The main thing in life is to make the right choice. The right choice: what skills will be useful

The other day, two completely different people approached me with the same question: how to make the right choice from equal opportunities?
Would giving up one in favor of the other be a move forward, or would it simply be a sign of weakness and/or irresponsibility?
What if the first opportunity is still better than the second? How to decide and make a choice that you won’t regret later?

By the way, thinking people often encounter the problem of choice - this is normal. But sometimes this problem can cause an even bigger problem, like a nervous breakdown. And for some comrades, who are especially afraid of making mistakes and miscalculation, this process can drag on for many years of painful inaction. Up to complete Buridan collapse.

So. Let’s say you need to choose between a new, but unknown line of business, which in theory promises great prospects, and an old, but proven business, with boring methods, but with a predictable result. Or between cooperation with a new company or an old one. Or between guest participation in someone's event or creating your own. Or between the romance of a new relationship or the establishment of an old one.

The point is not what options you have to choose from. This can generally be a choice of where to go on vacation in the summer. The problem is that they will start giving advice. And then the problem begins, actually, weighing all the pros and cons and other moral vacillations.

On the one hand, your thoughts and/or feelings soar about new prospects, drawing rosy pictures, on the other hand: “What if it doesn’t work out?”, “There’s no going back,” “I’ll lose a lot of time,” etc. , and so on.

All these fluctuations will drag on from day to day, from month to month, from year to year. The biggest problem with this condition is not even that you cannot make a choice, believe me. The biggest problem is that It takes all your energy to make the right choice.. Those. You can no longer work with full dedication on what you have now and you cannot give it up to do something else.

And, if you think that the main thing is to make a decision, even according to the principle of “was it or was it not” and “in the deep end,” I have bad news for you. Downright depressing. It won't get any easier.

Because the problem will turn 180 degrees. Because there is no path on which everything would be fabulously easy and cool, you would not need to do anything except eat marshmallows and marmalade and wash it all down with nectar and ambrosia (ugh, what disgusting!) - there will be difficulties on any path, but there will be no turning back.

Because suddenly it turns out that the choice you made closes the opportunity to choose what you could have chosen, but did not choose!

And then you start wringing your hands: “I shouldn’t have started this after all! What if it would have been better differently? instead of putting all your energy into creating a new business. You simply don’t have enough strength for this. This was the problem of the old woman with a broken trough - constant dissatisfaction.

In fact, the main problem is that It is human nature to believe that there is only one right choice even in everyday matters.

Illustration

So that you do not fall into seriousness, we will use Agafya Tikhonovna’s monologue from Gogol’s “Marriage” as an illustration. The actress who plays this role simply delighted me.

So, a person is ready to endlessly spend his precious time finding this one solution that will solve all his problems and thinking about how to make the right choice. But in reality everything is different from what it actually is: any goal can be achieved in different ways if you know exactly what your goal is. In fact, torment is more common to those who do not know exactly what they want.

Remember what happens when you make the final choice? Your inner world calms down, gets in order, you begin to look for ways to achieve your goals, you have the energy to achieve them, you are ready to learn new things, and be patient with temporary difficulties. You are determined to achieve your goal.

The most dangerous thing in this situation is to allow yourself to ask: “What if it would have been better differently?”

This question instantly throws you off balance and plunges you into a state of internal chaos. Because if you ignore the choice you have already made, you no longer invest energy in its implementation, you stop acting, and it naturally fades away and withers away - the second law of thermodynamics, to which there are no exceptions. And after a while it clearly seems to you that he is not really a fountain, and therefore you need to reject him and start something else.

But this choice was not objectively wrong. It was you who made him this way with your attitude to business, who destroyed him with your own idleness, irresponsibility or negativity.

It all comes down to the fact that people change throughout life. What was important and significant for him yesterday may not have the slightest meaning today. If at 15 years old girls dream of handsome and romantic princes, at 20 years old about flamboyant princes in Mercedes, at 35 years old, an already accomplished woman needs a partner whom she can trust and rely on. You just need to accept this fact and then the questions: right/wrong will disappear by themselves.

After all, in fact, this or that choice is a choice of a way to achieve some goal. And the main importance is to preserve inner peace and inner harmony when making choices. If you have made a choice and are endlessly tormented from within and are trying to explain it to everyone, justify it, prove its correctness, this is an indicator that you yourself are not confident in it, and this choice is uncomfortable for you for one reason or another.

