives found out in a rather funny way. At the AIDS Center they gave me a piece of paper stating that I am responsible for not infecting other people, I took it and framed it at home. And I forgot. At a family celebration, my sister saw her, calls me and asks: “Lyosha, what is this?” Then my niece comes in, who at that time was finishing school and says: “Come on, mom, don’t worry, HIV is not transmitted in everyday life, you can live with it.” That is, in principle, she told everything for me, and I just nodded.
Therapy
I have been taking antiretroviral therapy since 2003. At first it was hard - I had to drink 24 tablets a day, stick to a diet. I then worked in an advertising agency, I had to constantly hide from colleagues, plus the burden on the body due to the large number of drugs. But over time, the schemes have changed, and now I drink four tablets a day. In my opinion, the medicines have become better, and in general the situation with treatment has become easier after the opening of the regional AIDS center. I go through all the necessary medical examinations there.
At the clinic, when I came to donate blood, they put me last in line
Discrimination
Shot from the movie "Philadelphia"
Most of the cases of discrimination were in hospitals. In 2007 I was hit by a car and had a knee injury. I turned to the clinics of the medical university, where they started harassing me and demanding to pass a bunch of tests, they said that there was no place, and then they even hinted that it would be nice to give money. At that time I was engaged in HIV activism, and I had connections in Moscow, through which I went out with a complaint to the federal Ministry of Health. I was given the phone number of the head physician of the clinics of the Samara State Medical University, we met in person, he looked at me and said that tomorrow I should go to their hospital. I had surgery and everything was fine. It also happened that in the clinic at the place of residence, when I came to donate blood, they put me last in line. It doesn't matter when you come: since you are HIV-positive, then go to the end of the line. There is no such thing in the new polyclinic that I go to now, they accept me on a general basis. We have a lot of different stigmas in our society. HIV infection still scares people because there is too little reliable and understandable information from authoritative sources. Vladimir Vladimirovich would say: “You can live with this!”, and everyone would calm down. But still, in recent years, according to my observations, society has become more tolerant towards people living with HIV.
AIDS dissidents
For a long time I led psychological groups on HIV acceptance, a large number of people passed through me. There was one person, an AIDS dissident, who went to my groups for six years and said: they say, there is no HIV infection, all this is fiction. He was in prison, and there are a lot of such myths going around: they say that people are being poisoned with the help of therapy. He had many such cockroaches in his head. He pulled to the last and did not take drugs, and recently he called me and said: “Alexey, I finally heard you, thank you. I have two friends who died, one from tuberculosis, the other from pneumonia due to HIV infection. And I decided to take therapy, and now I feel much better.” There were many such situations. Those who do start taking drugs will later admit how stupid they were not to do this before.
HIV infection does not choose you by gender, orientation, status - it doesn't care who you are, how much money you have, who you work with
Applies to everyone
Shot from the film "Children" There was such a slogan in 2005 or 2006, but then it was perceived as beautiful words. And now the slogan shows the real state of affairs: completely different people come to the AIDS center. HIV infection does not choose you by gender, orientation, status - it doesn't care who you are, how much money you have, who you work with. You can get infected if you practice risky behavior.
Life today
Now I work in a Samara rehabilitation center as a chemical addiction consultant. I have a family: a wife and three children, all healthy. At the time of my marriage, I had been taking therapy for seven years, thanks to which the viral load in the body had dropped to an undetectable level. That is, the drugs suppressed the HIV infection very well, and we conceived children naturally, without risk to the wife.
A cleaning lady came into the ward, dressed almost in a space suit, as if she had to clean up the lepers in the ward
Tatyana, Tolyatti
Diagnosis
I found out that I had HIV in 2001, when I was in narcology. There were a lot of patients there at that time - there was just a powerful wave of drug addiction. Then there were rumors that all drug addicts who got there were subjected to one analysis, because it was too expensive for everyone to do it separately. It was really strange that absolutely everyone was given a “plus”. When you know that you have HIV, you no longer care about safety, and I could use a shared syringe. So it is already impossible to understand exactly when and how I got infected. In addition, I did not know then that there are also hepatitis and HIV of different strains. Now I understand that if you find out your diagnosis, you need to immediately look for all the information about the disease and safety measures.
