Is it possible to wash the deceased with blood relatives. Required documents for funeral

Death is perhaps one of the most mysterious and frightening phenomena. It will inevitably affect every person. Even those who are skeptical about ghosts and other unknown things believe in it. Therefore, seeing off a person to another world has long been overgrown with a mass of beliefs and signs. Many of them are explained quite simply - a tribute to a person who has ended his life. The origin of others is mysterious and incomprehensible and is rooted in ancient, already forgotten traditions.

Signs at the funeral. What Not to Do

In the house where the deceased is located, it is supposed to hang all the mirrors. Otherwise, the soul will get lost in them, and the reflection of the deceased will appear alive, frightening them.
You can not stay overnight in the room where the coffin is located. If someone had to do this, in the morning such a person must be fed noodles.
Animals are not allowed in the house with the deceased. A dog can howl, which will frighten the soul of the deceased, and a cat can jump into the coffin, which is a bad omen.
It is impossible to sweep and take out garbage from the dwelling with the deceased - to the death of everyone living in the house. All this is done after the removal of the body.
Coins are placed on the eyes of the deceased - it is believed that if the dead man opens his eyes, he will certainly look out for the one who will soon leave after him.
You can’t put anything someone else’s in the coffin, and you can’t take anything that is already there back.
You can not photograph the deceased and shoot on video.
The coffin is not made to size - another dead man will appear in the house.

Meet the funeral - a sign, interpreted differently. Some say that this portends misfortune, others, on the contrary, consider the funeral procession a sign of happiness in the future, but this day does not bode well. As a sign of respect for the deceased, it is forbidden to cross the street in front of the procession (to the growth on the bones or unfortunately) and go towards. You have to stop and wait. Men should take off their hats. It is also forbidden to overtake the procession by car.

Funeral of a child: signs

The greatest tragedy is when a child dies. Some signs are also associated with the funeral of prematurely departed children:

going to the funeral of a baby, you should buy a toy and sweets or a wreath with a toy;
if the child has not been baptized, it is better to bury him at night, otherwise you can get sick. There is a belief that unbaptized children turn into evil spirits.

Notes related to memorials

It is forbidden to clink glasses at the commemoration - it is believed that this will transfer trouble from one house to another.
You can’t give tables and chairs to the wake - you can invite a funeral to your house.
Returning from the funeral, you need to warm your hands over the stove or a lit candle - it is believed that this will not allow death to be brought into the house.
After the grave is buried, one should drink for the repose of the soul of the deceased.
Returning to the house from where the deceased was taken out, it is necessary to put a glass of water by the window - the soul will drink from it for 40 days.
It is impossible to laugh and sing at the wake - grief will come to the house. You can’t get drunk - children will become alcoholics.

Signs related to the funeral for pregnant women

Many are interested in the question: is it possible for pregnant women to go to the cemetery?

Also available for pregnant women bad omens at a funeral. If possible, it is best to avoid such activities during pregnancy altogether. It is believed that the child may be born sick or dead.

If a woman came to a funeral, she should leave the house before the coffin with the deceased is carried out. It is forbidden to attend the funeral and burial.

It is not allowed to look at the deceased - it is believed that he can take the unborn child with him.

Funeral signs - superstitions, traditions, rituals

The funeral of a person is a rite of burial of the deceased, symbolizing farewell and the end of earthly life and the beginning of a new, eternal one. The entire funeral ritual among the Slavs has both Christian and pagan roots, closely intertwined and no longer separable due to centuries-old foundations.

Orthodox funerals in Russia, perhaps, most fully combined pre-Christian burial traditions and religious rules and burial procedures, traditions after the funeral.

This is due to the relative tolerance of Orthodoxy towards pagan survivals, the presence of many social and historical features in various parts of the country.

Tradition, burial of the deceased in every culture and religion is accompanied by a certain ceremony and rituals. The mysterious and mystical transition from the realm of the living to the realm of the dead is beyond the scope of human understanding, so people, depending on the religious worldview, historical and cultural features, have developed a whole system of rules and traditions for funerals. They should help the deceased to get used to the new world - after all, the vast majority of religions and beliefs proceed from the fact that death means only the end of the earthly period of existence.

The ritual ceremony is performed primarily to help the deceased, although at present many mistakenly consider the observed customs of burial and commemoration as a desire to support loved ones and relatives, share the bitterness of loss with them, and show a sense of respect for the deceased.

Stages of the funeral, Orthodox funeral traditions in Russia include the following main events and rituals, which together represent a sequential burial procedure;

Preparation;
wires;
funeral service;
burial;
remembrance.

Everyone has to bury loved ones. It is important to observe the funeral ritual. Russian Orthodox traditions have long been established (including those not currently used or used in remote areas by the Orthodox). There is a mandatory minimum that a person involved in the burial procedure needs to know.

An Orthodox person should know the minimum necessary for the proper construction of a funeral.

Such information is especially important for believers. Many people come to God in adulthood and do not know some of the customs, attaching importance to superstitions that are not related to religion and, thereby, not helping the soul of the deceased to enter the afterlife. For non-believers, the observance of traditions is important out of a sense of respect for the deceased and those who gathered to see him off.