You can, of course, consult with more experienced comrades, but as the wise Athos used to say: “People ask for advice only to not follow it, and if they follow it, it’s only so that they have someone to blame for the consequences.” The decision is yours to make in any case, even if you followed the advice of a friend. It's your decision not to think with your own head..

Other people have a different worldview, different values, a different idea of “what is good and what is bad.”
They do not know your situation fully, they do not know what would actually be best for you in this situation, they judge everything from their side and their experience.

Therefore, I would advise you in such situations to use a selection technique based on your current values. Considering that the problem of choice arises when there are several options, each of which is significant and attractive, has its own important advantages, You will simply choose a path that will correspond to your real values, etc. you can make a choice quickly and painlessly.

For a while, forget about which options you are choosing between. In any case, you have an understanding of what goals you want to achieve and what attracts you to it.

We take a piece of paper and write the benefits and advantages in the column of the table and horizontally.

It is advisable that the description of what you ultimately want to receive is comprehensive. There can be as many points as you like, but not less than ten. There is only one condition - all these points must be important and significant for you.

You will get a table with a complete list of benefits and advantages horizontally and vertically.

Now you need to shade one square of the table diagonally from the first point.

The next step, on a separate piece of paper, write down point by point those benefits that are significant and attractive to you for each choice option. Write down only those that are clearly inherent in this option. If in doubt, skip it.

Now prioritize your values by asking yourself for each pair of benefits: What is more important to me? Be sure to choose. There can be no 50/50. For what is more significant, we put one, and for what is less significant in comparison, we put zero. Those. If you want to create, but at the moment you feel that guaranteed income is more important than creativity, that means one in guaranteed income, zero in creativity.

And so on until all available options are compared. This is a great way to identify a huge number of fictitious values that are in fact of little significance to you.

Now make a calculation for each advantage and you will know exactly what is most important and significant for you at this stage for this goal and you will be able to make the right choice intelligently.

If you don’t know Excel and are too lazy to do all this manually, I have prepared a template for you that you can use to clarify your values for any purpose.

After you have revealed your true values using this table, you can compare which choice option these values most correspond to.

Now that the choice has been made taking into account your values,

concentrate on your choice
provide him with all the resources necessary for active development - abilities, energy, emotions, thoughts, lively participation.
Act, act, act!

If you do this steadily, consistently, persistently, you will achieve your goal. No options.

In life, we make choices every day, small or life-changing. Whether you know what the consequences will be or not, whether you want to do it or not, it doesn’t matter. Even by deciding not to do anything, you are already committing an action that will entail certain changes. Therefore, it is so important to learn how to choose the best option for yourself, no matter what happens and no matter who tries to manipulate you.

Let's figure out how to make the right choice

There is no one right solution for everyone. It always depends on who receives it, on his character, knowledge, intentions, experience, and even mood. So don't try to blindly follow what others say. Only you know what you need. But you shouldn’t refuse help if you are sure that someone’s knowledge will help minimize risks. Avoid those who have not been able to achieve anything in life and do not waste time listening to their monologue about what they would do.

Very often we are afraid to move from words to action for one single reason: we are afraid to make a mistake. And the reasons for this fear lie in self-doubt. It seems to us that we are not smart, good or strong enough so as not to stumble and cause even more problems. To get rid of such doubts, it is important to realize that having decided to act, you are already mentally prepared to overcome everything, no matter what happens. Take it for granted.

The choice is always difficult and unpredictable, no matter how hard we try to foresee everything, and the desire to make it, and not shift responsibility to someone else, is in itself worthy of respect. You have something to love and believe in yourself for. You have where to draw strength to do your best. Understand the full consequences if something goes wrong, and prepare for any eventuality. This will allow you to get rid of unnecessary thoughts.

Psychologists are unanimous that it is much more useful to move forward than to remain in place and wait for the right moment, which may not come. Only those who do nothing make no mistakes. True, few people think that this is also a kind of choice that entails consequences, and as life shows, not always successful.

By refusing to do anything, people still make a choice, only an unconscious one, but a forced one, the consequences of which they cannot even approximately calculate. It is safer to follow your own path rather than leave it to chance. This is what should be the motivating factor in case of any doubts and reluctance to solve problems. It will not be possible to constantly avoid the fight for what is dear, life will still be buried under the rubble of problems and troubles, and there will be no strength to fix it.

Analyzing available information and your own capabilities to make a decision is not easy. And here you can’t do without patience and applying the well-known proverb “Measure seven times, and then cut” in a difficult life situation. Let it become a motto when thinking about any plans. You should never rush where your future is at stake, but there is no need to be afraid either. Everything is in your hands, mistakes can be corrected, but lost time cannot be returned. Everything needs a “golden” mean.