Shot from the film "Gia" I was waiting to die, and just burned my life in the end
Reaction
When I found out about the diagnosis, the first thing I did was to get into the shower and sit there all day under cold water in order to somehow recover. Then I thought: now you can walk and hang out without a twinge of conscience, but what else remains to be done? Then the doctors spoke in general terms, and I waited for me to die, and just burned my life in the end. I hung out, hung out, and suddenly realized that it’s not HIV that kills me at all, but the way of life that I lead.
Therapy
I brought a lot of people to the AIDS center, explaining that they need to get registered and start taking therapy. But if a person is stuck at the level of spending life and believes that the diagnosis serves as an excuse for him, then, of course, it is difficult to do something. I myself have been taking ART since 2006, and I take it very seriously. I do not believe that one can live with HIV without supporting the body with drugs. I had a friend, almost a member of the family. I somehow found out that he had tuberculosis on the background of HIV infection. He did not receive therapy. When he was anonymously tested for HIV in the hospital, the result came back negative. I asked my infectious disease specialist how this is even possible. It turned out that there are rare cases when everything in the body is already so bad that the analysis does not reveal antibodies to HIV, and the viral load itself is huge. Doctors write that the patient is HIV-negative, and he is happy to believe, although he dies from a concomitant infection of the disease. A friend ended up in the hospital, then in intensive care, where he died of tuberculosis.
Discrimination
I had to face discrimination in the hospital when I gave birth. Women in labor with HIV-positive status were in a separate room. It was funny when the cleaner came in, dressed almost in a space suit, as if she had to clean the leper ward. After some time, the internal routine changed, and all women in labor, regardless of their HIV status, were sent to general wards.
Many years have passed, and I realized that I can live a normal life, complete my education
Life today
At some point, I realized that you can still live, start a family, have children, which I did. Of course, I took precautions to keep the children healthy. But even after that, I had small tasks: to see how the children learn to walk, to read, because I still constantly waited for death. Many years have already passed, and I realized that I can live a normal life, complete my education. This understanding was due to the fact that people who did not take therapy began to die.
In the 2000s, an HIV diagnosis was perceived as "I'm going to die," and that's it.
Alexander, Tolyatti
About the diagnosis
I have HIV, hepatitis C, and in general I am not a tenant. - We can handle everything, I love you
Reaction
This lasted until a loved one appeared in my life. That was the first time I was faced with the need to be responsible and report my status. I remember riding the bus and I blurted out, as if in spirit: “I have HIV, hepatitis C, and in general I am not a tenant.” And in response I heard: “We can handle everything, I love you.” I was very lucky, but I’m probably a weak person - I didn’t quit drinking then, drugs too. He recovered after some time at the institute, then left again and left for St. Petersburg.
Shot from the film "House for Boys" Therapy
I lived, burning life, but then, of course, the limit came. I began to have serious health problems, thank God, I was back in Tolyatti then. I went to the AIDS center, where they told me that I needed to start drinking therapy urgently. After the reception, strength immediately increased, but this was not enough. I had to radically change my attitude to life, which I did by quitting drugs.
It doesn't matter if you use drugs or not, you still have a stigma
Discrimination
A couple of years ago I had pneumonia, I had to inject drugs in the buttock. Due to a shattered immune system, I developed a muscle abscess. I came to the hospital with severe pain and told me that I had HIV. And the doctors say: “Yes, you are a drug addict, you blew yourself a dose and now you are telling us fairy tales here.” And at that time I had already quit drugs for a couple of years. I think this reaction is connected with the fact that in the minds of people HIV is equated with drug addiction, and it doesn’t matter whether you use it or not, you still have a stigma attached to it.
About tolerance
In order for society to become more tolerant of HIV-infected people, I think they need to have the courage to say: I, such and such, live with an HIV diagnosis, and my life is normal, I have goals and aspirations, there is a desire to live. The more we talk about it, the less people will become afraid of what they now, in fact, know very little about.
Life today
For the past few years, I have been actively involved in HIV activism, working as a peer consultant, and going to trainings. I have a close person, many friends, a new job has recently appeared. Still, over time, you realize that HIV implies some limitation, with which, however, you can live quite normally.