Preparation for burial

Preparation is the pre-burial stage of the funeral, which includes several component ritual events. When preparing the body for burial, some pagan customs are also observed. Death in Christianity is considered as the beginning of the road to a new life, so the deceased must be prepared and collected for the road. The preparation of the body of the deceased for the unearthly path has both a religious and mystical content, and a sanitary and hygienic component.

body washing

The deceased must appear before the Creator clean both spiritually and bodily.

The mystical component of the rite is that the body was to be washed by certain people - the washers.

They could not be closely related to the deceased, so that tears would not fall on the body. Mourning for the deceased is not compatible with the Christian understanding of death as a transition to eternal life and a meeting with God. There is a belief that a mother's tear burns a dead child. The washers were chosen from among the old virgins and widows who are clean and do not commit bodily sins. For work, linen and clothes of the deceased were relied upon as a reward.

The body was washed on the floor at the threshold of the house, the deceased was located with his feet to the stove. Warm water, comb and soap were used. It was believed that otherworldly dead forces pass to the things used when washing, so it was necessary to get rid of them as soon as possible. Pots containing water for washing, combs, soap residues were thrown into the ravine, carried out to the crossroads, beyond the field. The used water was considered dead and poured out in the far corner of the yard, where people did not go and nothing landed.

All these traditions are a reflection of the mystical component of the pagan understanding of death and fear of the other world.

Compliance with such rituals was necessary so that the dead would not come from the other world and take their loved ones with them. The Christian meaning lies in the need to purify before God not only spiritual, but also bodily. Modern washing in the morgue has a purely sanitary and hygienic content.

Deceased's vestments

Now it is traditional to dress the deceased man in a dark suit and white shirt, women in light colors. However, in the era of Ancient Rus' and the Middle Ages, everyone was buried in white. This tradition combined both Christian ideas about the purity of the soul and the traditional white robes adopted in Rus'.

Traditionally, the deceased is dressed in white.

The best clothes of the deceased are chosen for burial, special funeral sets or new suits and dresses are often purchased, which also symbolizes the purity of a person before God. Feet are shod in white slippers without hard soles - a familiar symbol of funeral accessories. It is forbidden to use clothes of relatives or other people. The head of women is covered with a scarf, which is combined with Christian and cultural traditions, a wreath is put on a man with a prayer.

Separate traditions are observed in relation to deceased young girls and boys who did not have time to marry.

The death of a young person is always an exceptional event. Premature death at the most active age causes particular regret and sadness. Unmarried girls, both in the old days and now, are buried in white, and often in wedding dresses, and put a veil in the coffin. The funeral of the bride may be accompanied by some wedding customs - drinking champagne, singing wedding songs.

For dead young people who did not have time to marry, wedding rings are put on the ring finger of the right hand. The dressing of young people takes place in the same way as in preparation for the wedding ceremony. Similar traditions exist not only in the Orthodox world.

Position in the coffin

After washing and dressing, the deceased is placed on a bench facing the icons, spreading straw or something soft. Silence must be observed in the house, telephones, audio-video equipment must be turned off. Mirrors, glass surfaces other than windows (cabinet and sideboard doors, interior doors, etc.) must be covered with white paper or cloth, photographs and paintings removed or hung.

The coffin (the obsolete name domina - from the word "house") is considered as the last earthly refuge of a person. This element is given much attention in the funeral procedure.

In ancient times, coffins could be made whole from a tree trunk. In its usual form, this ritual object is made of boards, modern materials (chipboard, plastic, etc.), metals can only be used for decoration and decoration (zinc coffins are an exception in certain cases). For the manufacture of any type of wood except aspen can be used. Inside the coffin is lined with soft material. Expensive coffins can be polished, trimmed with valuable materials and upholstered in a soft finish. The body is placed on a white cover - a sheet or cloth. A small pillow is placed under the head. A prepared coffin can be regarded as an imitation of a bed, the deceased is laid down in such a way that it is “comfortable”. Sometimes women during their lifetime prepare a pillow for themselves in the coffin, stuffed with their own hair.

The coffin in the Christian tradition is an imitation of a bed

The baptized are buried with a pectoral cross. An icon is placed in the coffin, a chaplet on the forehead and “manuscript” - a written or printed prayer that absolves sins. It is put into the right hand of the deceased, A candle is placed on the chest in crossed arms. The deceased can put things that he constantly used or especially valued during his lifetime. It has become common to be buried with cell phones.

Previously, mittens were worn to transfer the body to the coffin, the house was constantly fumigated with incense. Until the removal of the coffin, you can not throw garbage out of the house - this custom is observed in our time.

Seeing the deceased

Seeing off the deceased is also a symbiosis of Orthodox rites, mystical beliefs and traditions and takes place in several stages. Currently, modern traditions are closely intertwined with established old customs, which include:

the establishment of a portrait and awards of the deceased at the coffin, their demonstration in the funeral procession;
farewell speeches;
placement of photographs on grave monuments and crosses;
funeral music, singing, fireworks;
condolences through the media, etc.