A person’s entire life is associated with risk and a high probability of error, and nothing can be done about it. But you won’t be able to reach your heights by ceding the right to decide for you to all and sundry, as the saying goes: “He who doesn’t take risks, doesn’t drink champagne.” Therefore, learn to embrace everything new and make the most of what you are capable of, and you will always be able to make the best choice for yourself. You cannot stumble when you are aware of what and why you are doing, even if you then have to get up again and move forward.

Photo: how to make the right choice

Top 7 how to make the right choice

You can make a wise decision with the right information. And it doesn’t matter whether this concerns some general issues, such as training or place of work, or purely individual ones: achieving success or happiness in your personal life. Before making a choice, study any available data on your topic, everything you can find. Read the stories of those who have experienced similar things. This will allow you to get a more complete picture of all existing options for getting out of this situation. And even if they don’t fit, you can always use them to develop the one you need.
It is equally important to learn how to use the information received. This will not only reduce the time it takes to implement your own plans, but will also give you strength in a difficult situation. Nothing scares a person more than uncertainty. Having a large baggage of a wide variety of knowledge, you can use it in the most unexpected cases, thereby reducing risks. It is easy to benefit from any information if you train yourself to perceive it not as external noise, but to be ready to hear, read or see what is worth applying in your life. For example, you want to earn a million. Take a closer look at articles dedicated to people who managed to achieve this. Maybe one of their ideas or concepts will suit you too, and who knows if it won't turn out to be a real goldmine.

To make it easier to imagine the future, write down on a piece of paper what you want to get from a certain situation. Which choice will satisfy your interests and which will satisfy the rest of the participants. Think about how each of the possible options can affect your future plans, tasks and goals. Evaluate them in terms of importance and the benefits they will bring. Choose the one you like best. After analyzing all the components, evaluate how important each of them is for all participants, and especially for you. At this moment, you will feel whether you want to take care of yourself exclusively or whether this is the case when caring for another will bring much more joy than your own benefit, although we do good deeds for our own sake.
It’s difficult to choose, despite all the faith in yourself, think about how this or that decision will affect the future. What will change after you do exactly that. Will this cause much damage, will it bring success, what new tasks or difficulties may arise, what will be required to solve them. Run through possible scenarios in your head, analyze them, imagine the biggest problems that could arise, and listen to yourself. After such a close and detailed study, you will know exactly which option is the most acceptable and safe.

Learn to compare the pros and cons. The choice with more advantages is considered more correct. But sometimes our fears prevent us from correctly assessing the prospects that open up. For example, you want to move to another city or change jobs, your inner self begins to protest because you are trying to get out of your comfort zone. A lot of positive aspects immediately arise in the existing situation, from which, in fact, you are tired, but despite this, you begin to doubt and refuse what you need. And there is nothing to counter these doubts, because you know nothing about how these fundamental changes will affect your future life. The decision in such a situation is best made based on how great your need for change is, how much stronger it is than the fear of the unknown.
Once you have thought through the most likely scenarios, imagine their implementation step by step. Think through in great detail what will happen if you go one way or another. There is no other way to ensure that you have taken into account all known risks and are prepared to do everything in your power.

The right choice most often depends on whether you are able to understand what you are giving up when you decide to do this and not otherwise. Only when a person gains more than he loses does he determine whether he made the right decision. After all, only then does he always win.

There are no people who could accurately predict what changes will happen in their lives if they try to achieve what they want in one way or another or give it up altogether. It is impossible to live without mistakes and wrong actions; we are not given the opportunity to be perfect. We are people with all our advantages and disadvantages, which some are able to fight, but others are not. But we have the power to take responsibility for everything, no matter what we do or say. And then you yourself will not even notice how you will learn to trust your intuition, and any choice you make will be the most correct at a certain time and in a certain place.

“To take your place in life, you need to learn to choose.” From the movie "Practice"

The day has ended when every Russian citizen could make his choice. Choosing your future life. Today we chose the future President of our country. In order to decide and correctly make a choice, we were given time. During this time, we have drowned in advertising and propaganda of ideas, views, programs, calls of presidential candidates. Tired. But in general, we went to the elections with a ready-made decision and returned home with a sense of fulfilled civic duty.

Is there a person among us who tonight regretted his choice and realized that he was mistaken? Or does this also take time?