Shot from the film "Dallas Buyers Club" Mom, when she found out, gave me a towel, a spoon, a fork, and so on, which hurt me very much
Anna, Samara
About the diagnosis
I have known about my HIV status since 2000. Then I took injecting drugs with might and main, and the question of treatment was not before me. I understood that this was from the category of “what they fought for - they ran into it,” and was a consequence of my then lifestyle. It was scary and incomprehensible until there was information. In 2006, I was hospitalized with pneumonia, the situation was critical. The doctor then told me: they say, you should start doing something, because you have HIV infection, and your health is in a deplorable state. This became one of the driving factors to stop using. I began to recover on a 12-step program and have been sober ever since. I received support from Narcotics Anonymous groups, where I saw people who really want something and strive for something.
Reaction
My mother knows about my status, my father has not yet been told, although I think he understands everything perfectly. Mom, when she found out, gave me a towel, a spoon, a fork, and so on, which hurt me very much. But then she got more information, and now she supports me in everything.
Therapy
In 2006, as soon as I "came to my senses", I registered with the AIDS Center. I realized that I need to strictly follow all the recommendations of doctors in order to improve the quality of life. I have been taking therapy since 2010. I have never had any problems with the AIDS center, I think, due to the fact that I go there regularly, I know doctors, and they see that I take good care of my health.
About specialized medicine
In the AIDS Center, doctors quite directively force you to undergo an examination once every six months. Thus, they can detect tuberculosis and concomitant diseases in time. In addition, now there is a control on the reception of therapy. Before you receive a new portion of the tablets, you must pass all the tests so that you can track the dynamics. There have been cases when people who did not want to register with the AIDS center bought ART from drug users who were receiving therapy but were not going to take it. That is, an addicted person comes to the AIDS center, receives medicines for three months, immediately sells them and goes to buy a new dose of drugs. And therapy costs a lot of money, and if a patient takes medication and does not take it, it costs the state a pretty penny.
Discrimination
In the AIDS Center I feel free, but after visiting polyclinics, I still sometimes get an unpleasant aftertaste. Recently I went to the antenatal clinic, I stood in line, I go into the office, and they tell me: “Come in after everyone else.” On the one hand, I understand that these are security measures, but on the other hand, I feel like I am a second-class person. I am pregnant, and in my position I perceive all this acutely. Now I am starting to think about the maternity hospital: what awaits me there, how I will have to communicate with doctors and reveal my status to them - and I am obliged to do this, because doctors work with my blood. What will be the attitude towards me there and how much will I need to pay to make this attitude loyal?
My life is no different from the life of a healthy person
AIDS dissidence
There are people who say that HIV is a fairy tale, a big lie. In fact, this is just a defensive reaction on their part, an unwillingness to accept reality. A lot of them were buried. Yes, therapy is a kind of restriction of freedom, pills need to be taken on time, it's all the same chemistry, the use of which cannot pass without a trace for the body. But there are more benefits. Already a month after the start of the intake, my viral load went below the detection threshold, and it never rose again.
About tolerance
Our society is not yet ready to accept people who are different in some way - be it nationality, diagnosis, or anything else. Although now the contingent of the AIDS center is noticeably changing. If earlier they were mostly drug users, now there are elderly women and decent-looking couples sitting there. Now the main factor in the spread of infection is unprotected sex, and everyone who does not follow the safety rules during sexual intercourse is at risk.
We specifically prepared to become parents and not pass the virus to our child
Life today
Since I found out my HIV status, I managed to get a psychological education, and now I work in a rehabilitation center in Samara. I recently got married and am expecting a baby. My husband is a drug addict in remission and is also HIV positive. Both of us have viral loads now below the detection limit. We specifically prepared to become parents and not pass the virus to our child. Thanks to therapy, I now feel like a healthy person. I also have a healthy immune system. I try to take better care of myself, rest more, catch colds less, but otherwise my life is no different from the life of an ordinary person.
In Samara, you can find out your HIV status at the regional AIDS center at: st. Novo-Sadovaya, 178A, from 8-00 to 19-00 daily, except Saturday and Sunday.
The city center for the prevention and control of AIDS in Togliatti is located at the address: Zdorovya Boulevard, 25, (Medgorodok) from the end of the oncological building on the 3rd floor, from 8-00 to 18.30, daily, except Saturday, Sunday and holidays.
The story I want to tell is not a Sabbath story, not an easy one, and not an easy one. But today I have to tell her. Because today, December 1st, is the day the world celebrates World AIDS Day.
