How to get rid of depression during maternity leave. Depression on maternity leave: what we are afraid to admit to ourselves

You shouldn’t think that depression while on maternity leave is a temporary phenomenon. Often it turns into prolonged stress, which destroys not only relationships, but also your entire life.

Fatigue. It is most clearly expressed in the first months after the birth of the baby. This is where irritability, apathy, and alienation appear. Here you need to realize that all this is temporary, and literally in a month and a half, when the child grows up, everything will begin to change.
Lack of diversity. The young mother is forced to constantly be in a confined space. In order to eliminate this problem, you need to expand your vision: you can also visit with your child, walk along different routes, go shopping, etc.
Dissatisfaction with appearance. After childbirth, a woman's figure changes a lot. And not only she herself notices this, but also her husband. Hence the lack of attention and irritability. Conclusion: you urgently need to improve your diet and be sure to exercise.
"Bad Mom" Syndrome. It is clearly expressed in women who have given birth to their first child. They feel like they can't handle anything, don't know anything, and are doing everything wrong. In such cases, you need to listen to adults more, and all words should be perceived not as a desire to teach, but as advice to make you feel better.

Depression on maternity leave. What to do

Find your favorite thing

Things to do while in maternity leave:

Work from home. If the type of your work activity allows you, then take some of your work home. And you will be busy, and you will receive money.
Hobby. Think about what you like to do: maybe embroidery, making mini-presentations, sewing, blogging, etc. The only thing that needs to be taken into account is the peculiarities of your daily routine and the child’s behavior. Do you have enough time and patience to do what you love without sacrificing attention to your loved ones?
Self-development. You can increase the level of your knowledge through literature, the Internet, as well as through special courses (manicure, nail extensions, driving, etc.).

Don't forget about your vacation

Here are a few options on how you can help yourself get out of depression while on maternity leave:

Daytime sleep. When you put your baby to bed, lie down yourself, because this great holiday for the body.
Relaxing bath before bed. While you're doing your evening chores, turn on the water to fill the bath so you don't have to waste time. It is recommended to add medicinal salts and flavored foam.
Sports activities. Do you feel like this is not a vacation? Are you already tired, but still need to do exercises? In vain. After all, nothing lifts your mood and tone your body like sports. Of course, not immediately, but after regular training. It’s not for nothing that they say: “Life is in motion!” On top of that, you can quickly return your figure to normal after childbirth.
Reading books and magazines. This way you can learn something new or immerse yourself in a different, fictional world.
Communication with dear people . Often, in the process of carrying out all the tasks, a mother simply does not have time to talk for a long time with loved ones or answer calls, so she needs to carve out a little time for this. It is better to do this when you are not busy and not irritated.

Walking without children

This prerequisite. Every mother simply must get out of the house for at least 2 hours a week. This is not a whim, not identification with a child, but a simple prudent attitude towards oneself and one’s psyche.

Important!
Try to make this time spent without your child as different from your everyday life as possible. If you watch some program at home on the couch, there will be no point in such a rest. But if you go to meet your girlfriends, arrange it with your husband romantic date, have fun with a trip, going to the cinema, bowling, etc. - all this will significantly affect your mood as a whole.

Finding new like-minded people

A great option for this is a women's forum. By registering on the selected site, you can create own blogs, diaries, notes, as well as comment on other people’s observations, read interesting and useful information.

The biggest advantage here is that you choose the topic that interests you and that you want to communicate about.

If you don't have time to sit at the computer, expand your circle of acquaintances. The easiest way for mom to do this is on the playground. This way you will not only be able to find a good companion for a walk, but also, perhaps, make a good friend.

Holiday in everything

Learn to live positively. Make even the most ordinary trip for everyday things more interesting for yourself: look more carefully at the assortment, smell the smells, give preference to something unusual. So even a purchase detergents it will be more fun for you.
Look at some online store for interesting things for home improvement. These can be a wide variety of shoe racks, hangers, kitchen utensils, flower pots, etc. After all, you have the opportunity to make the world around you more unusual.
When buying clothes for yourself and your family start giving preference to bright things. Psychologists have long proven their ability to positively influence mood.