In fact, my article is not about elections. An article about - how to make a choice. The elections of March 4, 2012 were just a relevant reason for writing an article.

Wikipedia deciphers the concept of “Choice” for us from the point of view of psychology and technology. In psychology, Choice means having different options for exercising one's will. And technical activity classifies Choice as the resolution of uncertainty in human activity in the face of a plurality of alternatives. What did we have more of today: the availability of options or the real opportunity to resolve uncertainty?

It seems to me that many of us made today’s choice under pressure. Do you know the parable “Fish oil for a dog”?

“One man decided to give his Doberman fish oil: he was told that it was very beneficial for the dog. Every day he pinned the struggling dog's head between his knees, forcibly opened its jaws and pushed fat down its throat.

One day the dog escaped and spilled grease on the floor. Then, to the great surprise of the owner, he returned and began to lick the puddle. It turned out that he was not opposed to the fish oil itself, but to the way in which it was infused into him.” I don’t like the way they force us to make our choice today.

Every person in his life every second is faced with the need to make hundreds of decisions, sometimes without even realizing that he is making a choice at that very moment. Most often, when choosing, a person is guided by the lesser of evils. But when the need arises to choose not from two options, but from three, five, ten possibilities, then very often a person finds himself in a dead end. Exit from which may take a long time. As a result, we end up with missed opportunities.

How to make your choice correctly?

Are there special techniques and techniques that would help a person turn missed opportunities into real ones? Is there something that would help us not to suffer for years, choosing from several options?

What does choice mean to me?

For me, the answer to this question is always a very simple action - a decision. A decision is something that can be done in just a few seconds, albeit after you have thoroughly prepared for it.

I understand mine very well personal responsibility for your choice. If I trust the opinions and advice of other people, then I shift this responsibility onto the shoulders of the advisers. What does not allow me to step on my own rake, which they teach me to live and choose. I don't want to let others make their own choices for me.

I should be interested in my decision. I must have the desire to make the right choice. That is, motivation.

I must have my own system of criteria for selection. Each of us has perfect tools that can help us make choices. These are our eyes, hearing, memory, smell, experience, intuition. Let's turn it on and act.

I think the easiest choice is for people who have a rich imagination and the ability to think big. Since such talents are in their infancy, I can assume that in a situation of choice such people can project a picture of the “future” in their imagination.

Great technique for decision making

In difficult situations of choice, the “scales” technique helps me. I imagine in my imagination the scales, on each of which I “add up” the advantages and disadvantages, the pros and cons. I wait until the cup of merit is outweighed, and I boldly choose it.

I learned to understand that no matter what I choose - it is my choice, my way, my road. A little pompous, but it's better to be enthusiastic about one of the possible options and squeeze everything out of it that you can, while the doubting pessimists are tormented by thoughts of how many opportunities they have lost.

Even the wise King Solomon said: “Choice is not what we choose. Choice is what we give up. Every time you choose one thing, you give up everything else. Make it a rule to know what you are giving up. This will save you from useless tossing and unnecessary disappointments. Always remember this and your path will be pure and full of truth.”.

Although the same Solomon believed that there was no choice.

The consistency of our actions is what, year after year, gives us certain skills and confidence in the upcoming choice. Whether you choose randomly, or base your choice on your character traits, or you have to make a choice based on some criteria - accept your Choice. Get it and go on an interesting journey. Try to extract all possible pleasures and valuable experiences. Find your place in the current event or make a different choice. After all, you already know how to make a choice. Good luck to you!

I hope to see your opinions in the comments, dear readers. What do you use when you have to choose?

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11 comments

Having remembered successful and unsuccessful examples from business, I came to the conclusion that the main thing is the optimal balance of analytical preparation of the solution and its consistent implementation. The extremes - people of action and people-computers - are usually ineffective in the end.

Hello, Elena!
Your article helped me a lot when making a difficult decision. I was choosing between three faculties at the university, and since I was applying for the second time (after a year of studying at another university, I realized that it was absolutely not for me), I was afraid to make a mistake.

And now, when the choice has already been made, I am suffering again. It seems to me that I chose the wrong direction, but nothing can be changed. I MYSELF chose where I am studying now, but I just can’t make this decision... I thought and analyzed for a very long time, and I’m already so tired of it: no matter what I choose, it seems to me that this is not what I needed. And the worst thing is that your whole fate depends on this decision. The feeling of regret is corroding... I can’t believe that just recently I could have chosen any path.