This is the story of a young woman who lives in Tolyatti. Her name is Natalia Mitusova and she has HIV. We met her several years ago, when Natasha was still hiding her status. Today she lives with an open face. Few dare to do so. There are very few such people throughout the country. In our city, I don't know of any such cases.
Natasha is a very brave person. And very strong. At the same time, she is a charming young woman, sensitive, tender. Her story is, unfortunately, a typical "female" story of HIV infection in Tolyatti.
Natalya did not use drugs (through the injection of which, as is known, the first cases of infection appeared). She received HIV from a loved one whom she believed and who did not even think of asking for a certificate from an infectious disease specialist. By the time she found out about his HIV-positive status, they had been living together for a year and a half.
"
I found out about it by accident, - says Natasha. - We celebrated my birthday in nature. I turned 25. A group of friends gathered. I remember cutting a watermelon and hurting myself. But she continued to cut. Seeing this, a close friend of mine later asked in a tête-à-tête how I could be so nonchalant. It turned out that she knew about the status of my boyfriend, assumed that I was also infected. That's how everything opened up.
Misha and I did not part immediately. Of course, I had a strong resentment against him. For a long time I could not forgive him for not telling me about his status. Every time we had a fight, I blamed him for it. She said: “I would sue you if it were not for the shame that I would have to go through.” Now I understand that it would be wrong. He himself was scared. I was afraid to confess. Afraid that I'll leave him. Besides, this situation is also my fault. I shouldn't have had sexual relations with him without a certificate. After all, at that time I already knew that there was HIV in our city. She knew that Misha had used drugs in the past. So I could assume he has HIV. We had to go to the AIDS center together, get tested. With this, perhaps, a serious relationship should begin.
You know, then, some time later,
I saw a sign in the hospital. I remember her forever: "Love passes, but HIV remains." It's just about me."
Having learned about the HIV-positive status of her beloved man, Natasha nevertheless did not go to the hospital. I decided it was better not to know, it would be easier. For some time she lived, running away from reality, until it happened that she was forced to undergo a simple, in general, operation. In the hospital, without her knowledge, they took blood for HIV from her. And after a while, she received a call from the AIDS Center and was invited to come to them, at 25 Zdorovya Boulevard. A second analysis confirmed the presence of the virus.
"
The first thing I did was go to a bookstore and find an AIDS dissident book (AIDS dissidents are people who deny the existence of the immunodeficiency virus - Auth.). I remember that it was fat, it had a lot and beautifully written about all sorts of scientific papers and scientists who claimed that HIV was an invention of pharmaceutical companies.
I read this book, but did not stop crying. Periodically went out to the balcony - we lived on the 15th floor - looked down and thought about how nice it would be to fly away. My head was full of mess. On the one hand - the "facts" from the AIDS dissident book. On the other hand, an HIV-positive analysis and a conversation with an infectious disease specialist. He then told me: “Don’t worry, you will live at least 15 years.” I calculated that my son Ilyusha would be a little over 20 by that time. I was sad at this thought. But I thought I should raise him."
It took about 3 years before Natasha was able to accept her diagnosis. When asked how this happened, she gives a sadly funny answer:
"
The company where I worked had internet. The first thing I asked the network was: "Can you get HIV through oral sex?" All the information that I found, I read avidly. After all, before that, I had not come across a single book, except for the AIDS dissident book. Through various links, I began to go to various forums. I saw that in many cities there are self-help groups of people living with HIV. Around the same time, I found a stack of business cards from the Togliatti support group in the AIDS center. I even took one. This business card has been in my bag for probably a year. I took it out, put it back - did not dare to call. But somehow on the weekend she did it, she came to the group. And I was delighted. I saw beautiful, smart, smiling people who are not going to die at all, who talk about what all "normal" people talk about. So I started going there all the time."
At some point, it happened that there was no one to lead the support group. Natasha was one of those who picked up this baton. Simply because I understood how important it was, because I remembered myself the old, frightened, lost. At that time, she did not yet imagine that helping other HIV-infected people would become the most important occupation in her life.
The further, the more she participated in various actions. Along with a support group, she began to run a helpline for HIV-infected people. And she was ready to live with an open face. Only the son was not yet ready for this.
Ilya was 13 years old when Natasha told him about her status.
