Uncontrolled aggression in men and women, diagnosis, causes. Uncontrollable attacks of aggression and outbursts of anger in men and women: causes, methods of combating

If a man is irritated, angry for no reason, and often lashes out at others, this is already a diagnosis. And I must say, it’s not very comforting. Male aggression is the subject of study in psychology, neurology, and psychiatry, but to date no universal cure for this disease has been invented. There are too many faces, and even in the first stages, an attack of male aggression is practically indistinguishable from an ordinary, unremarkable irritable state. But it is precisely from this that neurosis can begin, which, if measures are not taken in time, very quickly transforms into an irreversible mental disorder.

First, let's figure out what aggression is? This word itself has ancient roots and translated from Latin means: “attack, attack.” This term refers to the behavior of people and animals. The former usually have manifestations of verbal (verbal) and physical aggression, which can be directed both at their own kind and at inanimate objects, objects, and phenomena. It is noteworthy that in people aggression can also manifest itself towards themselves - in the form of suicide.

Aggression tends to manifest itself in several forms at once, which at the same time are its distinctive features from other types of human behavior. Firstly, usually aggression is not actually provoked by anything real - it’s just that the one who is in its state seeks to dominate others. Secondly, it always includes an encroachment, an attack on the freedom, personal space, and objects of another person’s affection. And its third aspect is always destructive, hostile behavior during an attack.

It is noteworthy that a person who shows causeless aggression will never admit to himself the presence of deviant behavior, but will say that he was simply not in the mood, and everything has already passed.

Who gets attacked by aggression?

The family suffers first. It is the main unit of society that usually takes the most significant part of the blows from male attacks of aggression. Constant scandals, showdowns, numerous humiliations and insults, assault, violent acts are indispensable components of such an attack. Have you ever wondered what the other half of the aggressor feels during these hours and minutes? Who else, if not the woman observing a man’s attack, gets the lion’s share of all these “charms”.

And the fairer sex has no other choice but to try to mentally absorb the attacks inflicted by the aggressor, as far as is naturally possible from the point of view of personal safety, life and health. Some people remain silent in response to all their husband’s baseless remarks, some try to divert his attention and talk about positive topics, some agree with all the insults directed at them, and some simply run away from home on urgent matters that suddenly appear.

Alas, all these psychological shock absorbers have a short shelf life, and in some cases they turn out to be simply useless and will in no way be able to protect the family from male attacks of aggression.

What are the causes of aggressive behavior and are there any?

Yes, there are reasons for groundless male aggression. But they do not lie in the behavior of the victims of the aggressors, as the latter often explain their position. Attacks of aggression in men always have a certain relationship and interdependence. But in patients with mental disorders, taking into account the general clinical picture of a particular disease, they are already more clearly manifested. And for those who suffer from neuroses, they still exist in a kind of rudiment, an outline, which are usually correctly called factors influencing attacks of aggression in men.

The first and most important factor is the presence of psychoactive substances in the body of the stronger sex. Alcoholism, smoking, drinking energy drinks, drug addiction, and substance abuse are not uncommon among the male half of humanity today. So is it any wonder where various neuroses come from in men, when bad habits are the best companions of many?

Insufficiency of dopamine and serotonin metabolism, which are responsible for self-control, self-esteem, and impulsiveness of a person, also contributes to the appearance of aggression in male behavioral reactions.

Environmental factors are a special topic. Few of the representatives of the male half of humanity think that the environmental causes of almost any attack of aggression include unstable, stressful, chaotic home and work situations.

The cause of uncontrolled aggressive behavior in the male and possibly the female half of humanity is also various physiological abnormalities in the activity of vital organs and somatic diseases. For example, brain tumors or brain injuries, metabolic disorders can quite naturally become the starting point of an attack of male aggression. Post-traumatic stress disorder, if not addressed in time, can also easily lead to this result.

But knowing about the physiological predisposition of the body to deviant behavior, you can prevent the occurrence of an attack of male aggression and even, if possible, take preventive measures.

What to do with the consequences?

Among the factors influencing attacks of aggression in men, it is always necessary to highlight not only the medical, but also the social component. Namely: antisocial traits characteristic of a person, when violent actions are recognized by a representative of the stronger sex as an acceptable means to achieve certain goals.

Therefore, it is believed that prevention and treatment of the consequences of even a single attack of aggression include both medical and social components. The first is associated with contacting specialists in healthcare institutions, with pharmacological influences, the second - with the competent behavior of others who witnessed the onset of the attack.

In men's hands, even a simple household item can turn into a serious weapon of aggression. Therefore, immediately pay attention to this and keep the person who is having an attack in your field of vision, under no circumstances turning your back to him.

It can be difficult to recognize a sign of an incipient attack in male threats. Therefore, defiant words should be taken as seriously as possible, because they are an alarm bell that a male attack of aggression can occur at any moment.

It is necessary to immediately establish a safe distance between a man who is having an attack of aggression and those around him, as soon as a scandalous, conflictual, life- and health-threatening situation begins. It’s best not to start mindlessly being a hero at the moment. And those who decide to come into contact with a person who is in an excited, spontaneously aggressive state need to maintain maximum confidence and calm.

Looking for a way out of this situation

It is negative emotions that are the basis of aggressive behavior in people, and there are many reasons for such emotional states. But knowing the peculiarities of male psychology, to some extent it is possible to switch the attention of men prone to attacks of aggression to positive life moments.

Taking into account the peculiarities of motivation for male aggressive behavior, you can try to simulate situations in which negativity would be directed not into a fit of rage, but in a positive direction. But without the qualified help of a psychologist, neurologist, or psychiatrist, all these unprofessionally performed psychotherapeutic delights may not always end in calming the aggressor.

If measures are not taken in time, a single attack of aggression can, after some time, become an integral part of the male psyche, and a reversible neurotic disorder will be quickly followed by an irreversible - mental one.

Bouts of rage- this is a manifestation of an extreme form of human anger, literally bursting from the inside. Attacks of rage are marked by a destructive flow of energy, and negative emotions are characterized by a shutdown of the ability to analyze one’s actions. Unreasonable and sudden attacks cause bewilderment among others, as well as anxiety among the individual himself. To cope with your emotions, you should find out their cause, as well as master effective techniques for relieving aggressiveness.

Causes of rage attacks

There are no people who never get angry and always maintain a balanced state. Anything can get you out of a rut: an unfair boss, traffic jams, bad weather, children's pranks, etc. However, rage and rage are one thing, and uncontrollable sudden attacks of rage and anger are quite another thing.

Anger and rage usually pass without serious destructive consequences for a person, but if during sudden attacks of rage a person is able to cause pain and suffering to loved ones or those around him, then this already indicates a lack of control over his emotions. In principle, a violent manifestation of anger is considered a normal reaction of the human psyche to an external stimulus. It is much more difficult to deal with uncontrolled manifestations.

An attack of rage refers to both an emotional and physiological state. It manifests itself in increased heart rate, redness or pallor of the skin. This happens because the body receives a huge amount of energy that needs to be put somewhere.

There is an opinion that holding back negative emotions is harmful. This is not so and scientists have proven it. The release of negative emotions in the form of anger and anger towards the immediate environment is akin to a drug that gives great pleasure to the aggressor. Frequent breakdowns of a person with loved ones make him want to do this all the time. Over time, the person himself no longer notices that he is unconsciously provoking situations in which he falls into an attack. Ordinary people, noticing such a feature, begin to avoid such a person, and he, in turn, finds a society of the same unbalanced people who love outbursts of anger.

Attack of rage and anger

Negative emotions manifest themselves in the form of a destructive reaction to an obstacle (external or internal). At the same time, an obstacle often infuriates a person, and the rage itself is accompanied by an incredible desire to destroy this obstacle. An obstacle can be both inanimate and animate. The emergence of rage is associated with the appearance of anger, which angers the individual. Attempts to cope with it remain unsuccessful and anger develops into rage.

Rage occurs when a situation develops that is not satisfactory and gives the feeling that it is possible to cope with it. It grows to a certain point - a turning point, after which there is either a decline in the intensity of feelings until calm, or a sharp jump upward, which manifests itself in the form of attacks. A common, common expression is choked with anger. This is the starting point for the onset of rage.

This condition is marked by compression of the nerves and shortness of breath. Negative emotions are always accompanied by a desire for physical activity: fight, jump, run, crush, break, clench your hands into fists.

Attacks are marked by specific facial expressions:

- drooping, knitted eyebrows;

- widened eyes, focusing attention on the object of aggression;

- formation of horizontal folds on the bridge of the nose;

- expansion of the wings of the nose due to air flows and tension;

- open mouth at height when inhaling, bare teeth.

Attacks of rage have many similarities with hysteria. They are united, for example, by the fact that these extreme forms of expression of emotions, introducing the human psyche into a dangerous state, do not have organic changes.