Farewell to the deceased

The coffin is placed in the room on a table covered with cloth, or on stools with their feet towards the door. The cover is located vertically with a narrow part to the floor in the corridor, often on the landing. For 3 days, the coffin with the body of the deceased must remain in the house.

Relatives, friends, acquaintances and neighbors come to visit the deceased. The doors don't close. At night, relatives and friends should gather around the coffin - to say goodbye to the deceased, to remember his worldly life, the events in which the deceased was a participant.

Previously, relatives or specially invited persons (not necessarily priests) read the psalter over the coffin without fail. Now the observance of this tradition is at the discretion of the next of kin. Above the deceased one should read the canon “Following the Exodus of the Soul from the Body”.

If there are images in the house, it is necessary to put a glass of water in front of them, covered with a piece of bread. Water and bread can be placed on the windowsill. It is believed that the soul of the deceased does not immediately leave the earth. The food and drink on display can reflect both pagan sacrifice to the spirit of the deceased, and Christian ideas about the stay of the soul on earth after death for 40 days - a vivid example of the interweaving of pagan and Christian rites. At the head of the coffin, on a table or other elevation, a candle is lit, and a lamp should be lit in front of the images. Candles can be installed in the corners of the domino.

A portrait with a black ribbon is set at the head of the coffin, awards are placed on a pillow at the feet. Wreaths are lined up along the walls of the room, a wreath from relatives is placed at the feet between the coffin and the pillow with awards. People who come to say goodbye usually do not take off their shoes. It is required to stand or sit near the coffin for a while, for a long time or during the night only relatives gather at the deceased. Chairs or benches should be placed along the coffin in the room with the deceased. Farewell is carried out until the removal of the body.

At present, the tradition of a three-day farewell is not observed in megacities and large cities, but in small towns and rural areas it has been preserved everywhere.

Compliance with the three-day farewell is at the discretion of the relatives and depends on the actual circumstances in which the burial takes place.

Often the body for burial is taken from the mortuary already prepared, the procession immediately goes to the church or to the cemetery. The clergy do not insist on the exact observance of all this does not affect.

Removal of the body and funeral procession

The removal of the body is appointed no earlier than 12 - 13 hours and with the expectation that the burial occurs before sunset. Usually they try to carry out the removal before 14 - 00. They take out the deceased with their feet forward, without touching the threshold and door jambs, which should protect against the return of the dead. There is another special protective rite - replacing the place of the deceased. It is necessary to sit for some time on the table or stools on which the coffin was located, and then turn them upside down for a day.

Removal of the body begins at 12 - 13 hours

Before the removal, those who came to say goodbye and see off on their last journey line up along the route of the procession. Initially, wreaths, a portrait of the deceased, a pillow with orders and medals, and a coffin lid are taken out of the house. After 10-15 minutes, they take out the coffin and carry it to the hearse, relatives go out behind the coffin. In front of the hearse, the coffin is placed on stools for several minutes and left open to give the opportunity to say goodbye to those people who have not been at home and are not going to the funeral service and the cemetery.

In a hearse, the coffin is placed on a special pedestal with the head forward, wreaths are laid.

A specific custom during the removal is the mourning of the deceased, and more often non-relatives or close people mourn. Lamentations over the coffin and tears, according to tradition, should characterize the personality of the deceased. The better the relationship with others and respect from society, the more crying. In the old days, there were special mourners who were specially invited to the ceremony. Folklore has also preserved funeral lamentations - songs-lamentations that were sung in a hoarse howling voice.

The funeral procession from the door of the house to the hearse is built in the following order:

orchestra;
master of ceremonies;
a man carrying a portrait;
people carrying pillows with awards of the deceased;
people with wreaths;
people carrying a coffin lid;
carrying the coffin;
close relatives;
others who say goodbye.

There was an interesting ritual of the first meeting, personifying the unity of earthly and unearthly life. The rite consisted in the fact that the first person met by the procession was given bread, which he wrapped in a towel. The gifted had to pray for the repose of the soul of the deceased. It was assumed that the deceased should be the first to meet in the other world the person who was presented with bread. Along the way, the procession with the coffin scattered grain for the birds. The presence of birds was considered a good sign, sometimes they were identified with the souls of the dead.

The funeral procession, according to church canons, could only stop in the church and near the cemetery. Often, traffic slowed down or stopped when passing some places and objects memorable for the deceased or significant: near the house of a recently deceased neighbor or relative, at crossroads, at crosses, etc. As they passed through such places, some of the mourners could be weeded out.

This custom is to some extent combined with the traditions associated with the 40-day stay of the soul of the deceased on earth. During this period, the soul visits the most significant places for a person in earthly life.