Accept any help

It doesn’t matter why you refuse help - the desire to be independent, long-standing grievances, differences in upbringing, etc. You must understand that this reason is on the list of those that resulted from your depression. In the end, it's for your own good.

The person who comes to meet you halfway, offering help, knows what he is doing, which means it is not a burden to him - he wants to make it easier for you. So why offend him with your refusals?

What should my husband do?

Take an interest in your wife's health and condition. Maybe sometimes she's just too shy to tell you what's bothering her, or she just doesn't want to be a burden.
Take some of the household chores on yourself. She should feel your concern.
Compliment her. Remember that women love with their ears.
Don't insist on intimacy. Since she is now having a hard time mentally, your demands will only worsen the situation. In addition to the fact that she will become even more depressed, your relationship as a whole will gradually begin to collapse.
Try to “stir up” her with pleasant impressions. It could be gifts or a good time.
Don't tell her that she can't do something.. Just kindly help her.

Involve your husband in raising your child to the maximum. Talk frankly with your husband, tell him that it is difficult for you to cope with some responsibilities. The conversation should be conducted exclusively in a positive way - without scandals, shouting and reproaches. Use tricks: say that you want your child to be very similar to him, and this can be facilitated cooperative games and all kinds of communication with the child. But be prudent: if your spouse gets up early in the morning for work, do not ask him to get up all night so that he can calm the child down.
Read books about development and raising children. There's a lot written there useful information. Of these, not only a young mother, but also adult woman Having successfully raised several children, she learns something new. They often provide examples of real-life situations. Such techniques make it possible to more easily come to certain conclusions. Moreover, after reading this literature, many mothers will understand that the child’s nervousness and whims are not a consequence of their inept handling of the baby, but features of age-related changes.
Enter a reward system. Set goals for yourself throughout the day. As soon as you successfully complete them, do yourself a favor: buy goodies, things, set aside more time for doing what you love, etc.
Don't isolate yourself. Communicate more. Preferably not only with girlfriends. Discuss various questions: raising a child, relationship with husband (in general outline, without details), your own feelings, etc. In response, you will hear a lot of advice, examples of how to do it and how not to do it.
Find a nanny. If your relatives do not have the opportunity to help you raise your child, a person offering his services for money will help you get distracted. You can find a full-time nanny working week, and only on weekends. If the first option gives access to work, the second – for your own leisure.
Don't exaggerate. After all, many women have gone through childbirth. And some - more than once. Think about the fact that you were able to give life to a new person. And this cannot cause depression while on maternity leave.

Video: Life after childbirth: how not to go crazy

Just yesterday you were so cheerful and cheerful, today, sitting on maternity leave to care for a child, do you feel overwhelmed and unhappy? This definitely needs to be corrected and not let go of letting depression control you. How to do this? Specific descriptive situations will help you find your way out.

You've probably heard the term burnout. This means that a person’s internal supply of energy and strength is depleted over time if it is not replenished. The reason for this may include nervous tension. If we talk about a mother on maternity leave, the causes of burnout will be lack of sleep, malnutrition, and fear for the baby. They may well provoke such burnout. Agree that no one will remove you from the position of mother, which means that now you work 24 hours and you have the most demanding boss - your child. Tell me honestly, do you put off eating to please your baby? Do you also dream about relaxation and an extra 15 minutes in the bathroom? Are you always on guard and ready to act? Keep in mind that at this pace you are taking confident steps towards the process of burnout.

I hope that the examples below will be useful to you, as they say: “Forewarned is forearmed.”

A state of chronic irritability.

If you don’t have the opportunity to sometimes switch from your immediate responsibilities of caring for the baby, household chores - in a word, you don’t have assistants, then after a while you begin to understand that just a little more will boil and explode. You are annoyed by everything that happens around you: any misdeed of a child, or inattention of a husband can serve as a reason for a quarrel. You scream, you get offended, and then you cry because you realize that you are wrong, and you apologize to your loved ones for the breakdown. But a little time passes, and a quarrel may arise again... It’s just some kind of vicious circle. But, fortunately, it is quite possible to break it!