Prolonged hysteria and fits of rage cause serious harm to health. This could be loss of consciousness, stroke, shock, heart attack, paralysis of the arms, temporary deafness, blindness.

Attacks of rage in men and women

A hormonal storm in a man’s body can provoke the manifestation of negative emotions. Excess testosterone makes a man more aggressive. This behavior is attributed to a hereditary factor that modern men inherited from the Middle Ages, when they had to defend their territory. An unreasonable outbreak of aggression in men is considered a mental problem.

Treatment and prevention of rage attacks include social and medical components. The first is associated with the competent behavior of others who witnessed the onset of this state. The second is related to contacting specialists in medical institutions.

The cause of uncontrolled violent behavior in the female half of humanity, as well as in the male half, is various physiological deviations and somatic diseases. For example, brain injuries and tumors, metabolic disorders can very well become the starting point for attacks. Post-traumatic stress disorder, if left untreated, can easily provoke the same result. However, knowing about the physiological predisposition of the female body to, it is possible to prevent the manifestations of this condition in women and, if possible, even take preventive measures.

Child's rage attacks

The physiological basis of emotions that tonic an individual’s activity is mainly the process of excitation, and the basis of such negative emotions as inhibition are processes of inhibition. In childhood, excitement has an advantage over inhibition, thereby determining the child’s emotional increased excitability.

A child in preschool age fully transmits the mood of those around him; the child is able to cry, but within a few minutes laugh. For children, rapid changes in emotions are a normal reaction. It is important for parents to remember this and not to panic in vain. Gradually, over the years, a balance of nervous processes develops, and feelings become stable and moderate. Parents should take into account that the child always tries to copy adults. And if he notices that with the help of hysteria and attacks it is possible to achieve his goals, then he will constantly use it.

How to deal with rage attacks in children? Do not create situations that are traumatic for the child’s psyche, do not have offensive, hurtful conversations in front of the baby. If there is a threat of negative emotions, smooth out difficult moments and distract the child with other topics.

If a child has frequent hysteria, which arose due to the influence of the school group, it is necessary to go to school without hesitation and find out what the reason is.

If attacks of hysteria pose a threat to the child’s health, then the issue of termination of stay in the educational institution or this class should be decided.

Treatment of rage attacks

First, it is necessary to assess the true cause of this person’s condition.

Secondly, you should learn to track a certain period of time between the onset of anger and a calm state. To calm down as quickly as possible, you should close your eyes for a while and try to abstract yourself from the outside world. All attacks are marked by rapid and shallow breathing. Therefore, in order to combat this condition, you need to master control of your breathing. By taking a deep and slow breath you can calm down. In the future, when a person feels the approach of negative emotions, it is necessary to go to the mirror and observe which facial muscles are tense. In a state of calm, you should master the skills to control your facial muscles - relax and also tense. When the next outburst of anger and anger occurs, you should relax your facial muscles.

Thirdly, it is necessary to avoid the company of people who provoke negative emotions.

Fourthly, if attacks are caused by upbringing, then you should avoid irritating situations, be sure to avoid alcohol, think about pleasant things, spend more time in nature, always say good things, act fairly, take infusions of soothing herbs (infusions of hawthorn, valerian, chamomile, peppermint).

It is recommended to eliminate attacks of rage for no reason by switching attention to something distracting and pleasant, for example, a person is mentally transported to those places where he can be replenished with positive energy, and the conversation with the interlocutor is transferred to neutral topics.

Physical activity (jogging, abdominal exercises) is effective in relieving negative emotions. If there is an urgent need to throw out rage, you need to do this while alone. You should break something, break it, work with a hammer, beat a pillow. Great importance should be given to proper nutrition, excluding spicy foods and alcohol, as they provoke aggression. If the attacks continue and become uncontrollable, you should consult a specialist.

Often, relatives of a patient are interested in which doctor to contact if they are overcome by attacks of rage, causing suffering to everyone? Often, a suffering person considers himself a normal person and denies the offered help from his family. In this case, you should try not to bring your loved one to a state of rage and anger. Knowing that he has such a characteristic as sudden temper, rage, anger, give in to him, restraining yourself.

Hello. I have mental problems. And for a long time now. Quarrel, screaming, breakdown, anger, hatred, things fly around the apartment, crying, howling, and so on once or twice a month. This has been the case for 12 years with both my first husband and my second... Unfortunately, it continues. She tried to commit suicide several times. Etc. and nothing makes me happy, hopelessness and no faith in anything. Even when I’m writing this letter at the moment, I can’t believe that something will work out, that something will help me. There is no happiness in anything. I'm pregnant now. At 5 months. I feel bad. I cry every day. I can’t even put myself in order for the sake of my child. I read trainings, articles, etc. on the Internet. but somehow none of this has any effect on me.

Hi people! I often have attacks of almost uncontrollable aggression, my vision becomes cloudy, I have little awareness of what I’m doing, if I lose my temper I brutally beat the person who provoked me, what is this?

Hello. Lately my aggression has become more frequent! Previously, when something fell, broke, or something went wrong, I destroyed everything that was nearby! I was calm for a while. For 2 years, I behaved calmly, but lately I have been having unrealistic breakdowns! I live with a guy and a cat. I have been depressed for a month now and have constant hysterics. I can cry all night. As soon as the cat climbs somewhere where I don’t allow it, I immediately get angry... I can’t stop, I just feel like I’m going to kill. Tell me, maybe I’m already sick in the head? Or should I see a psychologist?

• Hello, Anya. Due to regular tears, mental health suffers significantly, since crying is accompanied by aggression, bad mood, irritability and even drowsiness. In this case, examination and treatment, both medicinal and psychological, are required. We recommend solving the problem of tearfulness and breakdowns with a psychotherapist and endocrinologist. Tearfulness can be caused by an overactive thyroid gland. The cause of frequent tears may be hyperfunction of the organ, so it is worth being examined by an endocrinologist.

Hello, I was very angry with my mother when we quarreled, anger and hatred appeared, I pretended to be calm, controlled myself, then I went to meditate, but I couldn’t get rid of these emotions, although I meditated for 20 minutes, I still wanted to express everything, the anger only grew in me, then she made another claim to me and I lost it, just pure rage, I couldn’t stop, I said EVERYTHING I thought, I wanted to yell, smash and beat, then I cried and calmed down a little, and she She started again and I just couldn’t stand it anymore and hit her. And after that she started crying, and I calmed down and listened to her about what a monster I was, and felt calm, despite everything she said about me. In short, this is terrible, I don’t know why I couldn’t relax during meditation, and in general it’s better that it doesn’t come to this, although it instantly calms me down, but there are other effective ways that don’t cause harm to anyone. Next time I'll try.

Good afternoon. My name is Alena, and I am an aggressive person. Aggression occurs when something doesn’t go the way I want it to. For example: when the phone doesn’t do what I need (oh, and it gets to him), I have a desire to break it, sometimes, in order to throw out energy, I break something less valuable, most often pencils. Lets go immediately, especially if you do not return to the source of aggression. I used to lose my temper with my child until I sat down and thought through the most common situations that cause aggression. I said several times that the child was not intentionally making me angry, and tried to put myself in his shoes; there were no problems with worked-out situations, but oh, those inanimate objects. What else can be done during such attacks of rage, I can’t restrain myself. And most importantly, what model of aggression management should we teach a child?

Hello! I have a problem, I feel constant inner anger, and as soon as I find a reason (for example, the child does not listen, etc.) I immediately splash it out. I can't control it anymore. I’m very worried about my son, because he feels me, and most importantly, I scold him, I scream a lot. I don’t want this myself. It all started after breaking up with my husband; there was wild hatred towards him. I used to be a kind, forgiving and understanding person, but now I myself am hurt by this anger. Tell me who to contact, I don’t want the child to see me like this (I start at half a turn).

• You know, I have the same feeling, but only for my 7-year-old daughter. I try to restrain myself, but then I suddenly find some reason and I no longer look like myself. My daughter is afraid of me and doesn’t know what to expect from me. It’s as if the soul is made of stone inside. This happened after an abortion, which I had when my daughter was 3 years old. I understand that it is not her fault. And he doesn’t even know that I did it. But I can’t help it. Abortion is a sore subject for me.

  • Well, of course, Tatyana, you killed your daughter’s sister or brother. Do you understand how crazy this sounds and what action you committed? Repent, ask for forgiveness from your daughter and the little one you did not allow to be born, do good deeds for those in need. It is very difficult, but it is possible to atone for your guilt. 4 years have passed and you haven’t let go. Ask God to forgive you and guide you on the path of repentance. I know what I'm writing.

    • There is no god. And in such cases, faith will not help. Abortion is not murder. The fetus is not a person or a person. These are deeply psychological problems. You should consult a psychologist about this

Hello! In a very short period of time, breakdowns occurred in which I raised my hand against a loved one. I don’t understand what was happening and I don’t even remember how I hit him, but there was no reason for these outbreaks. I don’t know what to do, please advise.