"
By this time, the question arose for me that I needed to talk with my son about sex, says Natasha. - I interviewed all the men I knew, I asked everyone when he began to live a sexual life. They answered me: at 12, 13, 14 years old. And I realized that it was time to tell about myself. Before that, I told him about HIV, but he didn’t really listen to me. As do most people who believe that this will not affect them. Just like I used to...
I told Ilya about HIV by my own example. Surprisingly, he took it calmly, without hysteria. Ilya... he was very courageous. Strong. The only thing was when I handed him the condoms, he asked: “What is this for? I'm still a virgin." To which I replied: “Let them always lie in a briefcase.” Then periodically she laid them herself. And now, when his friends come to visit, I also always give them condoms with me."
Ilya quite easily accepted the status of a mother, but he was not ready to agree that she would reveal it to everyone. He understood that this would make life difficult for him, especially at school. Therefore, Natasha decided to postpone this.
"
A year and a half ago, the opportunity came up to take him with me to Bryansk, to a training for HIV-infected activists. I thought that when he sees how many of us, what wonderful people we are, he might change his mind. At that moment, I thought that we were going with him so that he would allow me to open my status. As a result, it happened ... "
On the way to Bryansk, the car with Natasha, Ilya and another person had an accident. Only Natasha survived. She learned about the death of Ilya 40 days after he left. All this time, his death was hidden from her. Doctors were afraid that otherwise she would not get out. After the accident, Natasha was in a coma, then in intensive care. Her condition remained very serious, so she was able to be transported to Tolyatti when more than a month had passed after the accident.
"
It's only recently that I've begun to accept that he's gone. And talk about it without tears. For a long time I had the feeling that I was under some kind of glass cap. I walk down the street, but I don’t see anyone, I don’t hear anything. I didn't care. Let the car run over me. I was not afraid of death. And I didn't want to live. It was only recently that I regained my will to live."
After the death of Ilya, Natasha's beloved person, with whom they were going to sign, did not stop repeating: "You see what your activism has led to!" Natasha left him.
"
When Ilya died in a car accident, people from all over the world helped my mother. They raised money for the funeral, to bring us both to Tolyatti, to rehabilitate me. 300 thousand rubles were sent from different parts of the world. I realized that I could not and did not want to quit what I was doing. When Ilya was alive, when asked why I was doing this, I answered: "For the sake of HIV not touching my son." Now I am doing this so that HIV does not touch his friends, girls and boys, who think that bad things happen to anyone, but not to them.
“I am grateful to life that I have HIV,” Natasha says at the same time. This is shocking. It seems that this is impossible to understand. She explains:
"
After I learned about my diagnosis and accepted it, I had a different attitude towards life. I started living each day like it was my last. I began to think: I have a little time left to live, but I have not yet been to the sea, I have not seen Moscow. I stopped saving money for a kitchen set or for repairs in an apartment. Instead, we took our son somewhere every vacation. I'm glad he got to see a lot.
Now I already know that, thanks to antiretroviral therapy, I will live for a long time. As long as people live without HIV. But during the time when I thought I was going to die soon, I learned to appreciate every day."
***
Natasha says that she is ready to tell her story as often as necessary. She gladly responds to invitations to TV and radio broadcasts, to round tables devoted to the topic of HIV, to conversations with teenagers. "I want people to know as much as possible about HIV," she explains. "Today, many people still think, 'I'm not a drug addict, so I can't have HIV'. Things have changed a long time ago. HIV can affect anyone."
Unfortunately it's true. In Tolyatti, the sexual route of transmission of the infection took the 1st place. In 2011, 53% were infected this way. At the dawn of the spread of HIV in our city, there were only 3% of them. The remaining 97% were drug addicts.
At the same time, the sexual route of transmission of the infection is most common among women: 70% become infected precisely from their sexual partners. And these are not prostitutes at all, as someone might think. Very often these are good, wonderful girls who go to bed for love and do not use a condom for love. Doctors also talk about cases when women became infected with HIV from their legal husbands.
I am not writing this to scare you. Although no, perhaps just to scare, alert. Every month, 70-110 new HIV-infected people are detected in Togliatti. 11% of all men in Togliatti aged 30-34 have HIV infection.
You need to remember this when engaging in sexual relations. Remember, no matter how much passion overwhelms you. So that the story: "Love passes, but HIV remains" - was not about you.