In order not to throw incomprehensible hysterics, first accept the fact that you are not infinite, and you need to rest. And for this you need to learn to make time for yourself personally. Going to a salon for a haircut, coloring, manicure, massage and other feminine pleasures is a great opportunity to pamper yourself and get out into the world for a change of scenery. Maybe it will just be meeting a friend in a cafe or buying something for yourself. It doesn’t matter what you do – the main thing is to do it for yourself! And then, when you have a little rest, think about whether you are planning your day correctly, and whether you are giving yourself too much work? Maybe it's time to stop rushing? Believe me, by doing several things at the same time, you are not saving time, you are simply irrationally wearing yourself out! Please pay attention to this.

Mom is in a state of lack of internal strength.

We will talk about the insufficiency of your internal resources, thanks to which you enjoy every day, charge those around you with your enthusiasm, good mood and enjoy caring for the baby.

Whatever calm child, but it grows and requires attention: first it’s teeth, tummy, then crawling, first steps, and so on. Sleepless nights, maximum attention and anxiety for the health of the baby exhaust you, fatigue accumulates, and because of it you become inattentive, even absent-minded in something. And now you begin to get bruises and bumps, knocking your toes on furniture corners, bruising your fingers, crumbling vegetables, you begin to forget important things that you planned the day before. Attention becomes less sharp, and memory becomes “leaky.” By completely unconsciously saving your strength, you infringe on the child in your tenderness, you smile less often, and the people around you also lack your attention. Due to this lack of internal reserve, you may soon become more withdrawn. Sad prospect, isn't it? How to fix everything?

A new hobby, a kind of emotional shake-up, will help. It's about about a new hobby (as an option). This could be handicrafts (knitting, embroidery, scrapbooking, modeling, making jewelry, etc.), studying foreign language(you don’t even need to take courses for this - everything can be found on the Internet), you can become an online consultant on a thematic forum. Choosing an activity to your liking is a matter of your talents and desires. And then you won’t even notice how it appears free time in a seemingly completely “crowded” schedule for a new hobby. And who knows, maybe after a while your hobby will become your profession. Believe in yourself, in your strengths - even on maternity leave, you can grow professionally and, doing what you love, get rid of psychological discomfort.

If you're feeling low

Excessive nervous tension is fraught not only with breakdowns and scandals, but also psychosomatic problems that affect health. It could also be problems with blood pressure, disruption of work gastrointestinal tract, headaches, may decrease sexual attraction to her husband and so on. It’s not for nothing that they say that all diseases are caused by nerves.

And how can you help your nervous system? You know, in this case you can’t do without the help of specialists. It’s one thing to get enough sleep and calm down, but it’s another thing when malfunctions in the body’s functioning appear. Don’t put off visiting the doctor: the sooner you start therapy, the faster you will return to your normal state.

Initiative and enthusiasm beyond measure are punishable.

When a child is born, a young mother, being in a state of emotional upsurge, tries not to be away from the baby for a second, postponing until later and “somehow later” things that are important to her, such as eating, proper rest, and sleep. Such refusal or even renunciation will not lead to anything good. Remember, your internal strength is limited, and it won’t be more than it is if you don’t replenish it. It's like constantly drawing from a source and not giving it the opportunity to recover. Sooner or later you will see the bottom. For a month, three, maybe six months, maybe a year you will last non-stop, carrying everything on yourself, and then? But the family members around you are already, to put it mildly, accustomed to the fact that you do everything yourself, and your sudden impulse to refuse this may not have the best impact on the family. in the best possible way. The child will be capricious without you while you are resting - he is used to always being with you. And the husband will not want to sit with the baby - he even, thanks to your excessive care, does not know which side to approach him and where in the house there are diaper toys. This is your recovery plan internal forces may fail without even beginning to be implemented, and the body’s resources, meanwhile, melt and melt.