• • I did an ultrasound of the thyroid gland. I have similar symptoms. although it doesn’t come to the point of assault (yet), but the pictures in my head are scary... how else can I check it? Should I take some hormones? I’m still afraid to go to the doctor with this problem, although I understand that this is the solution. self-flagellation takes place. I do a lot of things that I understand what harms me (smoking, eating everything, drinking... although I once ran 10-15 km...). It’s like I’m attacking myself for my aggressiveness…. although, in fact, I smell myself normally... bullshit, eat, drink... isn’t that bad? Besides, I don’t need it, I have enough... but there are no goals in life... yes, yes, there are...

I have been living with a man for almost 20 years. They were once close, but now they are just like relatives. It so happened that there is no money to travel, we have to live together, at least in different rooms. Of these years, the first 2 years were normal, then he began to detect outbursts of unmotivated rage. Then they discovered lung cancer, and many years later a brain tumor. In subsequent years, all income goes towards treatment. And loans for treatment. There is no money for everything else. If things had turned out differently, my character would probably have been more cheerful. If it weren’t for the illness, I probably would have just left, but now I’m pulling the burden or bearing the cross, depending on the degree of positivity in my outlook on the situation. Sometimes it is not possible to extinguish depression associated with constant stress, and it, in turn, can cause another outburst of anger from a friend, after which, with a high probability, money will again be needed for chemistry and radiation. All I need is a lot of money to pay off loans and treatment. And have a good rest.

Good afternoon. I absolutely cannot control my anger. I can quarrel with a person over a trifle. I can react very angrily to the comments of people close to me, I start screaming and crying, I want to hit and break everything around me, and sometimes I do just that. I wish death to the one who offended me and I myself want to die in those moments. I'm angry why I was even born. But after five minutes everything passes, all that remains is weakness and sadness in the soul. It also always seems that I am right and other people have incorrect, limited thinking and that everyone envy me. I don’t listen to people’s opinions, I don’t care about public opinion. I watch movies and always cry at any sad scene. Of the films, I am only interested in science fiction, horror and thrillers. Sometimes I imagine that my loved ones suddenly died, and I also start crying, although my loved ones, thank God, are alive and well. I am very interested in maniacs, I constantly read about them on the Internet.
What happened with me?

• Good afternoon, Polina. In order to understand yourself, you should contact a professional psychologist in person who will conduct psychodiagnostics.

  If you believe in God, go to church for confession and communion. All will pass! You will become completely different. Calm, balanced and loving people. May God give you health of soul and body)))

  • Well, you take communion, so what? What will this communion give you? Will an alcoholic go to communion and cleanse his sins? Will the murderer take communion and cleanse his sins? Alien! If you read the Bible, you should know that Christ's disciples and other people prayed to God, but did not take communion. Read the Bible, and do not speak heresy to other people who do not know God, the Lord sees you very well from heaven. You need to pray to God, not to the one on the cross, and not to the Virgin Mary, and not to Saint Peter. TO GOD. He died for you and your sins, and bore the cross for others. Glory to Him, Forever and ever, My heavenly father.

Good day,
I am fully aware of my problem and cannot understand how to solve it. I have very aggressive attacks, most of the time I get irritated by the people around me. The last time my colleague infuriated me, she took my book and began to write some notes in it, knowing that I would not approve of it, this made me very angry because she encroached on my thing, which I treat with care, and in addition, she herself yells . For this I was ready to tear her apart like a rag. There are many such cases at work, when someone leaves something on my desk or dirt, it blows my mind. I understand that this is not normal and I need to work on myself, but at such moments I am just a beast. I tried to do yoga, read a lot of literature about the fact that at the energetic level it is an imbalance of energy, etc... and much more and nothing helps. In general, I was already really sad because of this. I don’t know how to deal with this, I’ve had this since childhood.

Hello, I have real, really scary outbursts of anger..
I don't just say hurtful words or yell, which is what some people here worry about. It’s just that at one absolutely any moment I start to feel dizzy so much, as if I’m losing consciousness, my whole body is filled with heat, I start shaking, everything is white before my eyes, I can’t see anything, there’s only a ringing in my ears, and at such moments if there is a person nearby, I I’ll definitely beat him up, and not just get angry, and he won’t be able to resist, I’m far from athletic myself, but in these seconds it’s as if incredible strength appears (according to others, I don’t remember anything after the attacks), and if there’s no one around, I’ll harm myself .
What to do?.. help

• Good afternoon, Valeria! Talk to the priest and try to do everything he advises. You don’t need to take any pills - but the result will be accurate. I read a lot about this.

  • the person is sick and needs treatment. This is exactly the same disease as a fracture. Do you also send someone with a fracture to a priest?
    Faith is always needed unconditionally. but a person must come to this himself and not on a forum. What is needed here is treatment, not teaching how to live.

• Yana, you got me with your messages to the church and God. There must be faith, but it will not cure, now thank God (here!) there are no problems in medicine and go to the doctor, you need to know your diagnosis, and not hang around behind a prayer book and hide from the truth, delaying it.

Unreasonable outbursts of rage occur. For example: I was reading a book, a familiar person just walked past me, didn’t even say anything, just walked by and drank water (silently), and I was ready to tear and throw, and only thanks to my secrecy and desire to hide absolutely any information about me, even the most insignificant, I was able to restrain myself; although if I am alone in the whole room during such cases, I can hit myself on the head, but I still try to restrain myself. Also, after particularly strong attacks, my heart begins to ache (once, due to very severe pain, I could not take a deep breath, I was scared to death).
What happened with me? I hope it’s nothing serious, I haven’t even finished school.

Hello. My friend has angry outbursts. At one point he attacked me too. I’ve known for a long time that he has it, and outbursts happen, but not on me, since I’m his best friend, well, that’s what I thought until that moment. I dealt with him and calmed him down. He constantly switches off, sometimes he starts to twitch, his whole body twitches, after which he switches off. But that’s not all, after that he comes to his senses again and again he’s all furious. At that moment he attacked me too, I couldn’t beat him (my friend after all), after he passed out I left because I couldn’t have restrained myself. Please advise what I should do next, what if he gets sick again? Of course, I am a reserved person, but I will not allow myself to be beaten. Advise how to convey to the person so that he himself takes measures to heal. Friendship since childhood is crumbling...

• Hello Mr.Di.
  “Advise how to convey to the person that he himself takes measures to heal” - Film a friend in moments of blackout and rage on the phone. When your friend is adequate, show the video and delete the video after that.

  This is the place in Dur House. Such a person must be isolated from society because he is dangerous. Take a video, and at the next outburst of anger, call an ambulance. Otherwise, psychosis will take over his body. Muslims are often helped by turning to the Mufti; they treat in an ancient absolutely painless way, singing lines from the holy book in the ear; if a person begins to grimace, tremble, scream, speak in a different voice or in a different language, then the Mufti will be able to heal him. There are 2 options, either to the Madhouse to treat the body, or to the Mufti to treat the soul.

  • How you messed up with your religion, it is of no use, a psychologist and self-control are your companions at the time of treatment... and leave fairy tales about demons for children at night... 21st century and you still believe in Hollywood stupidity!

    • Dear Alexander! I am a Protestant pastor and have dealt with demon-possessed people several times. No one could help them, neither doctors nor psychologists, but Christ helped. This is true! Anger and aggression can have different reasons, both psychological and physiological, as well as spiritual. When psychologists are powerless, you need to go to a priest.

      • It’s difficult to find a good psychologist in the CIS countries, that’s the real problem. you, my friend, are not a priest of the Moscow Patriarchate, are you? A Protestant is a Westerner, so you understand people well. If only he had a Western psychologist, everything would be ok.

Hello. For a long time I have been noticing fits of rage. When the situation gets out of control, it starts to overwhelm me. I get lost and start arguing with someone who either provoked some situation or makes it so that everything collapses and when I reach a certain boiling point, it’s as if I turn off and I start beating. How I can and where I can, I absolutely cannot control it. This provokes the provocateur and we start a full-scale fight. And I don't want this. At first I try to get around everything peacefully, but they don’t want to listen to me and I can’t leave either. I don't have the opportunity to see a doctor for some reason. Can you recommend literature or anything that might help? I no longer have the strength for these outbursts. I am constantly tired and feel like a squeezed lemon. Thank you in advance.

• • and if everything is the same, but I don’t start hitting. but I think I really want it. and this often happens: I’m at home, no one is there. I start to replay what was or could be (as if I was provoking myself. I know people’s looks and imagine how they provoke me and I hit them)…

    • Hello, Sanya. There are non-drug ways to relieve aggression - throwing paper snowballs into a basket placed on the floor; hit a punching bag or at least a pillow, carry a notepad with you and, at the slightest irritation, start tearing its paper into small pieces. This will help you quickly calm down, and others will not notice your irritation or anger.
      Be careful when drinking alcoholic beverages - under the influence of alcohol, aggressive behavior may appear that is uncharacteristic for a person in a sober state.