I chose the specialty that was closer to me... But the faculty turned out to be not the best, they teach poorly there, they teach poorly, and in general it is falling apart... Maybe I should have gone to a good faculty with long-term traditions, and it doesn’t matter that I’m not so interested in the main subject like. But I would be in normal company. These thoughts haunt me.

Maybe you have some experience or advice?

The choice is small - not everyone hires pensioners... There are a lot of young people... And you twitch as if under electric current, and plus you think that in the end they will also pay for the goods... Go to another region closer to the sea because... life is not rubber and the minutes inexorably count down eternity..., you will be separated from your granddaughter for a long time, again because of these minutes that bring eternity closer...??? How to choose the right solution here???????

Elena, I can’t accept my choice. Six months ago I bought an apartment and the choice was between two apartments in a new building (in the same building). One corner apartment is on the 12th floor, the other apartment is on the 9th floor. The layouts are completely different, but the square footage is the same. Before purchasing, I weighed all the pros and cons. But at the time of purchase, the main criterion for me was that the corner apartment is on the 12th floor and I think that it will be ventilated, but for some reason at that time I forgot that this apartment has a large loggia along all the street walls, which will possibly protect against cold, the loggia can be insulated. The corner apartment has an excellent view of the entire city. At the time of purchase and now I am aware of all the disadvantages of the apartment, which is on the 9th floor and I am ready to compare it with them - this is a street wall in one of the rooms, the window overlooks the neighboring house, it will be possible to look into the windows of the neighbors. On the plus side, the apartment's windows face two sides - one window looks out onto the neighboring house, the other two windows into the courtyard. One of the dubious advantages can be attributed to the layout according to the type of vest. I can’t get rid of the thought that I was given the opportunity to live in an apartment with a gorgeous view of the city; for me it’s like living in a luxurious mansion, in which even the door handles are gold. I didn’t take advantage of this opportunity and chose an ordinary apartment on the 9th floor. And for me this thought is an unrealized opportunity to kill, not a day goes by without me thinking about it. Help cope with the remorse itself.

Hello Elena, please help me with advice. I am a very indecisive person, I have been working in one place for many years, they seem to be talking about layoffs, but they don’t say anything specifically. At this job I feel free, but bored. There are days when I go to hard labor. The salary is still satisfactory. Recently I was offered a new place, a new or different interesting job, but the salary is lower. And now I am undecided, what to do? Go? What if I regret it later? If I don’t switch, they’ll lay me off and I’ll lose everything. I’ve already broken my head, I can’t sleep at night, help!

Have you ever received a gift for which you thanked through gritted teeth, and after some time you realized how lucky you were with this thing? Often we do not immediately assess the significance of events in our lives correctly.

How to learn to make the right decisions when giving to what really deserves it, due to his ability Msome things can look tempting, and it’s not so easy to figure out which ones to focus on now and which ones to put off – maybe until the next life. After all, you can’t be two different people at the same time, just like you can’t be in two different places.

Perspective

The most important thing here is the ability to see things in perspective. Role momentary sensations is also important, sometimes we set them as our goal. However, more often than not, something else turns out to be more important - what happens to us after. After we talked to this person. Ate this food. We watched the film. They did something. The meaning and influence of various events on us is manifested only over time.

You know the popular consolation saying “Think about it, will you remember this in 5 years?” The secondary immediately fades into the background, but the main thing remains in sight. But sometimes we are so absorbed happening with us that we forget to answer this question.

With regard to perspective, it is worth remembering its two dimensions: depth and finitude.

Depth

What does this mean in terms of scale? all life? Yes, our life is not one day, but each individual day, one way or another, reflects it entirely. Do you want your whole life to be like this? Would you choose this for your entire life? How will this affect your future, because you will continue to live with this choice? Answering these questions when making a decision will show you care about yourself.

Limb

And this is a common method of thinking about death, remembering human life. Steve Jobs shared his experience of using it in his famous speech to Stanford graduates.

Our existence is Not infinite number of days. We rarely think about this because it is not easy to understand and accept the fact of our mortality. That the day will come when we will be gone. And the sun will continue to rise in the morning, the birds will continue to sing, but for someone else. Yes, it’s not easy to even think about it, let alone fully experience it! However, it is quite effective. After all exactly limitation something makes it so valuable. In this case, it is our time. And by being fully aware of this, we will make the right choices in life much more often.

Observation

The next point is probably already familiar to you. Listen to yourself. This is a skill that can and should be developed in oneself. For some this may be very difficult, because for observations you need to freeze for a while. Then you will be able to realize how something affects you. Knowing whether something specific is beneficial or harmful to you is very valuable.