The coffin is not allowed to be carried by the next of kin. Most often, porters are either specially invited people, or friends, colleagues and distant relatives. The ceremony of carrying the coffin is very different from the one that existed before. What remains in common is that the farther the coffin is carried on the hands, the more respected position the deceased occupied. On the way to the coffin, fresh flowers are scattered - carnations for the deceased man and roses for women and girls.

funeral service

The deceased is buried on the 3rd day after death, except for the days of Holy Pascha and the Nativity of Christ. The ceremony is performed only once, in contrast to memorial services, which can be served both before burial and repeatedly after. Only baptized people are allowed to perform the funeral service. Those who have renounced the faith or excommunicated from the church, suicides, cannot be reprimanded. In absolutely exceptional cases, the latter can be buried with the blessing of the bishop.

Suicides are not buried in church

To perform the ceremony, the coffin with the deceased is brought into the church and placed with his head to the altar. Those gathered are nearby, holding burning church candles in their hands. The priest proclaims the Eternal Memory and reads a prayer of permissiveness, with which the unfulfilled oaths lying on the deceased and the sins committed by him during his lifetime are released. Permissive prayer does not forgive sins that the deceased did not consciously want to repent of, only those recognized at confession or about which the deceased did not report due to ignorance or forgetfulness can be forgiven.

A leaflet with the words of a prayer is put into the hands of the deceased.

At the end of the prayer, those gathered put out the candles and walk around the coffin, kiss the chaplet on the forehead and the icon on the chest, and ask for forgiveness from the deceased. After the farewell is over, the body is covered with a shroud. The coffin is closed with a lid, after the funeral it can no longer be opened. With the singing of the Trisagion, the deceased is carried out of the temple, the procession moves to the burial place. There is a procedure if it is not possible to deliver the deceased to the temple or invite the clergyman home.

burial

The burial must be completed before sunset. By the time the body is delivered to the burial site, the grave must be ready. If the burial is carried out without a funeral service, the coffin is closed at the dug grave, after giving the audience the opportunity to finally say goodbye to the deceased. Over the open coffin, the last speeches are made, the merits and good deeds of the deceased are remembered. The coffin is lowered into the grave on long towels. Those gathered take turns throwing a handful of earth on the lid of the coffin, the relatives are the first to pass. You can briefly pray to yourself with the words: God rest the soul of your newly-departed servant (name), and forgive him all his sins, free and involuntary, and grant him the Kingdom of Heaven. This prayer is also performed at a memorial dinner before a new dish.

May be accompanied by a number of customs and ritual actions:

Together with the coffin, church candles that burned in the temple during the funeral ceremony are lowered into the grave.
Small coins are thrown into the grave. This custom is interpreted as buying the deceased a place in the cemetery from the "owner" of the underworld or a place in the next world, payment for passage to another world.
After instillation, a tear handkerchief is left on the grave.

These customs have pagan roots, but do not contradict Orthodox canons.

A temporary Orthodox cross or obelisk, another sign with a photograph of the deceased, name and dates of life is installed on the grave hill. A permanent monument can be installed no earlier than the next year after the burial. The grave is usually buried by working cemeteries - diggers. After the burial, the custom prescribes to treat the workers with traditional funeral dishes and vodka for the repose of the soul. Leftover food is scattered on the grave to attract birds.

The funeral of military personnel, participants in the war and hostilities, employees of law enforcement agencies is accompanied by a salute from small arms.

In the old days, there was an interesting ritual - hidden alms. For 40 days after the burial, relatives secretly laid out alms for poor neighbors on the windows and on the porch - bread, eggs, pancakes, pieces of canvas, etc. The gifted had to pray for the deceased, while it was believed that they took part of the sins to themselves. Associated with the distribution of alms are the customs of handing out tearful handkerchiefs, pies, and sweets. in some places, new wooden spoons were distributed so that the deceased was remembered every time they ate. Wealthy relatives could make large donations for a new bell (it was believed that the bell could rescue a sinful soul from hell). There was a custom to give a neighbor a rooster so that he would sing for the sins of the deceased.

Remembrance

The funeral ends with a memorial dinner, to which everyone is invited. The commemoration serves not only to remind the deceased, but also personifies the continuation of life. The memorial meal has certain features in the choice and sequence of dishes. The basis, the head of nutrition in Russian traditions was bread, flour products. Wake begins and ends with pancakes or pancakes with honey, kutya. Kutya, depending on local characteristics, is prepared from wheat grains boiled in honey, rice with sugar and raisins.

Meat soup or soup is served on the first course. For the second, porridge (barley, millet) or potatoes with meat are prepared. Separate appetizers can be served with fish, jelly. On fasting days, meat is replaced with fish and mushrooms. A sweet third is required. According to old traditions, the third should be oatmeal jelly, but nowadays it is replaced with compote. Separate snacks can be fried fish, jelly. At the wake, they are treated to vodka, women can be offered wine.

Mandatory attribute are pies with meat, cabbage, sweets. Pies are distributed to those present so that they treat them to their household.

Wakes are held on the 9th and 40th day. Day 9 means an appeal to 9 angelic ranks, which act as those asking God for indulgence and pardon for a sinful soul. From the 9th day after the funeral to the 40th, the soul is doomed to wander through the ordeals, representing visits to various places where sins were committed. Angels must help the soul overcome sinful obstacles on the way to another world. The Creator does not initially assign the soul to either hell or heaven. Within 40 days, the deceased atones for his sins, an assessment of the deed good and evil is carried out. The wake is held in the form of a memorial meal. At the time of the commemoration, the house is cleaned in the same way as during the farewell to the deceased within 3 days after death.