Good afternoon. Help me understand what's wrong with me. Lately there have been outbursts of rage. I control my emotions at work, but I can’t at home. I start yelling at the child over every nonsense, and I might hit him. After such outbursts I can neither talk nor look at anyone. I am really tired.

Thanks a lot! I will definitely take your advice, he sometimes yells so much that it is impossible to conduct a dialogue... He has no sex life, due to the fact that he believes that he has a small male organ. Can a lack of sexual activity cause this behavior in a man?

Hello. Various little things irritate me, everything makes me start screaming and swearing. Somewhere deep down I understand that I need to stop, I can’t until I scream enough... then I walk without any emotions at all. I am very afraid for my little child, she gets it too. I feel very bad about this, but I can’t do anything on my own, I promise myself that I will restrain myself, but everything is the same again. Tell me which doctor to see...

Hello! My friend complains all the time that he is in constant tension, any smallest negative situation makes him anxious and causes aggression, he swears at everyone, considers them guilty, and then turns on me and finds fault with words and remembers old grievances, wants me more painfully prick with a word so that I will be offended by him. And she left. And then he begins to repent and apologize for his words.. And this repeats with some frequency.. What should I do?

• • • Irina, when a young man “wants to prick me more painfully with a word so that I will be offended by him. And she left. And then he begins to repent and apologize for his words” - Don’t be offended, take his words as an opportunity to speak out, don’t take the words personally. After all, if you are offended, it means that the guy’s goal is achieved, and your self-esteem begins to fall, since your pride is hurt. Know how to stop a guy during unpleasant conversations, say: “stop, stop, you’re wrong, I don’t think so.”
      The main thing is to understand for yourself that your boyfriend has the right to think as he pleases. This is his subjective opinion. Your task is to be able to withstand this confrontation with dignity and learn to be a mature and self-sufficient person. After all, the fact that you are offended and react painfully is already your personal problem.

Good afternoon, I really need advice on how to overcome outbursts of rage and anger that arise from jealousy. The jealousy is unreasonable, I cheat a lot, there is a fear that they will betray me. I don't know what to do, my jealousy is ruining my relationships and my nervous system.

• Hello Christina.
  First you need to understand the reasons for jealousy. There is no such thing as unreasonable jealousy. “there is a fear that they will betray you.” - This is the reason. Fear is often present with low self-esteem, suspiciousness, and lack of self-confidence.
  Also, the cause of jealousy is a feeling of lack of love, attention, sympathy, respect from a valued person, as well as a loved one.
  This feeling has the same nature as envy. Jealousy can develop in any person, since there is always someone smarter, stronger, more beautiful. Therefore, there is no point in being jealous, because you can forever lose your loved one and your peace of mind.
  It is important to discover this true reason; understanding what is happening will help determine how to get rid of jealousy and control yourself in moments of rage.
  On our part, we recommend that you realize that love must be supported with warm, gentle words, and not with furious and zealous speech, which only extinguishes the fire of love. Your man does not owe you anything and he will be with you exactly as long as he feels good with you. If outbursts of rage and anger continue, he will disappear from your life and your fears will come true.

Hello, my stepmother is 44 and has rage attacks.
Everything is fine, but here, for no reason at all, he can lose his temper, start being rude, and swear. After all this, at first she apologized, saying she didn’t know what came over her. But lately he hasn’t even apologized. I told her to go to a psychiatrist, to which she categorically refuses. Please advise whom to contact.

• Hello Olga. You can seek help from a neurologist who will prescribe an examination. It is also advisable to consult an endocrinologist.

Hello! After my child and I returned from the hospital (we were away for 10 days), I noticed problems in my husband’s behavior. He may start yelling out of nowhere, swearing, and being rude. After about 15 minutes he cools down and apologizes. He says he doesn’t understand what came over him. Today he beat me for trying to wake him up for work...
What specialist can I contact?

Hello, at my work my immediate boss is behaving very strangely. He has outbursts of aggression, the last time he did this, he started yelling, his face turned red, his eyes bulged, and he started kicking my table. He left the office for a while, and then came in, as if nothing had happened, his face was calm, he began to apologize, began to say that he was ashamed of his behavior, that he himself did not understand what had happened and what is now happened. Please write what is happening to him and what should I do, because I am always in the same office with him and I am very scared when this happens to him, there are times when it seems to me that he can use his hands. I'm really looking forward to your answer. Thank you in advance.

• Hello, Dina. To understand what is happening with the boss, it is necessary to conduct psychodiagnostics to identify the person’s psychotype.
  A person’s psychotype is usually hidden behind a social mask and is usually clearly manifested in stressful, critical and unusual situations.
  We recommend that if your boss is aggressive, you try not to contact him.

Good afternoon My colleague, in my opinion, chose me as a victim. Frequent unjustified attacks of aggression, at such moments he carries complete nonsense, and gets pleasure from it. What should my behavior be in such a situation? 8 years ago she spent 4 months on sick leave with a psychiatrist.

• Hello, Galina. Inform your superiors about the current situation, ask for advice and, if possible, given the incompatibility of characters, protect you from the need to communicate with such a colleague.
  You need to have support on your side, so an adequate leader, imbued with the situation, will help resolve it safely for you.

Attacks of aggression, mainly not only because of relatives. I am a person who loves loneliness, but at this stage of life this is impossible... aggression has been manifested for as long as I can remember, namely, it is accompanied, for example, by rash actions, fast and deep breathing, then numbness primarily of the face, arms and legs, and in At the end there is a strong heartbeat and a feeling that I might lose consciousness...
Before this, I had hallucinations twice in my life, one with sound, the second with the loss of a body tool, let’s say... I don’t know if it’s worth seeing a doctor because, as always, they won’t find anything... my personal thoughts

• Hello, Ruslan. Attacks of aggression and tachycardia can be the cause of hormonal imbalances in the body.
  “I don’t know if I should see a doctor because, as always, they won’t find anything” - You have already listed enough symptoms in your message to see a doctor. We recommend that you consult a cardiologist.

Twice in my life I noticed attacks of anger, malice and aggression... First, a year before the stroke, it started with my dad. The attacks were completely uncontrollable, he was going crazy. Moreover, at these moments he behaved in a way that was completely unusual for him. Then, a year before the cancer diagnosis, my husband began to experience these attacks. It got to the point that when, 2 months before his death, while lying in the hospital and already weakened, he managed to hit me so hard that I flew off and crashed against the wall... Where did the strength come from... Of course, I couldn’t be offended and leave, but remembering my dad, I realized, which is coming soon... So you don’t need to see a neuropsychiatrist, but just go to the doctors for a full examination. The body is screaming about something...

Hello, I've been noticing some inappropriate behavior lately. At the slightest quarrel, I lash out at my family and boyfriend, and at the same time, it’s not just screaming, but on my part it’s real aggression and hysteria at the same time, I yell so much that it even blocks my ears. Please help me, advise me which doctor I should see, what to drink. I’m just getting scared myself, so that in this state I don’t mess things up, so to speak.

Hello. I have a condition and I can’t cope with it, I constantly yell at the child, get angry, scream. I have severe rage and aggression. Help me where to turn. I really want to become calm.

• Special calming tea helps me a lot. Look for one like this. I drink it every day. Without drinking for 2 days I’m just going wild. Sometimes children even do this, but it’s much easier to control yourself. The article lists some herbs.

Hello, I got together with a man 7 years ago. At that time I had 3 daughters, whom, it seemed to me, he fell in love. We signed. Then 2 more babies were born. His relatives never accepted me or my daughters. His mother died 3 years ago. He's been very irritable lately. He raises his voice at his daughters over every little thing. Sometimes it seems to me that he is ready to kill them, such is the anger on his face. There have been outbursts of anger before, but they were very rare and there was always a logical explanation. Divorce won't help. We live in the village. I have nowhere to go, I'm an orphan. Help, I'm afraid for the children.