So what should I do? What should I do? There is a way out. If suddenly your situation is similar to the one described above, don’t wait for an emotional breakdown, act. Start with 30 minutes a day just for yourself. Let it be a cup of coffee or tea, but you have the right to drink it in absolute peace, listening to your favorite music or reading a book. There is such an old, bearded joke, key phrase which is the final chord of the mother: “Quiet, sha, I am making you a happy mother!” So, start small, gradually building up these 30 minutes to several hours a day, when you can be your own boss. And don’t immediately say that this is unrealistic. The main thing is to want, set a goal and work to achieve it!

And finally.

Sitting at home, on maternity leave, very often young mothers “let themselves go,” plunging headlong into everyday life and completely forgetting about themselves, once loved. Monotonous everyday life with a small child and a list homework not very conducive to growth and development. No, of course, the little one’s daily small victories and successes make him happy, you are happy to be proud of them and tell all your friends and relatives about it. Someone will rejoice with you, someone will just smile, and someone will not be interested. But life doesn’t stop there, does it?

Children are wonderful, and when they appear in the family, you understand that you have moved to a new level of your development. You and your spouse have become parents. And living with the interests and concerns of little ones, sharing everything with them is wonderful, but life is not limited solely to bottles, rattles and pots, and cleaning. Don’t be afraid to be interested in something else besides household chores; periodically give yourself emotional and psychological relief and shake-ups. Remember: your family needs you as a happy mother and wife!

Depression while on maternity leave is a fairly common phenomenon. There is no need to think that it appears temporarily. Prolonged stress can be dangerous to a woman's health. Let's look at why depression develops during maternity leave, how it manifests itself and how to avoid it.

Why is depression dangerous?

Each of us has heard about emotional burnout. A person's internal reserve of strength is not unlimited. A person suffers from a depressed mood, his sleep is disturbed, he is overcome by suspiciousness, shyness, and indecisiveness. All these are signs of depression, which often develops in women on maternity leave. If left untreated, this condition can become uncontrollable and cause harm.

Research shows that depression can cause many diseases:

First of all, depression increases the risk of developing heart attack. Long-term depressed mood is a path to the development of cardiovascular pathologies.
In depression, nutrition is disrupted: a person is prone to drinking large quantity sweets and products with high content carbohydrates. And this is the reason for the development diabetes mellitus. Research shows that diabetes and depression are related diseases.
People suffering from depression are prone to obesity.
Prolonged depressed mood reduces mental abilities person.
Long-term untreated depression is the cause of the development of chronic pain. And often physiological reasons Such pain cannot be identified during a medical examination. Treatment chronic pain When you are in a depressed mood, it becomes much more difficult.
People with depression experience poorer performance immune system. As a result, they suffer from infectious diseases more often than others.
The worst thing is that depression is the cause of cancer.

Reasons

Even if a child is calm, this does not mean that he does not require attention. Result - sleepless nights, constant tension of attention and anxiety about the health of the small creature. Strength gradually decreases, fatigue accumulates. Because of this, the mother becomes inattentive, tired, and absent-minded.

Postpartum sadness and despondency develop for the following reasons:

Extreme fatigue. It is most pronounced in the first time after childbirth. It is typical that young mothers feel increased irritability and even alienation.
Monotonous life. The first time after giving birth, the woman is near the baby, and this space does not change for her. There is no time left for communication, much less entertainment. If every day is similar to each other and consists of a cycle of endlessly repeating events, then sooner or later the emotional exhaustion.
Changing appearance, a woman’s dissatisfaction with her appearance. This is due to the fact that after childbirth a woman’s figure changes. And this, in turn, is the cause of increased irritability, because efforts to be beautiful become futile.
Women who have had their first birth develop the so-called bad mother syndrome. They unreasonably think that they can’t do anything and can’t cope with the baby. In addition, all words and advice from adults are perceived as teachings, which only aggravates the situation.
Lack of opportunity for self-realization and self-affirmation.
Lack of time to rest. A woman cannot be alone for at least half an hour, buy something, cook, watch TV, etc. Naturally, sooner or later her nerves begin to fray.
Limited or lack of communication. It often happens that a young mother has to communicate in a “childish” language. But natural need is communication with people. As a result, a woman is highly likely to have a nervous breakdown.