Day 40 is the last day of the soul's stay in this world. On this day, the Supreme Court is held, the soul returns for a while to its former home and remains there until the farewell - commemoration. If the farewell is not arranged, the deceased will suffer. On the 40th day, the further extraterrestrial life of a person is determined. There is a custom for 40 days to hang a towel in the corner of the house. The soul, returning home after ordeals, wipes itself with a towel and rests.

Sweet pies are an obligatory dish of the funeral table

Prayer is able to alleviate the fate of a sinful soul in extraterrestrial life, so the relatives of the deceased order a funeral service (mass) in the church with the remembrance of the deceased for 6 weeks after death - magpie. Instead of Mass, you can order a reading of Magpie to a reader who reads the canon for 40 days in the house of the deceased. The names of the dead are recorded in the annual commemoration - synodic.

Mourning for the head of the family is observed for a longer time than for the elderly. Externally, mourning is expressed in wearing dark clothes.

Women wear a black headscarf for 40 days after the funeral. During the period of mourning, they often visit the deceased at the cemetery, go to church, refuse entertainment and celebrations. Longer periods of mourning characterize the severity of the loss. Mothers of dead children and young widows observe mourning for up to a year or more. With regard to deceased elderly parents, spouse in old age, mourning can be reduced to 6 weeks. Men adhere to the mourning form of clothing to participate in funeral rites; on other days, mourning is not outwardly expressed.

Below you will find signs that people who have buried a loved one need to know - when you can open the mirror after the funeral, do cleaning and repairs, watch TV. There are many restrictions and prohibitions that were invented by our ancestors, for the most part, back in pre-Christian times.

When to open the mirror

A well-known fact - after the death of a person, it is supposed to close all reflective surfaces. These are not only mirrors, but also TVs, computer monitors and other things in which you can see your reflection. This is done so that the reflection of the deceased does not remain in the house, and his ghost is not alive.

About when you can open the mirror after the funeral, it will take a lot. One at a time, you can do it right away after returning from the cemetery and commemoration. According to other beliefs, this is done after three days, or not earlier than the ninth day after death. But these are all modern traditions. In the villages to this day they remove the curtains from the mirrors only on the 41st day when the fate of the soul of the deceased has already been decided.

Signs are based on the path of the deceased. So, after three days after death, the guardian angel takes him to inspect paradise. For 9 days, he will appear before the Lord and go to inspect hell. On the 40th day, the soul is given the final verdict on where it will stay. Since only the first three days after death the soul is among the living, you can open the mirrors after it leaves it. That is, on the fourth day. It used to be that all 40 days the soul can visit relatives from time to time. Therefore, they did not open the mirrors all this time.

Sometimes the mirrors do not hang at all. For example, when a person died in a hospital, and his body is taken to the cemetery from the morgue, and not from home. It is not right. The soul of a person will still return home and stay near people close to him during his lifetime. Sometimes only those mirrors that are located where the deceased is located are closed. It is also not true, because the soul will wander through all the rooms of the house.

Some Slavic signs claim that the one who first looks into the mirror opened after the funeral will soon die. To prevent this, the cat is brought to the mirror first. She is not afraid of this sign.

Can I watch TV

For obvious reasons, there are no old signs about this, but as mentioned above, TVs are supposed to be closed, like mirrors. You can open them simultaneously with mirrors. That is, either after the funeral, or after the third, ninth or fortieth day.

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The church does not prohibit watching TV, but recommends to refrain from entertainment at least nine days. You can watch news, educational programs, but it is better to postpone watching movies and talk shows. You can not turn on the TV in the house where the deceased lies. Wait until the funeral is over. If the deceased was not a person close to you, the restriction does not apply to you.

These rules also apply to listening to music. The exception is church hymns. If you have such a desire, you can listen to classical music. By the way, the funeral orchestra is a Soviet innovation. In the old days, they were accompanied by prayers and religious chants.

Do you keep photos of the dead?

The answer is yes. Photos are memories of a dear person, a memory for his grandchildren and great-grandchildren. By destroying photographs of the deceased, you allow his descendants to never know about him.

But still the image of the deceased is associated with world of the dead. Psychics can tell from a photo whether a person is alive or not. Therefore, it is not worth looking at photographs of the deceased too often. You can also not overdo it with their number on the walls, shelves and tables. Do not hang near portraits of living people, separate living and dead energies. The best place for storage is a photo album.

Much more negative are the photographs taken during the funeral. It's best not to do them. But, if there are already photos, it is better to destroy them. It doesn't matter what is depicted there - a coffin, a cemetery, a funeral process, they are a strong source of necrotic energy.

When to clean the apartment

While there is a dead person in the house, cleaning and taking out the trash is not allowed. Otherwise, another person in this house may die. According to legend, the cleaner will sweep or wash him out of the dwelling.