Hello. I lived with a woman for over a year. After this time, we finally separated. Throughout our life together, and even now I still have feelings of love for her. From the very beginning, her relationship with me was harsh with irritation about all sorts of little things (dressed wrong, spilled crumbs on the floor, said the wrong thing, etc.), and with my loved ones it began with irritability about their existence (my mother sat down with us into the car, said hello, said something about the things in the back seat, which I then listened to - “if I don’t like it, let him stomp on foot!!!, etc.). Then, a month later, an attempt to jointly rearrange the furniture in the apartment ended with obscene language addressed to me, that I was stupid and almost a stupid animal. I wanted to break up, but I persuaded her not to leave her with the motivation that she couldn’t live without me. Then an unexpected pregnancy. What started here, God forbid. Any of my actions caused a lot of anger in her, because I said something wrong or said it as a joke. She forced me to go to my parents, whom I hated because they lived in their own world (my parents are 75 years old and already very ill). After a week, she asked to come back. I fulfilled this request because I loved it. It didn't end there. At 13 weeks, fetal pathology was discovered and an abortion had to be performed for medical reasons “cito”. She accused my parents of being to blame and not wanting this child to be born. And then our whole life was accompanied by such unexpected statements that I don’t feel sorry for her, I offend her, I do everything wrong, etc. Ultimately, she kicked me out to my Father’s house. Even after that, I continued my relationship with her and life to the fullest, only we no longer went to bed together and didn’t get up together. Throughout the entire relationship, I listened to her negativity about how it was no longer acceptable to live like this, because... Her 15-year-old son arrived and it became cramped for us to live in a 1-room apartment, although I didn’t feel it. The last straw was a call from my sister and parents, in front of whose eyes all this happened. A sea of ​​anger and rage was unleashed, accompanied by obscene language directed at them. Please tell me what it could be? The illness of my beloved, whom I still love. After all, I did everything to live like a human being.
Sincerely, Vladimir.

• Hello, Vladimir. There is no need to blame yourself for what happened; there were no real and sincere feelings on your woman’s part. She was completely dissatisfied with the relationship that she had with you, so she could not control herself, and she did not try, the lack of a culture of upbringing is obvious from what you described.

  • There may be no need to blame yourself, but every person must take responsibility for what is happening in his life. If there is such a woman in his life, then he is the kind of man who wants to be seen as more sensitive and caring, given her complaints about his callousness. Judging by the large number of complaints against a woman, a man is infantile, avoids responsibility, “I have nothing to do with it all”... He becomes a follower. Until he takes responsibility, changes, takes the position of a giver... love for the family, order, care, responsibility... You won’t see a good family like your ears.

Your entire comment is permeated with the thought that I’m all so good, but the woman is hysterical. Life does not connect random people, and the fact that after such a series of absolutely bright and unambiguous events in your personal life you still do not see the log in your eye speaks of your certain callousness, simplicity and unwillingness to take responsibility for what is happening. If a person behaves correctly and promptly solves the problems that come from life, then he lives in a world close to an ideal one. It's possible. The longer you go away from solving your problems, the stronger, more often, more persistently and more painfully for you life will stubbornly offer them to you. Until you decide. Therefore, if you are unhappy with your personal relationships, relationships with your parents, or the presence of other problems in your life, the first thing you can do for yourself is think... What is this person teaching me? And this one? What should I understand??.. Second: think about how I can help this person?.. Don’t try to convince anyone with words. Speak mentally to his soul. Talk to your soul. Talk to yourself alone. Ask serious questions. For yourself. Be self-critical. And you will hear the answers. Take responsibility for your life and for your loved ones. Be an example of a man. And your life will begin to change for the better. Good luck)

We live in Kyiv. Father is 65 years old. Very irritable and short-tempered with relatives. He is rude to his own mother, who is already 85, which has never happened before. Constant squabbles with my wife after 23 years of marriage recently led to divorce. Perhaps this happens due to unfulfilled professional expectations and some internal fears. How can this behavior be diagnosed? Can this be cured with the help of a psychotherapist?

• Hello Andrei. Your father’s irritability and temper may be both a character trait and a symptom of a disease, or your personal assumptions may also be the cause of this behavior.
  Irritability can also be caused by both internal and external problems.
  Internal – depression, neurasthenia, anxiety disorder, sleep disorders, alcoholism, chronic fatigue, lack of self-realization, imbalance of brain functions, etc.
  External are factors from the external environment, for example, sudden rain or a negative action of a person.
  Psychological, physiological and genetic factors that provoke this negative behavior are also noted, so it is impossible to establish a diagnosis remotely. Seek help from a psychotherapist.

I have a sister, she is 11 years younger than me, she is kind, cheerful, and not greedy. Sometimes I start yelling at her for no reason. She is only 10 years old and I don’t want her to grow up like me. Tell me something else, because during the actual attack of rage you cannot think about breathing or facial expressions, you cannot think about anything except that you are angry. And could these fits of rage be related to the fact that I have epilepsy? In general, I get very nervous and have panic attacks. What does this have to do with? Because I have epilepsy? Or because the hormones have not yet calmed down at 21? Or is it psychology and all because I have no friends and I don’t go anywhere except home and work, and at home I just lock myself in my room and go into the world of books or films? Looks like I have serious problems.

• Sasha, lack of self-control, self-control and a sense of impunity allows you to shout at your sister. You won’t allow yourself to shout at people in a store or on the street for no reason, will you?
  Attacks of rage may be due to the fact that you are nervous, tense, have many problems, complexes, and unfulfilled desires.
  We recommend that you improve your relationships with the outside world: meet girls and guys, don’t shy away from social contacts, use social networks first.
  It is also necessary to internally mentally tune yourself to remain calm in any situation and not bring your state to fits of rage. Everything depends on you.

  Sasha, ask questions to your soul when you are alone, read books that will help you find answers to your questions. Good specialists often charge too much for their services and are not always sincerely interested in helping you. Unfortunately. You shouldn't rely on anyone. But you can completely help yourself. Awareness of the problem is already 80% of its solution. Read, develop, there is now a lot of available information on self-development, do yoga, it very harmonizes the soul and body, just find a video on YouTube that you like and do it at random, then you will get involved and figure it out. Douse yourself with cold water in the morning after a warm shower, this will strengthen your body and will. And everything will work out) the one who walks will master the road :)

Suppose I am able to do no harm to others during an attack, but I am worried that these attacks cause harm to myself. Is holding back a solution to a problem or is it still a way to hide it? And is there a way to find out whether rage is hormonal or not?

• Olsha, you understand everything correctly, restraining yourself during attacks of rage is not a solution to the problem, but it would still be better to do so and extinguish the self-developing feeling of rage by developing self-control.
  Rage is produced in the adrenal glands, the hormone norepinephrine is responsible for it. The production of norepinephrine occurs when a person finds himself in a stressful situation, visually this is manifested in the rosy cheeks. If attacks cause inconvenience, then you should direct your rage to useful things: washing, cleaning, doing fitness and other sports, or neutralize them with meditation and yoga.

Such a person will not go to a psychotherapist himself. Nobody gets into an attack. He brings himself. Looking for any excuse. These attacks lead to the question: “Will I or our children remain crippled?” Question: How can I force him to undergo treatment? He doesn't listen to anyone!

• Galina, it is necessary to solve the problem, taking into account his consent. If a man does not want to change and accept help, then you should assess the situation from the point of view of the safety of your family, since your fears are justified.
  It often happens that the only way out of this situation is divorce. Tell him this when he is calm. Perhaps this will affect him and, out of fear of losing his family, he will think about it and accept the help of a specialist. You can invite him to visit a family psychologist together.

  • He didn't think about anything. The feeling that the irritant is me. She left, very far. I'm fine. The children have grown up. My husband and I divorced. But a lot of things in his life don’t work out and, as before, he blames everyone around him for his problems. And the fits of rage spread to the children. Which is what worries me. And I can’t take him to any psychologists. He doesn't listen to anyone.

Aggression does not arise out of nowhere. Often it is interpersonal conflicts that are the cause of aggression. Provocation is the most common factor in outbreaks of aggression.

Aggression can arise even from the mere thought that another person has hostile intentions, regardless of whether there was a real reason for this or not.

Social causes of aggression

Among social reasons, one of the serious reasons for aggression are observers and instigators. Many people willingly obey when they are asked to publicly punish another person, even if the commands are given by persons who are not in authority. Bystanders have a significant influence on aggression if the aggressor thinks that his actions will be approved.

Carrying a weapon can manifest itself not only as a means of protection, but also as a stimulus to aggression.
The media and the demonstration of scenes of violence in the media also serve as a reason and a kind of “call” for violence.

External environment as a cause of aggression

High air temperatures increase the likelihood of irritation and aggressive behavior.

Other environmental influences on aggression include noise and crowding. In addition, in a polluted environment, such as excessive cigarette smoke or foul odors, aggressive reactions are also increased.

Personal qualities and innate tendency to aggression

Among the psychological characteristics that can provoke aggressive behavior are:

• fear of public disapproval;

• irritability;

• tendency to see hostility in others;

• tendency to feel shame rather than guilt in many situations.

Among people prone to aggression, there are often those who are committed to various prejudices, for example, racial prejudices.

Female and male aggression

There are some differences between men and women in the expression of aggression. Women view aggression more as a way to express anger and relieve stress due to the release of aggressive energy.

Men view aggression as a certain model of behavior that they resort to in order to obtain some kind of social or material reward.

Often aggression and irritability in women manifests itself during the menstrual cycle, the so-called premenstrual syndrome. Also, the cause of attacks of aggression in women can be hormonal changes in the body, during the period before and after childbirth, menopause, or taking hormonal medications.