Symptoms

You can suspect depression based on the following signs:

irritability (young mothers begin to get irritated by every little thing);
increased fatigue;
drowsiness during the day, sleep disturbance at night;
a feeling of weakness that does not go away even after rest;
positive emotions cease to be a source of former joy;
the appearance of a feeling of guilt, one’s own inferiority;
the appearance of a feeling of lack of time (the woman feels that she does not have the strength to perform ordinary duties);
is decreasing emotional background;
severe emotional exhaustion, when a woman is not happy with anything;
she is overcome by thoughts of how to escape from home;
communication with her husband also does not bring any pleasure, which ultimately worsens the situation in the family.

Don't lose your health

The period of childcare is very stressful for a woman. And you don’t need to think that within 3 years the young mother will take a break from work. Quite the opposite: caring for a child is that very work, and it is very stressful and difficult.

How to get out of depression and how to prevent the development of chronic fatigue?

These tips will help new mothers:

Condition wellness and vigor - this is a dream during the day. You should try to sleep during the day when you put your baby to bed. This best vacation for a tired body.
Before going to bed, you can take a relaxing bath. It will remove negative emotions and set you up for night rest. This will make your sleep much stronger. It is recommended to add a little to the water sea salt or natural essential oils.
You definitely need to play sports. Regular and easy exercise will improve your tone and drive away depression. You definitely need to set aside time to study fresh air: They make you feel physically and emotionally uplifted.
Reading is the best way to occupy yourself during leisure time.
Depression while on maternity leave will disappear if you regularly communicate with those you care about. Spend at least a little time communicating and see how your mood improves.
Some child care responsibilities can be redistributed to a husband or grandmother. A young mother should devote at least an hour a day to rest. You don’t have to look up to other mothers, how they are busy raising and caring for a child all day long, because your health is completely different.
Under no circumstances should you resort to drinking alcohol. It is not an antidepressant, and in most cases it only worsens the problem.
You should always set yourself realistic and achievable goals. This way you won't feel like you can't handle anything.
You need to be able to determine for yourself the so-called crisis point, after which you need to quit some things and relax. Otherwise, emotional exhaustion is inevitable.

You need to accept the fact that it is necessary to rest, no matter how busy your daily schedule may be. After all, anyone, even the most strong body not iron. You need to find time for the most common feminine joys: going to nail salon or a hairdresser, for a massage, etc. Even a meeting in a cafe with girlfriends can brighten up the endless bustle.

Activities Options

Maternity leave is not only time to care for a child. If a woman uses the time she has rationally, she will be able to use it for self-development, self-improvement and other useful things. Naturally, there will be no room for despondency on such a vacation.

Here are the most suitable methods keep yourself busy with useful and enjoyable things:

Easy and not burdensome remote work. You can perform part of your work responsibilities remotely, that is, from home. It's also a good way to earn some money.
You can also think about a pleasant activity in your free time. This is sewing, knitting, etc. Start your own blog and start filling it out: you had no idea how interesting it is. The only thing that needs to be taken into account for this is the child’s daily routine. It is recommended to adapt specifically to its mode.
Try to increase your intellectual level. Maternity leave is not a hindrance to this. Moreover, the time has come to improve some of your knowledge and learn a foreign language.
Why not take a driving course while on maternity leave? Some women use this. Having mastered the art of manicure, nail extensions, etc., you can also earn some good money.
Even an ordinary trip to the store can be turned into a small celebration. To do this, you just need to take a closer look at the assortment of goods and buy something nice. Even a small purchase can lift your spirits. And by purchasing something to improve your home, you can update it, which also helps fight depression.
Bright clothes can drive away melancholy and improve your mood. It’s even better if your family wears cheerful clothes: this way you can organize a holiday for everyone.
There is no need to be shy about accepting someone's help. Moreover, it is necessary to forgive long-standing grievances and accept life as it is.
Locking yourself in is the worst thing that can happen. Try to discuss pressing issues with friends and family: this will make life brighter and more diverse.