You can ask Natalya Mitusova any questions on the topic of HIV by calling the helpline: 8-902339-01-59 , (or urban) 49-01-59 .
You can donate blood for HIV free of charge and anonymously daily from 8.00 to 14.00 at the AIDS Center (Medgorodok, Zdorovya boulevard, 25, oncological building (building 11).
P.S. The post uses photographs from the personal archive of Natalya Mitusova.
More than 500 thousand people suffering from acquired immunodeficiency syndrome are now registered in the country. You probably don't want to join them.
Let's talk about HIV. You may already know the facts that will be discussed, but it will be useful to repeat and comprehend them again in any case.
HIV infection and AIDS
HIV is an infection that deprives the body of the ability to resist diseases, making it defenseless.
The first stage of HIV is the “window period”. The virus is in the blood, but it is not yet possible to establish its presence in the laboratory. A person remains in ignorance for 3-6 months.
This is followed by an asymptomatic course of the disease. It is possible to make a diagnosis, but there are no signs of infection. They may not be from 3 to 12 years.
And only then comes what can be called acquired immunodeficiency syndrome, AIDS. This is already a complex of diseases. There can be a prolonged temperature, a noticeable weight loss, toxoplasmosis, tuberculosis and other terrible diseases are easily acquired and rapidly develop.
Gradually, all the most vulnerable organs are affected. The result is death.
How many years does an infected person live?
Everything is individual, everyone has their own immunity. There is a woman in Russia who was infected 20 years ago and has not died so far. On average, people diagnosed with HIV live 12-15 years.
It is possible to extend the asymptomatic stage. The luminaries of medicine are sure that it is theoretically possible to increase the life span of an HIV-infected person to normal through therapy. But even scientists of the most daring mind cannot confidently speak about the chances of getting rid of the virus.
There is no one in the whole world who has been cured of HIV. Neither expensive foreign medicines, nor mumiyo, nor psychics help.
Methods of infection - truth and myths
Homosexuals are known to have been the first to become infected. But these were isolated cases. The disease took on a significant scale when, in 2000-2001, a boom in the spread of HIV among drug addicts, who transmitted the virus through blood on syringes, had to be recorded.
Infection with HIV through a syringe is still the predominant option.
However, in the last five years there has been a worrying trend - more and more people catch the virus through sexual contact. The majority of patients are women. For physiological reasons, women are ten times more likely to get AIDS through sex.
Myths about AIDS are typified by mosquitoes that supposedly carry the infection, about the cough-borne immunodeficiency virus.
The most persistent myth is that the infection enters the body by touching and kissing. The virus is found in high concentrations only in certain body fluids: blood, semen, vaginal secretions, and breast milk. There is very little of it in saliva.
You need to drink four liters of saliva of an HIV-infected person with a kiss in order to get sick. Of course, this is absurd.
The virus does not live long in the air.
But in a drop of liquid it is more stable. Liquid is his medium, as long as it is intact, it is dangerous.
How not to get infected: rules for the prevention of AIDS
The risk of infection can be reduced by maintaining a healthy lifestyle and observing basic rules of personal hygiene. You need to wash your hands often, in no case should you use someone else's razor or toothbrush.
It is also important to ensure that doctors use disposable instruments in the hospital.
Reliable prevention of HIV infection through sexual contact is possible only due to fidelity to one HIV-negative partner. Contrary to popular belief, condoms are not ideal protection.
Is a completely random infection possible?
I would like to complete the article “How not to get HIV?” cheerfully and optimistically, but ... Alas, you can catch HIV each of us. Including - completely unexpected.
Here are two real stories about how people happened to get HIV by accident.
The first story happened to a fifth-year student, a smart girl and a beauty. The girl from school was friends with the boy. In the 3rd year, the boy invited her to have sex.
She asked him to wait until graduation, she was afraid that she would become pregnant and not have time to calmly finish her studies, and she simply felt unprepared. The friend took the rejection as a personal insult. With grief, he began to secretly use drugs, seek casual sex. The girl did not know about the adventures of a friend. At the end of the fifth year, I decided to create a family with him. Got pregnant. I wanted to check. HIV.
Another incident also happened to a student. At a youth party, she was poured something alcoholic - she drank, maybe for the first and only time in her life.
I felt dizzy, felt bad, turned off.