Attacks of aggression in men can also be associated with changes in hormonal levels, for example, with an excess of the male hormone - testosterone, or during the period of male menopause - andropause.

In addition to hormonal causes of aggression in men and women, there are a number of psychological problems, including various addictions - alcoholism, drug addiction and nicotine addiction. It is known that regular use of harmful substances has a destructive effect on the human psyche.

Attacks of aggression Occur periodically in many people. This is facilitated by critical situations, quarrels, stress, and nervous tension. However, if outbursts of anger arise without a good reason and are repeated regularly, becoming uncontrollable, then this is a reason to think about the reasons for the occurrence of such behavior. Often, the closest and dearest people, as well as the aggressor himself, suffer from this condition.

Causes of attacks of aggression

The causes of aggressive behavior are a person’s internal problems, which include an increased, constant sense of responsibility, fatigue, irritability, pain, anger, and self-doubt. All of the above accumulated, looking for a way out in the form of outbursts of anger.

The cause of attacks of aggression in a person is also a high pace of life, unbearable stress, insufficient rest, personal and professional failures, and futility of expectations. Other individuals experience bouts of aggression if something does not happen as they expected. Often it is very difficult for such people to control aggressiveness and it even comes to assault. If you do not pay attention to this problem for a long time, psychological problems will arise that will affect personal relationships.

Attacks of aggression in women can indicate serious problems (endocrine and vascular diseases, epileptic activity, taking hormonal drugs, birth injuries and traumatic brain injuries). To find out, you should conduct a thorough diagnosis and then begin treatment.

Uncontrollable attacks of aggression

Irritability and anger are a natural reaction of the body to the environment, but if uncontrolled attacks of aggression occur, they can become dangerous for society. The aggressor, having splashed out claims, reproaches, and insults on those around him, then strongly repents and regrets, feeling empty and depressed, feeling an unpleasant aftertaste in his soul. Feelings of regret and guilt do not last long, so the next time the situation repeats itself. There are also cases of assault. Emerging attacks of aggression in a person can destroy a family, since the person suffering from uncontrollable attacks of aggression behaves inappropriately.

Uncontrolled attacks of aggression at work can lead to dismissal, and as a result, other psychosomatic diseases.

Uncontrollable attacks of aggression in some people occur due to sudden pain and fatigue.

Attacks of aggression in men

Many experts argue that long-term abstinence contributes to physiological disorders in the body of men, leading to anger and attacks of aggression. Male physiological disorders manifest themselves in erectile dysfunction, as well as premature ejaculation. Before the age of 30, this is all easily restored; after 40, it requires long-term treatment, and after 50, treatment is ineffective.

Attacks of aggression in men occur due to poor upbringing, heredity and personality disorder. Treatment includes early recognition of psychopaths and neutralization of their influence.

How can a woman recognize a psychopath? A psychopath is characterized by a clear expression of emotional reactions, which manifest themselves in incontinence, addiction to alcohol, and a tendency to aggression. The main features of psychopathy are extreme irritability, excitability, explosiveness and anger. You can have a good time with a psychopathic man, but you will have to pay for it. A psychopath will deceive a woman with a smile on his face and terrify her with just one look. And when a woman ceases to interest him, the psychopath will devastate her and deprive her of peace of mind, as well as self-esteem, for a long time. The woman will turn sad and will think for a long time where she made a mistake. After such communication, a woman needs rehabilitation with a psychologist to restore her mental strength. If you have been assaulted, then in this case you should think about your safety: parting with such a man.

Attacks of aggression in women

Uncontrollable attacks of aggression in women often occur for a reason. The mother fails to adapt to new circumstances in the form of the arrival of a new family member - a baby, who turns the relationship in a couple into a “triad”.

Often there are attacks of aggression in women who have shouldered household life, as well as raising children, on their fragile shoulders. If a woman does not keep up with household chores, and the whims of her child cause her attacks of aggression, it is necessary to attract help from loved ones (husband, older children, parents and grandparents). Let them help you: take care of cleaning, ironing shirts, taking care of animals, shopping, playing with children. The most important thing is to restore the woman’s previous emotional balance. Until a woman’s nervous tension is released, uncontrollable attacks of aggression will not end.

Attacks of aggression in women are relieved by transforming tension into something else. Sports, hobbies, or something relaxing and calming (yoga or stretching) help with this. Dancing will bring quite a lot of positive emotions, which will relax and strengthen a woman’s nervous system. It is important to pay attention to your diet, give up cigarettes, coffee, energy drinks and alcoholic drinks.

Attacks of aggression in women occur if a woman is left without male attention, since this negatively affects the nervous system and leads to depression and neuroses, which can turn into hysteria and attacks of aggression. Long-term abstinence in women leads to decreased libido or frigidity. Sexual dissatisfaction leads to a sharp decline in work activity and uncontrollable attacks of aggression. This is especially clearly expressed during abstinence in women. It has been established that those women who do not have regular intimate relationships look older than their peers who have regular sexual relations.

Attacks of aggression in a child

Often, parents of small children are faced with the following problem: the child swings at people close to him, hits them in the face, pinches them, spits, and uses swear words. You cannot take this behavior of a child calmly. If this kind of situation tends to recur, then parents need to analyze at what moments the child’s attacks of aggression appear, put themselves in the child’s place, and figure out what causes such outbursts of anger.

Attacks of aggression in a child almost always occur for external reasons: family troubles, lack of what they want, deprivation of something, experimentation on adults.

Attacks of aggression in a one-year-old child manifest themselves in the form of bites from an adult or peer. For babies, bites are a way of learning about the world around them. Some one-year-old children resort to biting when they cannot achieve their goal because they cannot express their desires. The bite is an attempt to assert one’s rights, as well as an expression of one’s experience or failure. Some children bite when threatened. Babies also bite out of the need for self-defense, since they cannot cope with the situation on their own. There are babies who bite to demonstrate their strength. This is what kids do who strive for power over others. Sometimes bites can also be caused by neurological reasons. When you understand what causes your child’s negative behavior, it will be easier for you to help him cope with himself and teach him positive techniques for resolving conflict situations.

How to deal with child aggression? Remember that children learn from the examples of those around them. The baby adopts a lot of his behavior from the family. If rough treatment in the family is the norm, then the baby will learn such forms, and the cruel behavior of adults will serve as prerequisites for neuroses. Remember that the baby's behavior is a complete mirror reflection of what is happening in the family. Very often, aggressive behavior is a reaction to lack of attention to the child, and thus the baby attracts attention to himself. The child learns that bad behavior quickly earns him long-awaited attention. Therefore, adults should communicate with the child as often as possible, supporting his positive communication with other people and peers.

It happens that attacks of aggression in a child are provoked by an atmosphere of indulgence, when the child never knows refusal and achieves everything with screams and hysterics. In this case, adults should be patient, because the more advanced the problem, the more difficult it is to carry out corrections to eliminate attacks of aggression in the child. You shouldn’t expect that the child will grow up and everything will change. A mandatory rule in communicating with a child is the constancy of adults’ demands in all situations, especially when aggression occurs.

Correcting attacks of aggression in a child includes involving game situations and acting them out with toy characters that are close to real situations. As soon as you teach your child to behave calmly, your baby will immediately find a common language with other children.

Attacks of aggression treatment

A psychologist will help you understand your own life. It is possible that you have chosen too high a pace for yourself, and have also placed unbearable loads on yourself. In this case, stress is also almost inevitable.

How to deal with attacks of aggression? Try not to keep all negative accumulated thoughts, as well as irritation, within yourself, because the more anger you have inside, the stronger the attacks of aggression will be. Slow down your personal pace of life and allow yourself to relax. If you feel that you cannot cope with work pressure, discuss this with your colleagues and superiors. Take a vacation, a long weekend, take a break from work. Taking herbal soothing teas (St. John's wort, thyme, oregano, peppermint, motherwort cordial, chamomile, valerian officinalis, linden cordate, etc.) will help relieve mental stress and prevent sudden attacks of aggression from developing.

How to get rid of attacks of aggression? Effective means are the transformation of aggressive tension into something else: sports, yoga, meditation.

Unmotivated frequent attacks of aggression and hatred are suppressed by taking atypical antipsychotics: Clozapine, Risperdal. Valproic acid, Lithium salts, Trazodone, Carbamazepine have a positive effect. Tricyclic antidepressants are highly effective.

A special place is given to psychotherapy in the treatment of attacks of aggression. There are specially developed techniques, the purpose of which is redirection and suppression.

After completing a course of psychotherapy, you can learn techniques for quickly relieving aggressive tension. For example, at the peak of unmotivated aggressiveness, tear newspapers to shreds, wash floors, wash clothes, hit a sofa cushion.

Get serious about sports. Sports anger will give an adrenaline rush and suppress your aggressive state.