Treatment

In some cases it is necessary to resort to drug treatment depression during maternity leave.

It is shown only in extreme cases when other methods of influence do not help. Self-medication with antidepressants is under no circumstances allowed.

Antidepressants are enough potent drugs. Most of them are used only under strict supervision, since even a slight excess of the dosage contributes to the occurrence of side effects.

Good and at the same time effective way get rid of depression - aromatherapy. Essential oils can be used in a bath. Once in the body, they promote recovery peace of mind, uplifting mood. It is best to have a doctor select essential oils: self-treatment oils can be harmful in some cases. All oils should be used only natural: artificial oil substitutes are of little use. Works best on the body essential oils lavender, lemon balm, rosemary, orange.

So, depression during childcare is completely preventable and treatable. However, it is still better not to bring yourself to such a state.

Few people are able to withstand a routine existence for three years and still remain a kind, sweet and full of energy person. And it's not just about physical fatigue, although it certainly plays a role, it also plays a role in emotional burnout. It is common to all professionals who work with people. And mother is quite a serious profession!

Symptoms of depression and burnout:

weakness, drowsiness;
constantly reduced emotional background;
apathy, indifference to what is happening;
what previously brought joy or pleasure becomes uninteresting;
increased irritability, nervousness;
feeling like a bad mother;
the feeling that you can’t cope with your responsibilities, that you can’t do anything and don’t have time.

And now “Little Red Riding Hood” for the hundred thousandth time does not seem to you such an exciting thriller, and every performance in a home puppet theater, where you invariably get the role of a bear, becomes hard labor. And the children, as luck would have it, behave terribly, and the husband does not understand anything. You are offended by the whole world and only dream of running away from home... Is this a familiar situation? Then it's time to figure out the reasons for this condition.

Causes of depression and burnout

Physical exhaustion. Lack of sleep and malnutrition, which were not able to break you during your school years, now immediately make themselves felt.
Lack of variety. When every day is similar to the previous 10 and the next 10 and consists of a cycle of bottles, diapers, cereals and toys, you begin to feel like the hero of Groundhog Day. With only one difference: he could afford to have fun and throw himself off a cliff...
Impossibility of self-realization. Most likely, the role of an uninterrupted food supplier and cleaning lady is not the limit of your dreams, and therefore you are depressed by the thought that on all other fronts you are losing ground.
Dissatisfaction with your appearance. Even if you have already restored your figure after childbirth, daily makeup, hairstyle like from a salon, and stilettos are unlikely to have a place in your life. This alone can make you feel despondent.
Lack of time for yourself. Everyone knows that everyone needs personal time. to a normal person. And everyone wants to relax, be alone, buy, watch and cook something for themselves. And when you have to devote every minute of your life to someone else (even your beloved baby), sooner or later your nerves can’t stand it.
Lack of interlocutors and like-minded people. This is especially hard on mothers who, for one reason or another, are deprived of the company of their grandmothers and friends and are forced to communicate only in the language of “Ku-ku” and “Moo-mu” while their husband is at work.