You need to clean up immediately after the removal of the coffin. For the deceased, they sweep and wash the floors at a time when the mourners on their last journey have already left for the cemetery. This is done to immediately sweep away death, illness, grief from the house.

Moreover, such light cleaning cannot be done by blood relatives of the deceased. It is better for them to contact the emanations of death less, so that the deceased does not take his loved ones with him. Do not clean up after the dead and pregnant women. Usually one of the family friends is asked to sweep and mop the floor. Only he must remain in the apartment after the removal of the coffin. After that, the person joins the mourners at the wake, he is not present at the cemetery.

Some things are especially strongly saturated with the energy of death. So, the stools or table on which the coffin stood are taken out into the street for several days and left there with their legs up. This is done in order to get rid of this energy. The apartment has a balcony.

Be sure to take everything from the house that is connected with the mournful ceremony. These are the remnants of fabric for upholstery of the coffin, chips from it, as well as other ritual paraphernalia, except for a portrait with a black ribbon, a glass of water and a piece of bread. All flowers brought by the mourners are supposed to be left on the grave - they are intended for the deceased.

They also do not leave in the house the tool that was used to take measurements for the coffin, it brings death to another tenant during the year. Nothing is taken from the coffin. The ropes with which they tied the hands of the deceased, the pennies that lay in front of their eyes - all this should remain in the coffin. Candles are taken to the cemetery, as well as the grain in which they stood. It is also impossible to store the icon that stood in front of the coffin. She is allowed down the river or taken to the church.

When is it possible to clean up after the funeral, if the question is general cleaning or tidying up the room of the deceased? At any time, but after the commemoration or the removal of the coffin. If at the same time you open the mirrors, they should also be washed. If you decide to keep them closed for 3, 9, or 40 days, save that for later.

Is it possible to make repairs

Repair after the funeral can be done, but only as it passes 40 days after death. The soul of the deceased visits from time to time to see how loved ones live. She would like to see the familiar environment, changes can anger the spirit.

After 40 days, at least, it will be necessary to replace the bed on which the deceased slept, as well as the bed (sofa, floor or staircase covering, armchair, etc.) that has become a deathbed. The bed of a dead person must not be used by his bloodline. It can be given away or sold. Putting a new bed is optional, use the freed space as you see fit.

The place of death will exude necrotic energy for several more years. Therefore, it is supposed to replace everything that came into contact with the dying, be it the floor covering where he fell, or furniture and bed linen. As a rule, such things are thrown away or burned. In the villages, they act a little differently - they take them to the chicken coop for three, so that the rooster "sings all the negativity."

Deceased's personal belongings, as a rule, distribute to the poor or sell. This doesn't just apply to clothes. Favorite cup or plate, ashtray, anti-stress toy - you should not keep it all. Although many leave in memory of the deceased.

What else not to do after the funeral

In the house where the person died, you can not do laundry. This prohibition is valid while the coffin is in the house. That is, after the funeral, you can start putting your clothes in order.

Can I swim after the funeral? Beliefs recommend doing this at the same time when you decide to remove the fabric from reflective surfaces. That is, immediately after the commemoration, in three, nine or forty days. In the old days, they washed only on the 41st day after death.

Among the things not to do after the funeral are noisy holidays. It is undesirable to arrange celebrations within 40 days. Birthday celebration better to reschedule or cancel altogether. But you can celebrate it modestly, in the family circle, without loud music and noise.

The nine-day, and preferably forty-day ban also applies to the wedding, but here everything depends on the emotional state of the relatives of the deceased. In addition, a wedding is a pre-arranged event associated with high costs. If you are getting married earlier than forty days have passed since the death of a relative, during the celebration you need to mention this and pay tribute to the memory of the deceased. Weddings are allowed at any time.

Many believe that among the things not to do after the funeral of a loved one are trips and travel. This is not true. They will help to distract, but during the trip it is worth giving up various entertainment activities. Do not forget to remember the deceased and pray for his soul during the holidays.

In addition, the relatives of the deceased cannot sew and have their hair cut for forty days. If there is a need to repair clothes, you will have to do this. But tailoring, which is not urgent, should be postponed. The same goes for haircuts. Bangs interfere with daily activities? Get rid of her. But if it's about changing your image, do it in forty days.

The same amount of time for the family of the deceased you can't drink alcohol. Perhaps the ban is due to the fact that grief is an accomplice of alcoholism. But funeral signs also forbid drinking at the wake. The reason is that alcoholism is a sin. For forty days, relatives can pray for a sinful person. If at this time they sin, it will only complicate his afterlife.

After the funeral, they go only to the wake, and from there - home. You can’t go to visit, otherwise death will come to that house. You can visit or go on business only on the day following the funeral and commemoration. The commemoration is also the ninth and fortieth day, and after them this prohibition also applies. You can also not go to celebrations that take place in public places - birthdays, weddings.

They don't go from wake to wake. If two deceased are commemorated on the same day, choose the one who is closer to you. But you can also say goodbye to several dead people, support relatives, and express grief. During the funeral, do not visit the graves of relatives and friends. This time you came to only one deceased, and visiting others will be regarded as disrespectful.