How to deal with an aggressor? Assess the potential danger (objects that can be used for attack). Assess the physical behavior of the aggressor (fists or kicking). Always keep the aggressor in sight, control his behavior, never turn your back on him. Always take all verbal threats seriously and keep a safe distance. Do not hesitate to ask for additional help, because this concerns your safety. Be confident, remain calm, try to relieve aggression with a calm conversation, do not argue with the aggressor.

Hello, I'm 24 years old. I have a very sensitive sleep, mostly I am very aggressive when I can’t sleep or when something wakes me up. But it happens that I get angry very easily, and at the same time I almost begin to shake and it is often impossible to control my anger, which leads to consequences. I tried to learn to control myself, but still ended up losing it even more seriously after a while

• Hello, Evgeniy. Often, aggression and anger are beyond a person’s independent control for reasons beyond his control.
  Approximately 10% of adults suffer from a variety of personality disorders classified as borderline psychiatry. People suffering from this pathology usually do not understand the full extent of their disease and therefore do not consider it necessary to contact doctors for help.

Hello, I’m still 17, all my life I’ve been a calm, shy child. Over time, I began to work on my character, thereby becoming less shy... but now there are mild irritants (like: I gave a friend a cap, but he does not give it back as a joke) or when they argue with me for a long time. I don’t have time to understand how I’m already lashing out at these people with rude words or threats, sometimes I want to hit a person, but I always stop, after which I feel ashamed. It’s just that if I’m in a state of peace and someone disturbs it, then I break down...
I don't know, maybe it's teenage. But I can’t, I don’t want people to see me as such a person, I don’t want this to progress over time.

Hello! I would like to contact you. I myself have outbursts of anger, especially when they don’t understand me, touch my things, rearrange something, or try to argue with me. I want them to listen to me calmly and that’s all. At such moments, if people themselves do not calm down or even provoke them even more, then you want to break, cut or break something. When I break a couple of glasses, the aggression is removed almost instantly. At these moments you stop being yourself and cannot control yourself. What should I do? No matter how much I try, I can only be calm with very calm people. Neither meditation, nor yoga, nor sports help.

• Hello Irina. In this case, drug treatment and cognitive psychotherapy will help.

Hello!
I have problems with my husband. Periodically, it flares up out of the blue, it is impossible to stop it, it raises its hand. We have two small children, I fear for our future. The rest of the time he is a wonderful person, a caring father and a loving husband. He is ready to work with a psychologist or psychiatrist. But my question is: is it possible to get rid of these outbursts of anger forever? Or will there be a lull only while taking the medications? I live with him like on a volcano, you never know when an eruption will begin.

• Hello Svetlana. Your attending physician will answer all questions regarding treatment, but only after an in-person consultation and diagnostics.

Hello! I love my husband, but he has terrible temper tantrums... the last one resulted in me being beaten. By all indications, he has a psychopathy. Is there any point in fighting for our marriage or is everything doomed? Should we both see a psychologist?

Hello!
A loved one has experienced severe psychological trauma in the past (he was threatened for some time after the incident).
Now he has a fear of large crowds of people, big cities and a mania of persecution. He is afraid that he is being followed and that he will be killed.
In this regard, he has attacks of aggression.
It didn’t come to the point of assault, but in words he ceases to control himself.
He doesn’t want treatment, and frank conversations don’t help... Please tell me how to help him. Thank you in advance!

• Hello Lina. Try to create such an atmosphere for your loved one so that he can rethink everything that is happening to him. He needs to analyze his feelings and accept them internally, coming to terms with the negative experience. This is necessary in order to continue to move forward in life and not get stuck on your experiences. Love, understanding, harmony, and emotional contact on your part will be important to him. The fact that he breaks down and becomes aggressive is normal for his condition. It is difficult for him to suppress his emotions and not allow them to come out. Thus, his nervous mental tension finds an outlet. Therefore, we recommend not to irritate him in actions and words, but to try to become a necessary and indispensable person for him.

Good day...I'm shouting about my problem!!! Help! I’m a guy, I’m 21. I’ve caught my youngest nephew, he’s 11, smoking or lying more than once, and every time I take it out on him. ...in anger I almost beat him. Recently I had a fight with my wife, she really hurt my male ego and I flared up, everything went dark in my eyes, I destroyed everything in the apartment, threw her on the bed, on the floor... in general, I went wild... when I saw fear and tears in her eyes, she called me the devil then they let me go and I silently left... help me!!! I apologize for the errors in the text. I am writing in desperation.

Hello. I have a friend. He turns 19 years old. He often has attacks of aggression. He can throw out all his anger either verbally, that is, by yelling at everyone who is nearby, or in addition to this, by kicking or punching the door several times, and he can also throw everything that is nearby. Such outbursts mainly happen in the presence of his mother, since he does not like that she pesters him with all sorts of questions. Personally, I think that, firstly, he was raised that way, and secondly, inheritance from his dad. He seems to understand that this is not normal, but he can’t do anything about it. Please tell me what to do in this case for both me and him!!

I am 36 years old. In my youth I did not notice any outbursts of aggression. Then it started. He was convicted of intentionally causing bodily harm. I got free, came to the village - everyone drinks here! Constant brawls and fights, these people irritate and offend me, I want to answer them and even hit them, but I understand that I will get jail time again. I’m holding on with all my might, I’m afraid I won’t be able to control the aggression! Became nervous. Moved to the city to avoid confrontations with these people. But I'm afraid that the situation may repeat itself here. Tell me what to do??

• Hello, Evgeniy. First of all, do not resist internally what you do not agree with. If people want to drink - let them drink, if they want to fight - let them fight, if they want to degrade and not develop - so be it. This is their life choice, not yours.
  At the moment of approaching aggression, when everything is boiling inside, change the topic of conversation, leave, switch your attention to something neutral and pleasant for you.
  Tell yourself words of self-command: “Stop.” Self-orders always precede the actions performed.
  Accept people for who they are with all their flaws, just watch them and everything that happens. Don't change them and the situation around you. You cannot change the world, but you can change your attitude towards everything that happens and live calmly.
  “I moved to the city to avoid clashes with these people” - In the city, of course, it is easier to avoid unnecessary contacts with people, but they will still remain. Don't expand your circle of friends.
  In your case, communication with animals and being in the fresh air as much as possible will be ideal, which will calm the nervous system.
  Glycine and valerian in tablets will also help keep your psycho-emotional state normal.

Hello. I am 28 years old, I suffer from attacks of aggression, and I understand that I am doing the wrong thing, but I can’t do anything. I live with my daughter, husband and his mother. My daughter (4 years old) is already afraid of me. Any detail can turn me on, everything irritates me, first I scream like crazy (and sometimes I swing my arms), and then I roar. I walk like a raw nerve. There is no opportunity to live separately yet. What to do?

Hello. My mother often has angry outbursts. She cannot explain anything in just a calm voice, she always screams. Constantly breaks down for no good reason. Unwashed dishes can cause a scandal. She screams, swears, and can even hit you in the face (and not weakly, but with all her might). And she constantly repeats the same phrases, something like “Shut your mouth!” and everything like that. When she is in a normal mood, she behaves adequately and friendly, but as soon as something upsets her, she looks like an animal in a rage. I understand that all people can face problems like disobedient teenage children who constantly argue and dissuade, a mess in the house, but they solve it in the most peaceful way, and my mother just naturally starts screaming at the top of her lungs. How can I explain to her that this is not normal?

• Hello, Ulya. If you start explaining to your mother that it is not normal to raise your voice and engage in physical assault, you will encounter even greater misunderstanding in your address, since for her personally there is this good reason why she loses her temper.
  Often this model of behavior suits many aggressors; moreover, it is so comfortable for them that they are already dependent on this behavior.
  Scientists have already proven that the breakdown of negative emotions in close circles gives great pleasure to the aggressor, so breakdowns will be repeated with a certain frequency, unless, of course, the aggressor himself begins to control himself and change.
  We recommend that you read:
  

Good day, my name is Roman, I’m 31 years old. I have a problem, I’m very aggressive... I used to think that the whole world around me was a continuous gladiatorial arena in which I needed to constantly fight... You can’t trust anyone, you have to be like a lone wolf... Cunning, evil, cruel, purposeful, ignorant of pity, but with a touch of humanity, justice, honesty, devotion... this is how I thought at the age of 20, years later I realized that the world is not a battle arena, but a path to self-realization... The path of self-knowledge , strengthening the soul and body.. In this world, there is also humanity, justice... I realized this late... After living for a certain time with such an attitude, I became aggressive, cruel, and in the end I got confused in myself...
I have outbursts of anger, aggression, as a result of a small quarrel or argument... The anger becomes stronger and stronger... Every time after this, I tell myself that this will not happen again... But when aggression takes hold of me, I forget about that promise to himself...
I started playing sports, I thought it would help, relieve emotional stress, remove negative energy, but no... the energy just pours out of me... It feels like I’m hyper active, and these energy bursts provoke aggression... It’s already starting to seem to me that I’m no one understands that my opinion is more important than others... it scares me. I understand that I am not healthy...
Tell me if I need therapy, communication with a psychologist or yoga classes would be suitable.