How not to end up with a life like this

Set yourself feasible goals. Not “raise a happy and beautiful genius,” but “feed and put to bed.” Most mothers feel that they are not coping with their tasks precisely because they choose unattainable, global goals.
Forget about perfectionism. Even if you have a gold medal and a red diploma, remember that no one has ever succeeded in becoming an ideal parent who raised an ideal child. Nature does not tolerate perfection, which means you shouldn’t even try to run ahead of the rest. Something will have to be sacrificed: not looking perfect, not washing the dishes every time after eating, or not always fulfilling the baby’s wishes.
Don't expect gratitude. You shouldn’t sacrifice your health and nerves and then reproach your child for the rest of your life with the words “But I put my whole life on you.” He doesn't have to be grateful. And you don’t even have to say “thank you” for porridge in the morning. Just do what you do. In the end, which of you wanted whom?
Communicate with your child for pleasure, not out of duty. It’s better to play something you like with your baby for 30 minutes than to spend 2 hours doing another developmental activity that is uninteresting to you simply because “they write about it everywhere.”
Don't focus on others. And both on other children and on their parents. Your baby is unique. And maybe he doesn’t quote Pushkin, like the girl from the fifth floor, but, unlike her, he knows what a potty is. And no other mother can be an absolute example for you, because she has her own child, and you have yours.
Don't overload yourself and your baby. Of course, early development is a good thing, but everything should be in moderation. Developmental activities (both at home and in groups) take a lot of time and effort from both children and parents. Choose short games, because children are still not able to maintain attention on one thing for a long time. Speak for 10 minutes, draw for 5, sing one song. Or you can even rattle pots: this, by the way, also develops hearing and coordination.
Distribute responsibilities. Of course, you want to be a super mom who worked out with the kids, went to the gym, painted her nails, and cooked borscht for the whole family, but it’s unlikely that you’ll be able to do all this well. If you don’t have enough time and energy for everything, grandma can take a walk with the little ones, and instead of borscht, your husband will eat store-bought dumplings or Chinese food ordered at home a couple of times a week. And, I must say, you won’t even get poisoned!
Set aside at least an hour a day for yourself and your business. Let it be anything from a warm bath to watching your favorite TV series. Yes, dad is tired from work, but rest is a change of activity, right?
Release your control. If you can calmly drink coffee only when the little one is stomping around the apartment in daddy's shoes, throwing toys around or tearing up newspapers, let him. In the end, removing the consequences of the game is not so difficult, but you will both be a little happier.
Don't be a recluse. Of course, your mother and grandmother are sure that a child under 3 years old should not be taken with you even to the store, but we know that if you follow the rules and safety precautions, a trip to the zoo or on a visit will not harm a single baby. As for long journeys, this is a controversial issue; it all depends on the characteristics of the baby. Some children have a hard time with traveling and transport, while others don’t care at all.
Spend 2 hours a week without your child. Let this become a good tradition: for example, on a day off, while the baby is sleeping, dad, grandmother or nanny looks after him. And at this time you are meeting with friends, going to salons and shops, or just reading a book in the park while having a snack milkshake cake.
Play sports- This the best remedy from depression. Physical activity (especially in the fresh air) invigorates, improves mood and improves immunity.
Don't forget about self-realization. Be sure to find yourself a hobby or a small remote job: this will make you feel not only like a mother, but also a full-fledged member of society.
Have mini-holidays for yourself. This sounds very funny, but for a mother on maternity leave, even buying a new shampoo is an event. So don't deny yourself the pleasure: regularly treat yourself with small purchases and goodies.
Find like-minded people and sympathizers. Whether it’s members of a forum for mothers, offline friends or relatives: someone should listen to you in difficult times, feel sorry for you and give good advice.
Determine your threshold, after which you are no longer human. And don’t bring yourself to this state. As soon as you feel a crisis point approaching, drop everything, transfer things and rest.

How to get out of depression

If you didn’t track the right moment and still burned out, the main thing is to admit it. Tell yourself: “Yes, I’m tired of everything, everything annoys me, and I have the right to do so.” And then everyone possible ways Take a vacation for yourself: sleep at least 10 hours a day, eat your favorite foods, do your favorite activities, or even go on a trip to change your surroundings. Of course, this will require the help of loved ones, so talk to them frankly. They certainly don’t want you to develop neurotic disorders.

It is programmed by nature that sooner or later almost every woman begins to want a child. She makes plans and dreams of how she will spend her maternity leave. However, after giving birth, especially if the child is the first, the woman faces unforeseen difficulties (lack of sleep, the whims of the baby, the inability to relax and take time to care for herself). All this contributes to the development of symptoms in women postpartum depression. The first months after the birth of a baby are a time when the strength of relationships in a young family is often tested.

Depression during maternity leave occurs especially often in sensitive and emotional women. They are naturally sociable and open-minded. Construction emotional connections with other people is a vital necessity for them.