The next morning I woke up and found that there was a trace of an unknown injection on my arm in the fold. Then the girl forgot about the ill-fated evening. She just gave up drinking.
One day she got married. Both she and her husband were her first partners. When the happy couple decided to have a baby, both were found to have HIV... A single injection and two destinies are crossed out.
Why does a person become infected with HIV? Because he either does not appreciate his unique life, or because someone else has neglected his fate.
Let's take care of our health and the lives of those around us!
Attention! This is an article from an old site that was not written by me. Read the new blog posts - they are, without false modesty, much more useful and deeper!
plus
facebook.com
Knows about their HIV-positive status 12 years
It was 2003, October, I was registered in the antenatal clinic for. Ten or something, it was weeks. And a year before that I did a tattoo. I passed the tests, and three days later I was called to a consultation to report that I had a positive reaction to HIV. That's how I found out. Until now - one of the most common ways to find out.
I suffocated. Went out to the porch. She lit up. Reminds me of the "if only" joke. Mom came over. I realized that I could not finish the word and started crying. Mom accepted.
The child's father asked for an abortion. A couple of old acquaintances started online bullying for a week, some of the people disappeared. Subsequently, they asked to get out of a couple of jobs. I do not regret.
Until this year, there was no need for special treatment, now the time has come. I'm about to start therapy. I hope there will be no problems with tablets, buying them on my own is quite problematic for me. Why am I talking about this? Because more than once I heard stories from acquaintances about interruptions in drugs. There is even a special website where patients from all over the country send complaints that they have run out of medicines in the city - Pereboi.ru. His data is disappointing.
How my life has changed... You know - for the better: minus extra people, plus - awareness and joy of life.
So far, my condition is no different from that of a healthy person. But still, living with HIV in Russia is a little harder than it is for an ordinary person. Although recently the tolerance of the society has grown somewhat, it is noticeable. Because of the growing number of HIV-positive people, I think, including.
Alexander Ezdakov, Kungur
facebook.com
Lived with HIV for 11 years, knew his status for 8 of them
I was tortured by recurrent. A very unpleasant thing, and now it is not treated and is not treated. At last the doctor has suggested to hand over on a HIV. And so I found out. I then realized what happened and when, I even wanted to find that woman to warn that she had HIV, but I didn’t find it anymore ...
But then I said to myself, “Stop! So you can sleep."
I didn’t have a family at that time, I told my sister much later, but after I got sick, she already reacted sluggishly to HIV. But they forced me to quit my job. While fishing, I told a colleague about the diagnosis - I explained why I need to constantly ask the doctor for time off. Well, over time, I was squeezed out of the business.
Is it difficult to live in Russia with HIV? I think yes. And it's not about the disease, but about the attitude of society and most government agencies towards you.
Here is a man working. And he needs to donate blood every three to six months. It just sounds simple.
And then you have to go to, who will give a blood coupon, but not for this day. It happens that there are no coupons, the doctor will only give you a referral, and you come back for a coupon again. Then, for the third time (and this is the third time you take time off from work), you go for an analysis. You can arrive at seven in the morning - and not be in time. Because there are a lot of people, and blood sampling ends at noon. You come again. A week later - for the result. And you have to say something all the time at work. So, for example, the work was set in Saratov, where I lived this summer.
Living with HIV is a parallel world that few people know about.
In a general clinic, you have to dodge so that the doctors do not find out your status, because they cannot keep their mouths shut “among their own”. And the whole clinic will know first, and then half the city. Litigation for disclosure? This is clear. But it will be too late.
I have been receiving therapy since 2010. There are no side effects, but in the first six months I changed three schemes. Side effects are a highly inflated topic, they will not happen if the drugs are carefully selected together with the doctor.
Maria Godlevskaya, St. Petersburg
Living with HIV for 16 years
facebook.com
I passed the general tests for admission to the hospital. After that, I was sent to the infectious diseases, to Botkin, they again took some tests, and there they gave answers a week later - through the window, without emotions, criticism, and generally any facial expressions on my face. I didn't watch them. And already in the office of the doctor who was supposed to put me in for an examination, I heard: “So why didn’t you say that you have HIV?” So I found out ... Mom, who was in the office with me, slid down the wall. I was 16 years old.
There were already people with HIV in my environment, and I saw that nothing had changed in their lives, so I was more afraid for my mother ... I saw her panic, and I understood that this was the end for my mother, or something like "daughter will die soon."