• • Hello, thank you.

Hello, please tell me, I have the same problem. Tomorrow I will be 22 years old, and I feel that I am tired of life, it seems that nothing is working out and will never work out. Lately, I have started to have outbursts of aggression and anger, when I want to break something, break something, vandalize it, or hurt myself. She was always a very modest girl, she was afraid of a lot of things, because of this she was uncommunicative, closed, and sad. I’ve never had a boyfriend, my parents cultivate this idea in me, they say that it’s scary and no one will love it. I don't want to live anymore, what should I do?

Hello. I suffer a lot from angry outbursts due to postpartum depression and disappointment in men in general. I have no one to ask for help and there is no way to find a man. Please tell me what can I do? This pain and rage eats away at me from the inside... I experience hatred for myself, for people and for the world almost constantly, and very often, with external stimuli, it turns into rage with physical pain in the chest and the desire to tear someone apart (including myself). ) into parts. Valerian does not help, I am breastfeeding, please advise something (((

Hello. The problem I have is uncontrollable outbursts of anger, but the main thing is that they are unpredictable. One good thing is that they don’t last long. A typical example - I’m sitting, not bothering anyone, and suddenly bam, something near me breaks into pieces... then the thought arises: “why?” Or even complete bewilderment. The excitement goes away almost immediately, and sometimes within a few minutes. But I’ve already done something... please tell me where to start.

• Hello, Leonid. Start with a practicing psychologist. A specialist will diagnose you and if a borderline state is detected, the psychologist will carry out corrective work with you; if a deviation from the norm is discovered, then you will have to contact a psychotherapist for help.

  • Thank you. I'll try again...

Probably no one has ever brought this up. There are three brothers and one sister, all over 60, they are related to each other (hereinafter referred to as “relatives”). These people have children, they are cousins ​​among themselves (hereinafter referred to as cousins), after 40 and before 30. Relatives are in a state of “a bad peace is better than a good war”: they sometimes communicate, sometimes they don’t speak for years, sister and brothers communicate in the format “how things are going well, it will be bad, wait (I’ll arrange it),” but there are individual observations: their behavior is despotic, they control material wealth, position in society, the family status of each other and their cousins. They do actions that look like gestures of goodwill, but in reality the harm lasts for years and brings a blow to their authority in society. Cousins ​​also communicate with each other. But at the same time, all cousins ​​are extremely dependent on the opinion of their parents and are in terrible depression because of this, some commit stupid acts on the advice of their parents, others take advantage of situations of guilt and extract money for their petty needs. Only 3 people out of the entire cohort have the intention to create and develop, but the majority of consumers pursuing them destroy all desires to create and do something. Everyone wants one thing: to contemptuously condemn everyone, as the sister of her brothers does for 10 years. He has suffered from psychopathy since childhood and influences his children in this way: in order to be superior to others, it is necessary to undermine the authority of cousins, and to do this, tactfully collect information and, through telephone communication, report “some invented nonsense”, as if warning about their danger and dishonesty. There is a result, but during the investigation everything becomes clear. But this sister does not lose hope. And she made of her children “a cultivator of evil intentions covered with sweet smiles.” Her children are unhappy in principle. He doesn't see this. Blames his cousins ​​for their misfortune. It seems easier this way. Harm others before they become higher than you, although in case of help they will have no one to turn to, only back to the cousins ​​whom they hated so much. Relatives have psychopathy and carefully disguised despotism. Should you interrupt such relationships and protect yourself from them, since after communicating with this it is already clear that they will remain the same? How to protect your children from the bad influence of relatives and cousins?

• Narek, the topic of relationships with close relatives, if they have character accentuations, an authoritarian and despotic style of communication, is very sensitive. If you don’t communicate with them at all, then they may perceive it as disrespect, ignoring, and if you communicate, then you will need to follow their life guidelines and rules.
  Therefore, the best option for the younger generation in such families is to move to another city for a new job or while studying at a university with subsequent employment.

30 years of marriage, every month my husband has an attack of aggression, hatred, he repeats his entire life of grievances against all his loved ones, as he imagined them for himself - it’s offensive and without reason. If I don’t respond, I don’t enter into dialogue, they’ll still pester me personally, call me names in every way, humiliate me, insult me, all sorts of offensive nonsense. He starts screaming until he is physically exhausted, then he feels better and sleeps. In the morning he seems to be kinder, but he never apologizes. He remembers grievances against everyone, demands to calm him down, I don’t know how to distract his aggression and humiliation. I have no feelings left, I can’t play. Just waiting for the next attack. How should I behave!

• • Good afternoon
    Tell me what to do, my niece is 11 years old, she terrorizes all her loved ones, her mother, grandmother, throws hysterics for any reason, for example, someone touched her things, they brought the wrong game, at the slightest reason she starts throwing tantrums, throwing everything around, tearing, cutting, etc. this can continue throughout the day or night, and she is not afraid of anything, not physical force, not persuasion, nothing at all, everyone is constantly under stress, that hysterics can start at any moment, she doesn’t listen to anything, she can’t speak, she doesn’t care at all side.
    They didn’t drag me to the doctor with persuasion or deception, I was just in despair, tell me what to do?
    Thank you.

An attack of aggression occurs after there is a sharp or smooth mild pain in the right or left side of the brain, as if a blood vessel had burst, and then something happens. The attack is short-lived. I took Gidazepam and Truxal for a month and a half, while I was taking it, it seemed like nothing, but I stopped - the attack remained, like a shooting in my head, and sometimes it shoots once a day. Yes! And further! I felt fear in my chest, so the fear disappeared after taking the drugs.

In psychology, the concept of “aggression” means behavior aimed at causing harm to other living beings, people or animals, who do not want this. Often we ourselves become victims of other people’s attacks of aggression, and sometimes we ourselves feel the desire to cause pain - physical or mental. Why does this happen and how to deal with inner demons?

Symptoms of aggressive attacks

In order to notice signs of aggression on the part of a person, you do not need to be a highly qualified specialist:

• nervous and unreasonable reaction to the words and actions of people, including loved ones;
• attacks of anger, during which a person breaks into a scream and uses physical force against people or objects nearby.

However, only a highly qualified specialist can help cope with attacks of aggression, saving the patient and his loved ones from them.

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Causes of attacks of aggression

Psychologists at the EUROMEDPRESTIGE medical center recognize that there are many reasons that can provoke attacks of aggression. In some cases, they lie on the surface, but often in order to find the cause and subsequent solution to the problem, the psychologist has to work hard:

• psychological release. Occurs when a person needs to relieve accumulated tension, after which he experiences relief;
• aggression instilled as normal behavior in childhood. As a child, a person looks at his parents, unconsciously copying their behavior pattern. If it is customary in a family to shout at each other and show negative emotions in every possible way, such reactions become habitual;
• self-defense. A person feels the need for self-defense when other people invade his personal space;
• aggression resulting from the inability to realize one’s needs. If a person is unable to get what he wants, anger and attacks of aggression almost always appear on his part. Moreover, these attacks can be directed not only at other people and things, but also at oneself. Needless to say, their psychological state is getting worse every day?
• low levels of cholesterol, dopamine, serotonin in the blood;
• high levels of norepinephrine, adrenaline.

Treatment of attacks of aggression

Doctors at the EUROMEDPRESTIGE clinic point out that a psychologist should be involved in the treatment of attacks of aggression. This is explained by the fact that often the patient cannot correctly identify the causes of his condition on his own, and, accordingly, change his aggressive behavior.

After consultation with a psychologist, the patient receives certain recommendations. As a rule, this is the need to slow down the pace of life, allowing yourself to relax and unwind. In some periods of life, a person needs to delegate some of his responsibilities to work colleagues or even take a vacation and devote time to himself. If for some reason this cannot be done, psychologists suggest sublimating aggressive energy into sports, throwing out negative emotions through sports.

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Sublimation of aggression is also possible through its transformation into other feelings - safer for a person and his environment. This method of treating attacks of aggression is not the simplest, but incredibly effective. To use it effectively, each specific case of an outburst of aggression should be carefully considered. After a detailed study, the psychologist offers the best option for transforming aggressive energy.

Sedatives, breathing exercises, and water procedures have a positive effect, but they can only serve as an additional means in the treatment of attacks of aggression, since they eliminate the effect, not the cause.

In any case, psychologists at the EUROMEDPRESTIGE medical center insist that accumulating aggressive energy in oneself day after day is fraught with unpredictable consequences for both the person and his environment. The more unexpressed aggression inside, the more frequent and severe the attacks become. If you feel that you cannot cope with depressing feelings on your own, entrust your mental health to specialists.

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