Church opinion

There are many beliefs that are supposed to be observed after the funeral. This will help protect against necrotic energy, diseases and other troubles. In addition, some signs are aimed at improving the afterlife of the deceased and his cleansing from sins.

Good afternoon Valentine!
The main signs say that it is especially impossible during a funeral:
Throw living flowering plants after the coffin on the way to the churchyard and already on it. Anyone who steps on the branches will receive damage.
Pick up flowers thrown to the ground during the procession. With this self-imposed gesture, you accept a bad fate.
Gnaw seeds and spit. There will be dental problems.
Sing songs and have fun (unless, of course, the deceased has left special orders in this regard). Offend the soul of the newly deceased.
Pick up any object dropped to the ground.
To voluntarily descend into the grave, even if you have dropped something very valuable down. Consider that you paid for some sin and rejoice. If you go down, you will certainly die soon.
Stand at an open grave, balancing on the very edge. If you manage to fall into the grave at a funeral, you can say goodbye to life.
The burial procedure itself must be carried out carefully and without excesses. However, sometimes there are various troubles that promise troubles in the future. Bad omens during the funeral warn about this.
If already at the moment of burial it suddenly turns out that the dug hole is clearly smaller in size, then this is a hint: the earth does not want to accept the remains of a sinner. There is nothing you can do about it - just remember. If the pit is larger in size, then another relative or friend will leave after it. It is bad if the pit collapses during the burial process. This is a sign of new death. Moreover, a collapse in the southern part promises the departure of men, in the north - women, in the west - children, in the east - the elderly.
By the way, folk superstitions and signs at funerals strongly discourage pregnant women and children from appearing. The former risk giving birth to a dead or sick child, the latter have too weak energy. Therefore, it is better to say goodbye to the deceased at home, and to replace the trip to the cemetery with a less sad occupation.
Speaking of Christian traditions:
During the preparation of the body, burial, and in a certain period after the funeral, a number of rules apply, the violation of which, according to the Orthodox Church, is fraught with serious consequences. Here are some of them:
The funeral is best done on the third day after the death of a person.
You can not bury the dead on Sunday and New Year.
Immediately after death, all the mirrors in the house must be curtained, and the clock must be stopped. In this state, they must be 40 days.
Never leave the deceased alone in the room for a minute.
It is forbidden to take the deceased out of the house before noon and after sunset.
Pregnant women and children are not advised to participate in the ceremony.
From the moment of death until the burial, the relatives of the deceased must continuously read the Psalter.
You can wash the body of the deceased only during daylight hours.
Pregnant women and those who are menstruating may not bathe the deceased.
Funeral clothes should be elegant and light, shroud - white. If an unmarried girl dies, she is dressed in a wedding dress.
In the house where the person died, a candle or lamp should be lit until the end of the funeral. It is better to use a glass of wheat as a candlestick.
You can not wash, sweep and sweep dust if there is a dead person in the house.
It is not recommended to keep animals in the same room as the coffin.
In the presence of the deceased, they greet not with a voice, but with a nod of the head.
The eyes and mouth of the deceased must be closed. For this purpose, the lower jaw is tied with a handkerchief, and coins are placed on the eyes.
A chaplet, a long paper or fabric strip with prayers and images of saints, is placed on the forehead of the deceased.
Be sure to wear a pectoral cross on the deceased.
Together with the body, all his personal belongings are placed in the coffin: prostheses, glasses, watches, etc.
The hands of the deceased must be folded on the chest with a cross. And put the right one on top of the left.
The feet and hands of the deceased must be bound. Before burial, the strings are removed and placed in the coffin.
Cotton pads should be placed under the head, shoulders and legs of the deceased in the coffin.
The heads of dead women should be covered with a scarf. Also, all women present at the funeral must have a headdress.
It is forbidden to put fresh flowers in the coffin, only artificial or dried ones.
The coffin with the dead is taken out of the house feet first and accompanied by church hymns.
When taking the coffin out of the house, it is necessary to say: “The deceased is one of the houses out” and close the people in the house or apartment for a few minutes.
After the removal of the coffin, all floors must be washed.
Blood relatives cannot carry the coffin and lid.
From the beginning of the ritual until the moment of burial, the left hand of the deceased should have a cross, and an icon on his chest, laid face to body. For women, the image of the Mother of God is placed on the chest, for men - the image of Christ the Savior.
You can go around the coffin with the deceased only at the head, bowing to him at the same time.
During the funeral, 4 lighted candles should stand around the coffin: at the head, at the feet and on the hands.
The funeral procession should go in strict sequence: a cross, an icon of Christ the Savior, a priest with a candle and a censer, a coffin with the deceased, relatives, other participants with flowers and wreaths.
Everyone who meets the funeral procession must cross himself. Men are additionally required to remove their headgear.
Saying goodbye to the deceased, it is necessary to kiss the halo on his forehead and the icon on his chest. If the coffin is closed, they are applied to the cross on the lid.
All those participating in the funeral procession must throw a handful of earth into the grave.
On the day of burial, one should not visit the graves of other relatives or acquaintances.
It is not recommended to look at the coffin with the deceased from the windows of a house or apartment.
After the funeral, the relatives of the deceased should present cakes, sweets and handkerchiefs to those present.
The chairs on which the coffin stood should be placed upside down during the day.
At the commemoration, only vodka is served from alcohol. You need to drink it without clinking glasses.
During the commemoration, a glass of vodka is poured for the deceased and covered with a slice of bread. After the commemoration, a glass of bread costs another 40 days.
Kutya must be present on the memorial table. This is where the memorial service begins.
Before entering your home after a funeral, you must clean your shoes and hold your hands over the flame of a candle.
After the funeral, guests cannot be visited during the day.
The next morning after the burial, relatives and friends should take breakfast to the grave.
Within a week from the date of death, nothing should be taken out of the house of the deceased. Things of the deceased can be distributed no earlier than 40 days after burial.
6 weeks after the funeral in the house where the deceased lived, there should be a glass of water and a plate of food on the windowsill.
On the graves of young men and women near the head, it is recommended to plant viburnum.
One can only speak well of a dead person.
For the dead, you can’t cry and kill yourself a lot.
See here for details.