It is not surprising that forced solitude and limited communication while a woman is “on maternity leave” causes her to experience a state of emotional deficiency, which she often feels as depression. People of this type have a huge emotional range and it is unnatural to limit it only to communication with their husband and child. As a result of the lack of realization of the emotional range, young mothers develop maternity depression: tearfulness appears, apathy sets in, and sometimes there are hysterics and panic attacks.

If a woman decides to have a child under pressure from her husband or driven by the need to realize her reproductive function up to 35-40 years old, but at the same time she has no need for motherhood, then it is likely that she will develop postpartum depression.

Factors contributing to depression

Appearance depressive state The following factors contribute:

Chronic fatigue. It is especially strong in the first four months after the birth of a child. At this time, the baby often suffers from gases caused by intestinal immaturity and is prone to bouts of evening crying. If, in addition, there are problems with lactation, then the woman does not know what to do and feels literally exhausted. Hence the tearfulness and despondency. In this case, we must remember that all this is a temporary phenomenon and in just a couple of months life will return to normal.
Monotony. If a mother on maternity leave needs communication, then you should not isolate yourself within four walls for a long time. Starting from one month old You can walk with your child in almost any weather, and a little later you can visit friends and even go shopping.
Dissatisfaction with the figure. Often after giving birth, a woman’s appearance undergoes changes, which is very upsetting for the young mother. Especially if the husband directly expresses his complaints to her. This is not a reason to isolate yourself. Correction of diet and motor activity Over time, they will help return the body to its former shape and get rid of depression.
Lack of experience. Women who have given birth to their first child often feel that they cannot cope with parenting and are doing everything wrong. As a result, they develop a feeling of inferiority. In this case, it is better to read the relevant literature and listen to the advice of mothers with children.

How to cope

To prevent the onset of depression during parental leave, psychologists recommend adhering to certain recommendations.

If it is difficult for a woman to cope with raising a child on her own, she needs to talk frankly with her husband and determine what responsibilities he is ready to take on. The conversation should be without shouting and complaints. But you should be prudent: if your spouse needs to get up early for work, you shouldn’t burden him with caring for the child at night.

During periods when it seems that everything is not going as it should, in order not to fall into depression, it is important to remember that there are no ideal parents. It is impossible to always do everything to the maximum. Even though sometimes you won’t be able to look perfect or wash the floor once again before your husband returns from work, you shouldn’t make a problem out of it.

For women for whom self-realization is important, remote work or training will help them get out of depression. By devoting a certain period of daytime to these activities, a woman will be able to avoid degradation and make good use of her maternity leave.

Sometimes you can relax total control and let the baby run the house. And while the child is busy, you can quietly read or drink a cup of tea. Early development a child is good, but everything should be in moderation. Everyday activities take a mother a lot of time and often turn out to be tiring for the baby. Sometimes it’s enough just to draw a little, read a book or make some Easter cakes.

Helps to cope with the development of postpartum depression physical activity and long-term hiking. This will allow the child to be in the fresh air for a long time, and the mother to maintain good physical shape and an even mood.

To take a break from homework, it is advisable to set aside a couple of hours a week to communicate with friends. At this time, you can visit a cafe, beauty salon or go shopping. If there is absolutely no one to replace a young mother during her vacation, it is advisable to hire a nanny. In this case, a woman can even combine child care with study or part-time work.

Therapy for depression

Drug treatment of women during lactation is not permissible. In case of emergency, the child is transferred to artificial feeding and only after that they prescribe potent drugs: antidepressants and tranquilizers. Typically the use of such strong drugs indicated only if before pregnancy the woman had any mental disorders or they appeared for the first time, but are clearly expressed and do not lend themselves to methods of psychocorrection.

Antidepressants show excellent therapeutic effect, but their use is possible only under the strict supervision of a doctor. Many of them have certain contraindications and side effects.

Aromatherapy is considered a gentle method. To do this, oils are added to the bath during bathing and used in an aroma lamp. The selection of oils should also be carried out by a doctor, since hypersensitivity they can cause harm. Oils of lavender, orange, lemon balm, and cedar have a good calming effect.