I myself, apparently due to my age and the absence of stereotypes, did not react in any way. Rather, I didn't care. I didn't think about death at all. In the late 1990s there were a lot of drugs and there were no harm reduction programs.
Therefore, there was already a lot of HIV in the city, and I am sure that it would have been even more if it were not for the Humanitarian Action bus (the oldest organization in St. Petersburg that works with drug users and exchanges syringes).
I practically forgot about HIV for four years. Only later, when the guy who asked me to marry him ran away, having heard about HIV, the thought crept in that something was wrong with me. Brother, having learned, said: “Well, damn it, you fool,” and that’s all, I didn’t hear anything bad from him anymore and didn’t feel neglect. Dad said: "You should pour it in, but it's too late." In general, my mother, having received exhaustive answers to her questions at the AIDS center, also did not panic anymore ...
I'm lucky with my loved ones. It is a rarity.
When I now have to counsel people with HIV, I hear different stories, and more often they are about a separate plate given out, pressure from relatives, dismissals from work (of course, under a different pretext).
Treatment... Problems with it are very different. I now work in the field of helping HIV-positive people and recently visited one of the cities in Siberia. There is a very small list of purchased drugs. And many of those that are in St. Petersburg are simply not available to patients in this town. Or, let's say, in another city in the AIDS center there are only three infectious disease specialists, and that's it. That is, I was also very lucky with the city, this is not flattery, but reality. Our AIDS center has all the specialists, including a cardiologist... This is rare... But the shortage of medicines has affected all cities. In the same city in Siberia, an annual supply of one of the drugs in demand was consumed in six months, and people are now being transferred to other regimens, which does not have a very good effect on both adherence to treatment and its quality.
Compared to the early 2000s, a lot has changed. There are drugs, not always and not all that are needed, but there are. But it is sad to live with any disease in Russia... Much depends on the patient himself.
We have it like: knocked out the right - got the drug. He said nothing - he went home to die ...
Evgeny Pisemsky, Orel
Living with HIV for 15 years
facebook.com
I took tests at the clinic. When the results came, the doctor said that “something was wrong” with me and sent me to the infectious diseases hospital. At that time I had no idea that this was an AIDS center. About two months later, out of curiosity, I decided to go and find out what was “wrong”. In the queue, I saw a lot of people who clearly used drugs. In the smoking room, one guy completely stunned me: “Estimate, I have AIDS.” I did not stick until the last moment. I went into the office, where the doctor wrote something for a very long time. I could not stand it and asked: “What is wrong with my analyzes?” After that, I remember some kind of fog and thoughts that I will not have children. Through the fog, I heard from the doctor: "Can I let you go?"
I lived in a fog and oblivion for two years, imagining where and how soon I would die, and what kind of music would be at the funeral.
Once I found out that there is such a self-help group for HIV-positive people, it became interesting: how do others live with this misfortune. I was going for almost six months and still came. First impression: very strange people. They plan their lives and are generally very cheerful. I must say that at that time there was no widely available treatment in Russia, and I did not know about it before I joined the group. After the group, life changed 180 degrees, I learned to live with HIV and learned to be a happy person.
In parallel, I became a helpline volunteer, and later I began to work in a magazine for people living with HIV. In essence, the "AIDS crisis" forced me to reset, rethink or understand my values and priorities in life. It's amazing, but thanks to the diagnosis, I became a happy person and continue to be so after 15 years. Yes, and I plan my old age. I'm not sure that my peers do this, for example, they think about a future pension, making some kind of investment in the future.
I have learned to live with HIV and know what needs to be done to stay healthy despite being chronically ill. But in Russia there is no prevention at all. The government is doing almost nothing to stop the epidemic in the country. And if it does, it is based not on reality, but on its own idea of traditional values.
HIV does not know what morals and traditions are. Please do not forget that only you yourself can stop the epidemic simply by taking care of your health, realizing that there are almost a million cases in the country.
As of November 1, 2015, 986,657 people with HIV were registered in Russia. According to Rospotrebnadzor, about 54% of patients become infected through intravenous drug use, and about 42% through heterosexual sexual intercourse.
In Russia, about 1% of people are living with HIV, 30% do not know about it. About 40% of detected patients are women of reproductive age. Despite being a carrier, they can have healthy children.