The death of a loved one is a relatively sudden phenomenon, because in most cases no one expects it. When this happens, many people are often resentful and lost, not expecting such a turn of events. That is why it is so important to know in advance about some principles and norms of behavior when he is in the house, so as not to aggravate the already unenviable situation of his relatives and relatives.

It is believed that a person tying knots on rags at the moment when the coffin with the deceased is taken out of the house brings damage to the family of the deceased!

How to behave in the house with the deceased

In the house, the deceased, one should not talk loudly and, moreover, laugh.

Relatives of the deceased should curtain all the mirrors, since it is believed that the mirror is an otherworldly portal in which the soul of the deceased, who is at that moment in the house, can get lost. In principle, there is a more sensible thing for this: mirrors should be closed only so that it does not distract anyone. In addition, it is not pleasant when the coffin with the deceased is reflected in the mirror.

Mourning begins immediately after and is accompanied by robes of dark or black tones. Do not wear light-coloured clothing during this time. Everyone determines for himself how long he needs to be in a state of mourning. This time has no clear boundaries.

Being in the house with the deceased, it is necessary to remove all silver jewelry and things from him. If the deceased was a believer, then he should be put on his neck.

You should not put a glass of water (or vodka) covered with a piece of bread near the portrait of the deceased. According to legend, the soul of the deceased will never come to this glass, but only demons will come.

Relatives of the deceased should wash his body only during daylight hours. The water used for washing must be poured into a specially dug hole in a place where people do not go.

While in the house, you do not need to arrange laundry. This is considered a bad omen. Also, you should not allow someone to sit on while the coffin with him is in the house.

If someone is afraid to be in the house with the deceased, he should be advised to overcome his fear by holding the legs of the deceased for a while.

Everyone who came to say goodbye to the deceased must take off their hats before entering the house.

The coffin with the deceased, as well as the lid from the coffin, cannot be carried to the relatives of the deceased. It is believed that in this way it is possible to provoke another grief in the family.

Sooner or later, each of us becomes a participant in a difficult but necessary funeral ceremony. Regardless of whether you are a close relative of the deceased or your presence is just a tribute to the rules of decency, you need to cope with emotions and behave correctly at the funeral. If you know the basic rules of funeral etiquette in advance, it will be easier for you to choose the optimal behavior model later.

Below are some mandatory rules:

Wardrobe. Of course, a funeral is not an event where smart clothes are appropriate. Give preference to dark tones. Women must be covered. Carry a few clean handkerchiefs with you.

Conversations. In all places of the funeral procession, loud or excited conversations are not allowed, and even more so - laughter is strictly forbidden. It is not correct to comment or criticize the deceased, his relatives or the nuances of organizing a funeral.

Help. If you notice that someone is on the verge of an emotional breakdown, suggest. Sometimes it is enough to provide; or vice versa - bring to the conversation and provoke tears. In some cases, you can get medical help in time. Sometimes there is a need for physical removal of the body of the deceased, the lid of the coffin, etc.

Tolerance. Relatives and close circle of the deceased may behave overly emotionally at the funeral. Sometimes breakdowns into sobs, and even screams are possible. This should not cause a negative reaction from other guests. If it is difficult for you to restrain emotions yourself, it is better for them to go out in a secluded place or wait for the completion of a public farewell ceremony

Wake. Don't show up to a memorial service without an invitation. Also, do not need to take with you to the funeral. In the memorial hall, you can’t take the place left for the deceased (as a rule, this is a place with clean cutlery, a knife and fork lying on a glass of water, on top of which lies bread). Alcohol is not allowed at funerals.

Honor the memory of the deceased. Memories, condolences, mournful speeches and appeals are expressed in a civil farewell ceremony, to or directly to close relatives.

In whatever status you are present at the funeral - do not lose your temper. Wisdom and patience to you!