Everyone has their own gradation of sensations that cause certain phenomena: “bad”, “normal”, “good”, “yes, this is just my heaven on earth”! In addition to the assessment pleasantries there is another side to the experience. Like this affects on us, who do we turn into as a result?

There are things that are incredibly tempting, but we can easily see that contact with them pulls us down.

And if we don’t see it, then those around us will tell us about it. Therefore, it is important to distinguish what level of pleasure you experience - soulful elation and enthusiasm or sheer pleasure, in which there is even something animalistic.

It's still worth watching what brings you satisfaction, evokes the emotion of meaning, fullness. This usually happens when you know something was done right and you feel good about it. After all, we all want to be needed, useful, and in one way or another, so this criterion will help you figure out what is truly important to you.

Learn to see

Sometimes things turn out differently. Something first makes us bewildered: “Why do I need this?”, and only then, having learned and appreciated, we find ourselves filled with gratitude. Moreover, it does not have to be some kind of misfortune, which then suddenly and unexpectedly turns into happiness. No, rather something, at first glance insignificant and

Usually it becomes clear quite quickly what's what. After all, it doesn’t take much time for a wolf to shed his sheep’s clothing, if that’s what he is. It’s the same with positive events that happen unexpectedly. Unless we ourselves prevent them from revealing themselves to us in all their beauty by complaining about their own. We thought this was good for us, but we got something else, perhaps even better, but we don’t want to admit it, because first we need to figure out why our(albeit more modest) desires were ignored.

Sometimes we are too caught up in protecting ourselves to accept that in reality we are much luckier than we expected. But when this finally happens, our heart is filled with joy and our soul with gratitude. Appreciate unplanned events like these. Things that came all of a sudden and made you happy. This will help you better recognize situations leading to them in the future and make the right choices in life.

Knowing yourself

What other skills are useful when you need to make a choice about what to give your attention and time to? First of all this. Exactly cognition, because we talked about knowledge above - what brings you satisfaction, joy, etc. Cognition is open process. It means you know something, but you never say it. You are always ready to try new ideas about yourself.

After all, our tastes and preferences change over time, and you may discover traits and predispositions in yourself that you had not noticed before. Until some events, for example, pull them out. You may suddenly realize what you would like to do. Such knowledge, even at the dream level, is already a great happiness if the knowledge is genuine. When you know, every day, it will be easy for you to make the right choice in your life, no matter what it is about.

Open approach

This open approach should be applied to other areas of life, not just self-image. It’s not for nothing that the slogan “you’ll never know” is so popular: until something happens, you will never know what it is, how it is, and what it can lead to.

Of course, everyone has personal experience, knowledge of themselves and their preferences, but you can’t step into the same water twice. Every time everything is a little different. Therefore, when there is an opportunity, do not reject a new offer right away - give it a little time to prove itself and help you feel whether you need it or not. This is a good habit, if only because the ability to make the right choice is closely related to slowness. This doesn't mean you set aside two days, lock yourself in a room, and make endless lists of pros and cons. 🙂

No, that's what you're saying quality In life, quantity is more important to you. And what you .

Flexibility

To make the right choice, it is important to be able to calmly accept. You can't cook scrambled eggs without breaking eggs! To do this, you must first invest something. To hear a yes, you must have the strength to go through a certain number of nos. Losses are inevitable.

By accepting this and not considering it “in vain,” we become truly flexible and capable of making the right choices in the most incredible circumstances of life.

Respect for what's important

The essence of being able to make good choices comes down to understanding what is important to you in life and respecting it. Pay attention to your own values. Not “for show” or to be moral - you personally need this. In order to live your life in such a way that you don’t feel sorry for parting with it or exchanging it, when the time comes, for the next one. Even if it’s good, even better – but different. Because this your life lived.

You always make the right choice themselves. Advice, opinions, views of others can help. But not by the ones who will do it behind you - It’s easier to make choices in life if you know what options are available.

The only right choice that I would like to make a priori for you is self-respect. It's hard to live when you don't respect yourself. It’s difficult to build relationships with people when you can’t treat them with respect – and how can you do otherwise when you don’t respect yourself. It’s hard to believe in someone’s good attitude towards you.

So if you don't know where to start when making any important choice, start with this: respect yourself.

And this means respecting those things that are important to you. Take the time you need to figure this out, you have the right to do so. And while you do this, others will wait without any questions.